Family, Friends & Fellow Officers Remember...

Charlie, it's hard to belive it's been a little over 7 months since you have been gone. It seems like days. We all miss you. Mallory misses you too. She talks about you from time to time, and she talks about how you are in heaven and she will see you again one day. Please continue to watch over us and keep us safe.

Jenny
Sister-In-Law

February 4, 2008

I was going through my cell phone yesterday looking for a phone number and came across your cell number. I did not have the heart to erase it so I left it and the goofy picture we took of you last May in the office wearing the overly large size patrol hat that I am sure everyone in the department has now. The picture that is.
Every night that I go out to work, I have a routine. That is I drive by your house and check on Renee and your little man. Then I trek down to you dad's house and drive pass it. I don't know if anyone sees me or not because it is late by then, but I do it every night anyway.
Everyone here misses you and we think about you everyday. We know that you are with us in spirit and know that someday we will see you again.
God's Speed my friend.

February 3, 2008

When tomorrow starts without me,
And I'm not there to see;
If the sun should rise and find your eyes
All filled with tears for me;
I wish so much you wouldn't cry
The way you did today,
While thinking of the many things,
We didn't get to say.

I know how much you love me,
As much as I love you,
And each time that you think of me,
I know you'll miss me too;
But when tomorrow starts without me,
Please try to understand,
That an angel came and called my name,
And took me by the hand,
And said my place was ready,
In heaven far above,
And that I'd have to leave behind
All those I dearly love.

But as I turned to walk away,
A tear fell from my eye,
For all my life, I'd always thought,
I didn't want to die.
I had so much to live for,
So much yet to do,
It seemed almost impossible,
That I was leaving you.
I thought of all the yesterdays,
The good ones and the bad,
I thought of all the love we shared,
And all the fun we had.

If I could relive yesterday,
Just even for awhile,
I'd say goodbye and kiss you
And maybe see you smile.
But then I fully realized,
That this could never be,
For emptiness and memories,
Would take the place of me.
And when I thought of worldly things,
I might miss come tomorrow,
I thought of you, and when I did,
My heart was filled with sorrow.

But when I walked through heaven's gates,
I felt so much at home.
When God looked down and smiled at me,
From His great golden throne,
He said "This is eternity,
And all I've promised you."
Today for life on earth is past,
But here it starts anew.
I promise no tomorrow,
But today will always last,
And since each day's the same day
There's no longing for the past.

But you have been so faithful,
So trusting and so true.
Thought there were times you did some things,
You knew you shouldn't do.
But you have been forgiven
And now at last you're free.
So won't you take my hand
And share my life with me?

So when tomorrow starts without me,
Don't think we're far apart,
For every time you think of me,
I'm right here, in your heart.

February 1, 2008

You didn't see it coming,
but that's usually the case.
Not even all the training in the World,
could of prepared you for this.

You left the station,
for your reports had been filed.
You were to return to duty,
to wait for the ending of the shift.

You didn't know it,
but your shift would end too soon.
There wasn't even a warning,
for none had ever expected this.

As you walked to your crusier,
shots rang out.
You drew your weapon,
and managed to fire back.

While falling helplessly to the ground,
you radioed for help.
The nine shots in your body,
must have been too much.

Just when you thought the gunshots had stopped,
the gunman walked over,
just to fire...
One More Shot.

A killer is wounded.
An officer is dead.
The murderer will live,
While a family must pay.

January 31, 2008

A gentleman offered this statement
as they laid my dad to rest,
"Today your dad's a Hero son,
and truly nothing less!"

Into his eyes I peered,
as the tears rolled gently down.
My response was kind and simple
the only words that could be found.

My dad was an officer
and a Hero every day.
He made this world a safer place
for you and me to stay.

A Hero who sadly offered
the news too hard to give.
A Hero who prevented tragedy,
allowing us to live.

A Hero you asked directions from
when lost or out of town.
A Hero who aided those in need,
allowing ease to get around.

A Hero who returned your child
when danger threatened near.
A Hero who protected freedom
so we'd have less to fear.

Yes, my dad was a Hero sir,
which he showed in every way.
But, today he is a Hero sir,
because of the price he had to pay.

January 31, 2008

We found out today that the County is going to recognize us as having a right to bargain for a contract, bud. I wish you could be here to see this, Charlie. We will be the first in Missouri to make this happen. We will make history. It feels hollow as hell. I saw your boy today, I hate to say it has been too long since I have seen him. It burns my eyes to look at him. He is you, smaller maybe, but that smile, man, it is you. I meant to say more here, Charlie. Hard as it is to believe of me, I just can't seem to find any words. Miss you, brother.

A Brother
BCSD

January 30, 2008

bubby,
Today is 7 months that you've been gone. god!!!I miss you so much. I hope you know how much i love you and you will never be forgotten. We all miss you. It's getting so hard for all of us. Please keep watching over all of us....I love you bubby. your my hero!!!

kailee
sister

January 28, 2008

Dad...so many images come to mind
whenever I speak your name;
It seems without you in my life
things have never been the same.
What happened to those lazy days
when I was just a child;
When my life was consumed in you
in your love, and in your smile.
What happened to all those times
when I always looked to you;
No matter what happened in my life
you could make my gray skies blue.
Dad, some days I hear your voice
and turn to see your face;
Yet in my turning...it seems
the sound has been erased.
Dad, who will I turn to for answers
when life does not make sense;
Who will be there to hold me close
when the pieces just don't fit.

Oh, Dad, if I could turn back time
and once more hear your voice;
I'd tell you that out of all the dads
you would still be my choice.

Please always know I love you
and no one can take your place;
Years may come and go
but your memory will never be erased.

Today, Jesus, as You are listening
in your home above;
Would you go and find my dad
and give him all my love.

Trevor

January 27, 2008

Those we love don't go away,
They walk beside us every day,
Unseen, unheard, but always near,
Still loved, still missed and very dear.

Renee

January 27, 2008

_________________________
You wonder why that cop was so mean
He just got done working a case where a drunk driver killed a kid
____________________________________________
You work for 8 hours
He works for up to 18 hours
_________________________
You drink hot coffee to stay awake.
The cold rain in the middle of the nite keeps him awake.
__________________________
You complain of a "headache", and call in sick.
He goes into work still hurt and sore from the guy he had to fight the night before
__________________________
You drink your coffee on your way to the mall.
He spills his as he runs code to a traffic crash with kids trapped inside
__________________________
You make sure your cell phone is in your pocket before you leave the house.
He makes sure his gun is clean and fully loaded and his vest is tight
__________________________
You talk trash about your "buddies" that aren't with you.
He watches his buddy get shot at, and wounded in front of him.
__________________________
You walk down the beach, staring at all the pretty girls.
He walks down the highway looking for body parts from a traffic crash
_________________________
You complain about how hot it is.
He wears fifty pounds of gear and a bullet proof vest in the middle of July and still runs around chasing crack heads
__________________________
You go out to lunch, and complain because the restaurant got your order wrong.
He runs out before he gets his food to respond to an armed robbery.
__________________________
You get out of bed in the morning and take your time getting ready.
He gets called out of bed at 2 am after working 12 hours and has to be into work asap for a traffic homicide
__________________________
You go to the mall and get your hair redone.
He keeps the bloody hair out of a college girl's face that just smacked the windshield in a crash while waiting for an ambulence.
__________________________
You're angry because your class ran 5 minutes over.
His shift ended 4 hours ago and there's no end in sight
__________________________
You call your girlfriend and set a date for tonight.
He can't make any plans because on his off days he still gets called back into work
__________________________
You yell and scream at the squad car that just past you beacuse they slowed you down.
He's in the driver seat of the squad car, going to cut somebody out of their car only to find out that they're dead when he gets there.
__________________________
You roll your eyes when a baby cries in public
He picks up a dead child in his arms and prays that it was crying
__________________________
You criticize your police dept and say they're never there quick enough.
He blasts the siren while the person in front of him refuses to move while talking on their cell phone and doing their makeup.
__________________________
You hear the jokes about fallen officers and say they should have known better.
He is a hero and runs into situations when everyone else is running away in order to make sure no one else gets hurt and lose's his life doing it
__________________________
You sit there and judge him, saying that its a waste of money to have them around.
Yet as soon as you need help he is there

January 27, 2008

Why is it that I had never noticed a "Charlie" pink sky before you passed? Is it because there weren't any or is it because I never slowed down and took the time to take in the simple things in life?
I cannot believe it has been 7 months. There have been so many things you have missed that you would have loved to have been a part of.
Trevor got in on a good work-out today. Papa told him that if he sat real still he could stay back there and watch Papa and Uncle Joe Joe work out. He came out every once in a while to show me and Mimi what you guys were doing back there. Papa and Uncle Joe Joe had it drilled into his head that "No Girls Allowed" in the work-out room.
I finally took the Christmas lights down today (well, not all the way). A part of the wire is frozen in the gutter and it got up to like 55 degrees today! The lights hanging there look pretty classy!
The date "28th" is yet another painful reminder that you are not here.
Missing you........

Renee

January 27, 2008

I still miss you, it never gets better. You will always be with me in body and in soul, heart and mind. I Love You Bubby Bigger than the Sky. Forever and Always. Your still my #1. Love, Sissy

Kierstan Cook
Little Sister

January 26, 2008

Talking about you, still hurts every now and then. miss you charlie.

Brittany
Sister-in-law.

January 23, 2008

The medicine helps me to sleep better, but I still see you in my dreams. I wake up crying. I miss you so badly. I Will NEVER forget you. Please continue to watch over me and help me make the right decisions in my life, as you always have. Still my #1! Best Friends Forever. I Love You Bigger than the Sky Bubby... Love, Sissy

Kierstan Cook
Little Sister

January 23, 2008

We miss you Charlie

January 23, 2008

What I wouldn't give to hear you call me a "jerkwad" today...... Miss you Chas.

Ruthie

January 22, 2008

I found myself waiting for your "Happy Birthday" phone call this morning. It's not the same without my best friend.
It's just another horrible day. I know if there were phones in Heaven. I would of got the call. I guess it will have to be enough to have heard it in my dream. I Love You Bigger than the Sky. Best Friends Forever, Love Sissy

Kierstan Cook
Little Sister

January 17, 2008

Charlie, I saw your truck today. And its so weird to see your dad driving it and not you. Sometimes I look for your truck at Belt and Pickett, after I am leaving dads house. I used to see you there all the time when you were on the way to working out with dad. We all miss you Charlie.

Jenny
Sister-In-Law

January 17, 2008

I hear little children laughing
and the sound brings my soul such pain.
Yet I know in my heart that life goes on
and I must learn to live again.

Some days I stay so busy
I don’t even realize you’re gone.
Then there are all of those other days when
I feel like I can’t go on.

Sometimes I think I dreamed you…
that you never existed for real.
You’ve been gone so long and I’m just not strong
for my life has become surreal.

They tell me it’s time to let go
and build a new life without you.
But the builder is weak and I can’t even speak
and I don’t know what else to do.

How long will this pain last, Lord?
How many tears have I already cried?
It seems like forever since my world fell apart
when my loved one died.

January 14, 2008

Peace in My Soul
It was such an awesome day
and I stopped to stare up at the sky.
My heart skipped a beat as I heard you speak
when you asked the angel, “Why?”

“I wrote ‘I love you’ in the sky
as big and as plain as can be.
How can she stand down there and look up here
and still not be able to see?”

The clouds were broken and thin,
and swirled randomly through the air.
I searched and strained at all that remained
of the swirls of white still there.

The angel’s voice was soft and low
as I smiled and raised my brow,
and I heard her say in the strangest way
“She’s starting to see it now.”

There’s a bittersweet peace in my soul
and a sense of awesome pride
knowing you’re up there writing words in the air,
and our love has never died.

January 14, 2008

I don't understand this. I'm suffering because youre gone. i can't eat or sleep, yet I still think you're here. I see you in my dreams, I hear your voice, they're like little movies, and then comes the funeral. I wake up screaming. Going to school is hard after not being able to go to bed until 4am or sometimes later. It just keeps getting harder. There are times when something goes wrong or I need someone to talk to, and its all I can do not to pick up the phone and dial your number. Every time I go to Dads and see your truck in the driveway I think "Cool, Bubby's here, I really need to talk to him" then I realize, your not and I cant. I'll see you in my dreams, if i'm able to sleep. I Love You Bubby, Bigger than the Sky. Forever and Always. Still missing you. Love, Sissy

Kierstan Cook
Little Sister

January 14, 2008

We miss you Charlie. Gone but NEVER forgotten.

January 14, 2008

Well, I got back into working out again. Today was my first day back since our last work-out. After work today I was heading over to Tom's and found myself looking for you at Belt and Pickett where we would usually meet on our way over there. As I started to drive up Tom's street I started reminicing over all our work-out's, and how you would leave me a nasty remark on my notebook when I didn't show up. Tom finally retired that old bench. He bought a squat-rack/bench combo, but he is still keeping the old bench around "just in case". Tom has started doing squats again, "don't know if I'll go that far", you know how we loved squats. We still have the old dumbell chairs, although the good one is now falling apart. I miss you bud.

Joel Cook
Brother and Fellow Officer

January 13, 2008

To hear everyone talk about you, it kills me.... I miss you so badly and it only gets worse. Papa took me, MJ, Nae, and Trev out to eat for my birthday last night. There was kind of this silence over everyone. Trev was playing with the silverware and he took the knife but told us that the fork and spoon was his daddys. Life without you is just breaking everyones heart more and more. I missed you so badly at that table. What I would give to have you back, you have no idea. Lifes so empty, so lifeless. You mean the world to everyone. The whole family treated and loved you as if you were their own. You were everyones everything. Aunt Juli helped raise you until Mom came along, but she still slways helped whenever she could. You were just like Papas own son. You are Dads baby boy. He still cant bear the pain, as well as the rest of us. But his is deeper, you are his first born, his baby, his best friend. I have a sense of what hes going through. But you were his son, therefore he has a pain worse than anyone else. He still cant talk about it. Its hard for all of us. We all tried to do our best by you, you never hated anyone. I hope that I managed to do that. I Love You Bigger than the Sky Bubby. Still Best Friends Forever. #1! Love, Sissy

Kierstan
Sister

January 12, 2008

BUBBY I CANT DO IT WITHOUT U ANYMORE.I LOVE 2 SEE TREBO HE IS LIKE A TWIN 2 U.HE IS GROWING FAST AND HE IS VERY SMART.BUBBY I WOULD GIVE MY LIFE 2 HAVE U BACK I LOVE U SO MUCH.DAD HAS A G-FRIEND NOW LOL.SHE IS VERY NICE.BUBBY I MISS U SO MUCH TREBO ALWAYS TELLS US THAT U ARE HAPPY IN HEAVEN.I LOVE U WITH ALL OF MY HEART BUBBY.HAPPY 2008 AND U ARE IN ALL OF MY THOUTS AND ORAYERS.

Buck
Brother

January 10, 2008