Family, Friends & Fellow Officers Remember...

You were with me tonight. I still think of you.

Savannah
Daughter

July 1, 2018

You're the reason I joined LE. You were there for me when I was 6 yo and my dad died. You made me feel safe and secure. You taught me a very important part of the job. Thank you, rest in peace brother.

Sgt. A. Andrews
HH DPS

April 20, 2018

Jes, Spent the afternoon of March 25th with the guy's at Plainfield drinking and reminiscing. Then I sent the photo's of us to your dad so that he would know we do not forget. It was a cold and miserable day, but the Jesse stories kept us warm with laughter. Savannah is doing great at Penn State and I know you are looking on with pride. Jacob is finishing high school and also doing well. We miss those hugs every day. Love you son

Charlie
Phila Pd.

April 6, 2018

Semper Fi Brother.

SDS Mark McCormack
NYPD Retired

March 25, 2018

Rest In Peace Brother LEO. Thank you and your family for your sacrifice and service to this country.

Officer Mike Robinson (Ret)
Upland Police Dept. CA

March 25, 2018

Today I left a reflection for yet another Officer who has been sent to heaven. I am heartbroken. I would like Jesse's father, the rest of his family, friends, coworkers to know that I think of him and pray for all of you every day. I can't believe it has been 13 years since I got that terrible phone call. I still vividly remember the last time I saw him, his smile, his warm hug. I am so sorry for all of you, and for everyone who never got to meet perhaps the nicest person they would ever know. Please know that I will continue to speak his name, JESSE ERICK SOLLMAN , so that he will never be forgotten. Love and peace to all of you.

Ilona Allen

March 8, 2018

Happy belated birthday. Ya woulda been 49; an olde person or something like that. :-))
Goodness, that means I'm real old. :-(

John R
Father

December 5, 2017

Thinking of you today. You have not been forgotten.

Bob Gordon
Father of Michael P. Gordon, EOW: 8\8\04

March 25, 2017

Always thinking of Jesse, his family, friends and coworkers.

Ilona

January 17, 2017

Happy belated Birthday Jesse,
PoPs :)

John R Sollman

December 6, 2016

The years pass but it seems like yesterday that you were here, but to those that love you dearly it has felt like a lifetime since they heard your voice, saw your smile and hugged you. Spring is here and the warm rains will come. Those that love you will know that:

"A Raindrop landing on your check
Is a kiss from someone that lives in Heaven
And is Watching Over You."

You will never be forgotten.

Bob Gordon
Father of Fallen Chicago Officer: Michael P. Gordon, EOW: 8/8/04

March 25, 2016

Carin I thought of you today, then I found this page! You are an inspiration to me. I still have that teapot you gave me and it reminds me of you and your family. I thank God for keeping watch over you and the kids, I can't believe they are teenagers already!! I read your reflections, Jesse would be proud of you!! I continue to keep your family in my thoughts and prayers.
Tutu.

Tutu
Former co- worker

January 26, 2016

Happy Birthday Jesse. I think of you every day.

John R
Father

December 4, 2015

Thinking of you and the kids, Carin.

Ilona

May 4, 2015

I thought I left a reflection yesterday. Please keep watch over your loved ones. I know 10 years may have passed but you have not been forgotten and that will never be the case for those that love you dearly. You are a true hero.

Bob Gordon
Father of Michael P. Gordon, EOW: 8/8/04

March 26, 2015

A Hero in Heaven, always remembered and never forgotten.

Kim Weigand Mom of Sgt. Mike Weigand
PA C.O.P.S.

March 23, 2015

Hey uncle jess,
Missing you a lot as always...think of you everyday...I work in easton now. About a block away from the police station.. And I always wonder how different it would be if you were still here...Its crazy to think about how long its been. I just wish you knew how much we all still miss and love you! But until we meet again xoxo

Lexie Holzheimer

March 3, 2015

Happy Birthday, Jesse. You would be an olde 46 today ;-)

Love & miss you.

PoPs ☺

John Sollman
Father

December 4, 2014

To the family and friends of Officer Sollman,

Just know there are people out there that never met you but still consider you part of their family...you are thought of and prayers go out to you all. May the good memories of Jesse carry you through the tough times. God bless.

Patrolman
East Brunswick, NJ

November 24, 2014

Hey Jes ~

It’s been a while since I left a reflection on here, but I do still come on often to see if there are any new ones and to read through the old ones. Some days I will spend hours starting at the very beginning and will read through to the end. It’s like a diary, really. A documentation of my journey over the past 9 years. And while it is extremely emotional for me to go back to the beginning and to revisit those very dark and lonely places - at the same time it is incredibly cathartic because it reminds me of how far I have come, how much I have been through and how much I have grown. It’s really hard to believe you’ve been gone 9 years, that is such a long time. But I feel like reading through the reflections helps to make those 9 years not seem as long, helps to bridge the gap between my old life and my new one and helps to keep you close to me.

The anniversary of your EOW is still very painful for me, Jes. I really thought that as time went on, it would get easier but it really hasn’t. It’s like my heart knows what day it is before I even wake up and the sadness is just overwhelming. All of the awfulness of that day just hits me and my brain is just jumbled with so many thoughts. Thoughts of you that morning walking out of the bedroom, leaving for work. Thoughts of our last conversation at lunchtime. Thoughts of when I found out you’d been shot and the horrible few hours afterwards. Thoughts of seeing you in the hospital. Thoughts of going home that night and walking in the house alone, knowing how much my life had changed and that you would never be coming home again. Thoughts of laying in bed with the kids, wondering how I was ever going to tell them that their daddy was gone.

So many, many thoughts. It makes my stomach hurt and my eyes burn just thinking about it all now.

From the moment you died, Jes, every decision I’ve made has been with the kids’ best interests at heart - I’m sure you know that. I’ve really tried to be a good mother to them, and it wasn’t always easy but overall I think I’ve done a good job. I do have to apologize to you, though, because I let some bad people into our lives. I always thought I was a good judge of character, but in the first few years after you died I definetly made some bad decisions. There were a few people who I allowed into our lives who were nothing short of evil, who disguised themselves as your friend, who pretended to be concerned and caring but the truth is they were only there for their own benefit. They took advantage of the situation, of me, and of the kids. It’s taken me a while, but I’ve finally forgiven myself for allowing these people into our lives - they caused nothing but chaos, confusion and pain. I realize now that they were nothing more than opportunists without a moral compass who preyed on my vulnerability, grief and loneliness. Hindsight has given me clarity and I see them now for the despicable people that they truly are, and I am so very sorry I ever let them into our lives.

Our lives have only gotten better over the past few years. Starting in early 2009 things really turned around for us - it was like the storm clouds were finally passing and I could see the light at the end of the very long tunnel I’d been in since you died. Questions I had began to be answered, things began to make sense to me again.......my life changed dramatically. I owe much of it to Michael - he came along at the most crucial time for me and the kids, and I am so grateful every single day that he is in our lives and I know you are able to rest in peace because he is here taking care of all the things you can’t. Of course you would rather be here yourself, living your life and raising your children, but I know in my heart that you sent Michael to us. He and I talk about the circumstances of us getting together and it sends chills down both our spines. There is no doubt in either of our minds that things now are the way they are supposed to be. Thank you, Jes. Thank you for looking out for us and taking such good care of us both when you were here, and after you were gone.

The kids are doing great. Savannah is finishing up her freshman year and Jake 6th grade. They are both on highest honor roll. Jake serves on student council as his Class Representative, he plays lacrosse and is learning to ride (and maybe someday race) motocross. Savannah is wicked smart and very interested in computers - she loves graphic design, and is also learning how to code. Within the next few months she should be able to develop her own server. She’s already looking into colleges and has plans to work for the CIA after graduation. I know you are so incredibly proud of both of them - they are really wonderful kids.

Losing you was hard on them, Jes. It left scars on their souls that can really never be healed.......it changed who they are, on the inside, and it breaks my heart. I would do anything to take it all away for them. But it also gave them strength, courage and a capacity for empathy that is way beyond their years. They both have a friend who lost their father this year, and they went out of their way to offer comfort and consolation - they both said that maybe one of the reasons you died was so that someday, they could help other people who are going through the same thing. They are truly amazing, and I am so very proud of them.

Of course I can never leave a reflection without mentioning your friends, and how your loss continues to impact them. They remain loyal and true to you, Jes, and they honor you on your EOW the same way every year. I’m sure you know this - and I’m sure you are with them.

I’m sure you are with all of us who love you. You memory lives on in so many ways. I love to come on here and see reflections from the same people as well as from new ones - it means you continue to touch people. You’ve been gone 9 years and yet you are still having an impact on people’s lives - that is an incredible legacy!!

Please continue to watch over us. And I promise you that no matter how much time passes, I will always love you, always miss you and will always come here to read your reflections and remember you - your life and your legacy. I will forever be the guardian of your memory, Jes, and you will never be forgotten.

Always and Forever,
Carin

Carin (Sollman) Radogna
widow

May 7, 2014

I was thinking about you (Jesse) and your family, I do very often. I then came across "Reflections." Watching over me and your brothers again!! Huh? I never had the chance to thank you from the deepest part of my heart. Thank you for watching over me and especially your brothers! Your smile made everyone else smile, which gave everyone around you a feeling of peace and comfort! Thank you so much for that!

Carin, I want you to know that you are an inspiration! I have read a lot of your reflections. I know Jesse reads every single one! I want you to know, even on a bad day, that your inspiration, strength, and love truly touches so many of us! I am sure your children helped in so many ways! Just a smile, a hug, I love you,...They help us keep going in so many ways!

Jesse, it is never the "End of Watch" I know you will always be watching!!

I will always love you brother!!

Anonymous
Friend

April 20, 2014

You will always be deep in my heart!! Thank you so much for all of your help and looking out for me on the street! Your family is in my prayers!

EMT Carin
EMS

April 19, 2014

Jesse,

I can't believe it has been 9 years. I think about you a lot and wish things could have been different. There have been so many times where there have been situations where I have wished you were still here to help out.

You and your family are always in my thoughts and prayers. And don't you worry because with all your Mom has been through she is still tough as nails and doing fine.

I come to this page often and read the reflections and think about you.

You are missed more than you will ever know.

S.O. Antoinette Hartman
Somerset County Sheriff's Office

March 25, 2014

Dear Jesse,

Another Bad Friday has arrived. Your old man misses you every day. Your years with him at 64-07 were his happiest even though living together in that small apartment was a challenge at times.

Please continue to keep a watchful eye on PoPs. He needs you now more than ever.

Love to both my dudes!

Betty
Father's Wife

March 25, 2014

It has been 9 years since you were called away and your memory is still carried in the hearts of those that love and miss you dearly. Continue to keep watch over all of them.
You will never be forgotten.

"A raindrop landing on your cheek
Is a Kiss from someone that lives in Heaven
And is watching over you."

Bob Gordon
Father of Fallen Chicago Officer: Michael P. Gordon, EOW: 8/8/04

March 24, 2014