Family, Friends & Fellow Officers Remember...

Well the holiday season is here, the fog is rolling in and the rain is falling down. Your not here to be wearing those short sleeves as all of us are freezing cold. It seems like just yesterday you were here yet it has been close to a year. I used to look at this site every single day several times a day. Now I can bare to check it every couple of weeks. I see your picture on this site and how and remember how it stayed the same the 6 years I grew up in front of you. I just wanted to let you know you are missed during the holiday season and every season at that. You will not be forgotten. I think people are starting to lax and it kind of irks me. I know you of all people would want this to be an eye opener for people, telling them to keep their guard up. I wish you were back training us all and spending time with everyone again.

Jason Brock
Ceres Police Department

December 13, 2005

well sarg, this weekened i realized its been almost a year, yet it seems like just yesterday. i don't talk about it alot, but i think about it. I'm not with the Explorers anymore because i've reached the age limit. Right now im just working and saving up for police academy. Someday i hope to be as good of a police officer as you were. You'll definately never be forgotten.

Former Explorer Jensen
CPD

December 12, 2005

Eleven months and it still feels unreal. How can this be? I think about you everyday, every single day. Sometimes I laugh or smile and then I think hey, what’s wrong? Why does this feel odd? Then I remember that you’re not here anymore. Somebody has killed you, removed you from our lives. I try to find the grace in the pain, the reason in the crime. It’s the most difficult thing I have ever tried to comprehend. It just doesn’t work, like plaids with stripes, only far, far worse. I can’t make the pieces fit, they never will. She’s right; your work here was finished. If I think about it that way, I can better find a sense of peace about your death. Still, I thought we had many more years together, all of us. I appreciate how much you gave to this family, enriched our worlds. I am grateful for the time that I did have with you. I just long for much, much more. I love you so much.

December 9, 2005

Hi How, miss you every second of everyday...I know you are with me. Mom went into the hospital last week we almost lost her too. I found comfort knowing she would see our Lord and family. I know she would have kissed you for me. We prayed and God let her stay here for now. I told her I need her here so her work can't be done just yet. We share a loss of a soulmate and she understands my pain! I tell her things that I could not share with anyone else. I know you want me to be strong, and I am. With mom I can cry and she understands. I need her here to be my best friend cause you are busy in heaven. She misses you too. She said she will not be sad when her work is done. I understood, yet I am selfish I can not lose you both. Sorry To many officers are dying. I feel so much pain and wish people could love instead of hate...You are a lover and I am truely blessed. Thank You. Kissing you in my heart love you soulmate

kathy wife

December 6, 2005

Brother Stevenson,

May the road rise up to meet you,
May the wind be always at your back,
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
And the rains fall soft upon your fields,
And until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of His hand.

Respectfully,
You’re Brothers in Blue

Untouchables Law Enforcement Motorcycle

December 2, 2005

HOLIDAY:

We think of you and your family during these holidays, and offer thoughts and prayers as you celebrate without your loved one. Cherish the memories of the past and be open to new ones with your loved ones and friends. Your loved one will never be forgotten and always honored for their sacrifice.

Alissa Scott
Widow of Wayne Scott
E.O.W. 09-10-02

Lisa Schultz
Widow of Don Schultz
E.O.W. 05-12-03

Co-Founders of Survivor Help Network
www.survivorhelpnetwork.org

November 29, 2005

Happy Thangsgiving we miss you so much!!!!!!!!you are always in our thoughts... we played volleyball together after we ate. Nothing will ever be the same... Thank you for leaving me with great family! LOVE YOU SOULMATE til then

kathy wife

November 25, 2005

Hi How, we are geting ready to spend our first THANGSGIVING without you. Your beautiful loving presents will be felt in our hearts. We will miss you cooking, laughing and playing with us. We will miss going on our geocaching adventure. How will we ever walk off our meal without you leading the way? Your family will be here with us. Bryce, your Dad and Leroy are going pheasant hunting Thanksgiving morning. I'm sure you will be with them; leading them to the biggest birds. Your Mom is planning to make "Dan sauce" with the pheasants. Micky is going to hang out with us and help us cook up a storm and maybe teach us some softball skills to work off our meals. You never leave our thoughts and you left us with great loving memories. THANK YOU. Happy Thanksgiving say Hi to everyone, we will see you soon when our work is done. LOve you soulmate

wife, Kathy

November 22, 2005

hi uncle howie. i miss you. i cant believe its been 10 months. i think about you everyday. you have a special place on my binder!! so in class im always praying for aunt kathy and mik and bryce.im doing pretty good in school.im in cheer and we won superbowl saturday it was at Ceres high. made me think of you.i got all star for cheer. going to miss you during the holidays but i know your watching over us. i havent seen aunt kathy, mik, or bryce lately. i really miss them.i am always here for them tho.i love them and you so much. miss you. forever in my heart.<3
Sov

sovauhna (niece)

November 21, 2005

Howie,
We miss you so much. I cannot believe it's been a whole 10 months already. It seems like only yesterday we were laughing and having a good time together. You are always here with us no matter what we are doing or where we are. I know Kathy and the kids miss you so much. They are staying strong and we will be there with them. Greg & I and our kids miss their Uncle Howie too. Heck, you're missed by everyone that knew you. We love you.

Shawnna Yotsuya

November 18, 2005

Kathy,

We are so sorry for your loss. My wife and I read these pages every day. Our notorious date is October 20, 2005, when we lost our brother/brother-in-law. Reading your postings has brought tears to our eyes and we want you to know that while you would not trade a moment you had with Howie, he was very lucky to have you as well. God bless you and your children. We will certainly remember your husband's name and through your words will appreciate him and all he stood for.

Shawn and Michelle Rogers
Sister and Brother-in-law
Sergeant Jonathan Dragus EOW 10/20/05

Shawn Rogers

November 17, 2005

Most people are unable to truly understand (and I NEVER want another person/family member to walk this horrible path of despair and grief -- although I know it is inevitable) that time does not move forward for us. We do what we must, we eat, we smile, we drink (hello, thank goodness for that!), and we most certainly appreciate those that offer supportive and loving words and gestures. we are endlessly grateful for the kindness and concern of those that loved you and continue to love and honor you...But for us, it will remain January 2005, no matter what the calendar reads. Yes, perhaps we should accept those dinner invitations or “Have a wonderful holiday season” as we are offered to do so. But it is extremely difficult to physically “be in November” or December or anytime when our emotional state hovers with you on your final days with us. I know it has been ‘ten whole months already”. But to me, to us it’s still January 9, 2005 – when there was still life in us as well as you. I LOVE YOU. and I really, REALLY miss you. We all do.

November 17, 2005

Howie
You were such an awesome officer. It was such a pleasure to know and work with you. Every time I responded to a call and you were the backup officer, I knew I had a true "back up". You showed us all what it was like to be a brother. Your presence is truely missed and I can say it isnt the same without you backing us up. Thestreets are never going to be the same without you protecting them, but I will say this; the streets where you are are definately safer due to your presence! Go get 'em cowboy!

Deputy CM
SCSO

November 16, 2005

Just me again How, MISS YOU!!! we had a great weekend with family...I know you know because you were with all of us, yet you were the only one without a hangover in the morning, even though you had your share of MARTINI'S. I do not know what we would do without each other! You would be proud of all of us. We love you We miss you and you are always in our daily lives because you made our lives rich !!! love you soulmate

kathy wife

November 14, 2005

Hi How, can't stop thinking about you. remembering everyday we had together...none of them I would trade. You made us feel so very special too you. Thank You so much. There will never be anyone good enough to take your place. Everyday I wake thinking of you, hoping this is all a bad nightmare. I Know you are safe in heaven and that is what gets me through eachday. I try to do what we both would have done as a team, care for our family, make life fun and loving. I ask God often for help, I'm sure he is tired of hearing from me at times. Thank goodness He does not need sleep. We all are working together to make a new normal, though we still can not think deeply about not having you here to play with, to work with, and to live with. We miss you so much We love you more than words could ever say. Hope to see you someday when my work is done, til then love you soulmate.....

wife kathy

November 4, 2005

Howard:
You would be so touched, as we are, at how much money, time, energy, materials and love the community has put forth toward your memorial grove. Most of it has been donated! It’s astounding to observe how many lives you affected both in life and death. Close friends and strangers alike unite to immortalize your memory, dedication, and your ultimate sacrifice for the betterment of the community that you loved so much. I am so grateful and proud. I know you would just shake your head in that gentle, disbelieving way and smile your sweet smile if you were physically here to witness the magnificent display of support. I love you so much, I am so proud of you.

November 2, 2005

Saludos hermano, pronto me pondre en contacto con tu esposa e hijos, te recuerdo con afecto.

Sergio Faz.

October 28, 2005

Howard,
You probably already know this....but Kathy ALMOST beat me at billiards tonight!!! And yes, Micky did beat me a few games.

October 22, 2005

How:
As you know, it’s duck season and daddy is getting ready for what has always been his favorite time of year. Please help him get through this season without you. It’s already proving to be so much more difficult than even I thought it would be for him. He is productive but his heart hurts in a special way that only the two of you can know; the father son bond you shared as you helped him methodically prepare the blind, the decoys, and planned your hunts together. We all hurt so much without you and dread the coming holidays, but I feel so powerless as I can offer little help to our devastated parents. Maybe you can send over some AAA Canvasbacks all season so that he will know you’re right there in the blind with him as well as looking down from “Mallard Heaven”. Please watch over him, keep your spirit all around him as he faces yet another milestone of this year without you. I love you.

October 21, 2005

Hay babe, three times i have left you a note, three times this crazy place did not take them. try try again...here I go, We miss you, we love you, we know you are with us always! You already know our kids are great, just like you. We are spending our days as if you might walk in the door. We know what you would expect of us and we are doing our best to live up to that and more. The days come and go..we work as a team to make them right,to do what is prudent; to love each other and all the friends and family that are working hard to make the world a better place. We know that the task is great yet you never gave up, so nor will we!!! You know all the other's that share this dream, the dream that someday no one will have to know loss. There are to many.....we will follow your lead because you and your brothers and sisters in blue are special in our lords eyes. John 15:13 Micky and I went to the SWAT dinner last week, everyone missed you and treated us like family. They were all special family, some we knew some we met, some we will only know through words,yet all still family thanks to who you are. Bryce would have gone but again he was hard at work just like you, we filled him in on the night's events. LOVE YOU SOUL MATE

wife howard
cpd

October 18, 2005

Sgt Stevenson was killed in the line of duty doing the job he loved, protecting people.

We should never forget officers of the calibre of Howie Stevenson.

God bless him.

Sgt Paul Lamb
Essex Police, England

October 17, 2005

Not a day goes by where I don't think about you. You are not forgotten. Rest in peace brother.

MGR
SCSD

October 16, 2005

funny thing.. they brought the old "Night Stalker" series to TV. All I could think about is how much we loved and dreaded that show. It's not the same, of course, as when the orignal
KarL Kolcack traced and tracked down his subjects...

Love you How...
Miss you

October 16, 2005

Tick tock, the days pass but the pain and disbelief doesn't recede. And when will it finally sink in?

I do what I can to go on, but the vacancy you left seems too huge at times.

I really miss you. I love you.

October 9, 2005

Howie, so many times have I wanted to leave you a message. I've tried writing to you so many times but yet the words would never come to me. I finally read a verse today and immediately thought of you. It describes you perfectly and what so many of us can only hope to be.

"Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends."
John 15:13

You will never be forgotten.

Jason Brock
Ceres Police Department

September 27, 2005