Family, Friends & Fellow Officers Remember...

Brandy was one of the sweetest officers at MCSO. May he rest in Peace!

Kelly Roszman
MCSO Explorer

May 13, 2005

Brandy,

I am thinking about You everday Bran. I am celebrating the Hero that You are and the Honor that You have left all of us. It was a true Honor to know You and to enjoy You here. The hope although tough sometimes is knowing that this separation that Your family and friends feel now is not forever. I know that doesn't help now but that somehow makes it bearable. Man, You will live on in all of us and be honored everday Your brothers in Law Enforcement put on this uniform. There is a day of reckoning and justice swiftly coming for the waste of life.(I would use profanity if I could.) I promise You brother no matter how long it takes We will carry this burden until it is done. Only true Honor and Courage live on in this life. Just think about how much good you accomplished while You were here. Brandy, this is Your story and Your legacy. It is only in the arms of Heros such as Yourself that evil and despair are conqured in this life. I honor You brother, I think of You always. I will see You again, I am eternally confident of this. "Poi si torno' 'all eterna fontana."

Ptl.T.D.HILL
Ontario Police

May 13, 2005

With Mother's Day and Police Week, I know that this is going to be a difficult week for the family. Give them plenty of angel hugs and protect them in their travels.

May 12, 2005

Brandy,
I've been here many times and just couldn't leave you a message. You have left a little piece of yourself with all of us.

We are getting ready for another open water weekend with new divers. I don't think anyone could possibly display as much enthusiasm as you did. I think of you each and every time I see one of our log books, and that silly orange wet suit. I will always remember you walking onto the pool deck in your "Scuba Steve" outfit. Funny how the name stuck.

Ron and I often talk about the weekend that we were all together at Portage, and what fun we had, yet learning at the same time. All of us. You taught us just as much as we taught you. I remember you calling the boys on the way to dinner, and how we all said we should enjoy this time while we had it because we wouldn't be together again like that. I thought it would just be because of scheduling. I had no idea...

I look at the picture of the team every day. And I think of you being my buddy in not the best of dives. And no matter how bad the viz, or what bucket we found, you never let go.

We miss you so much Brandy. Thank you for being a part of our lives, and for letting us be a part of yours.

Peace out brother. God Bless.

Ron and Michal Searls
Marion County Sheriff's Office

May 11, 2005

Bran,
Tomorrow we leave for D.C. and I can't sleep. Nerves I guess. I put some stuff together to take and leave at the wall. Just a few things that were special to you. One of your uniform shirts, a die cast sheriff's cruiser, some letters, a DJ key chain, and a few other poems and stuff from the funeral.

The next few days will be emotional and difficult. Please watch over all of us and help us make it through. I know you are always with us.

I hope the boys do okay with Aunt Marilyn. She has stayed with them a couple of times when I had COPS events. Their new playset went up in the back yard today. That should occupy them for her. I couldn't get them off of it tonight. They love it. After bath Landon was asking if he could go out their when he wakes up and gets dressed.

I was looking at your picture on the nightstand next to my bed. Sometimes it still isn't real in my head. It still slaps me in the face that you are really gone...I heard this song the other day on the radio and cried all the way home. It is so what I feel these days....

You'll Be There - George Strait

Hope is an anchor and love is a ship, time is the ocean and life is a trip
You don't know where you're going, ‘till you know where you're at
And if you can't read the stars, well you better have a map
A compass and a conscience, so you don’t get lost at sea
Or on some lonely island, where no one wants to be

From the beginning of creation, I think our maker had a plan
For us to leave these shores and sail beyond the sand
And let the good light guide us through the waves and the wind
To the beaches in a world where we have never been
And we'll climb up on a mountain, y'all we'll let our voices ring
Those who've never tried it, they'll be the first to sing

Whoa, my, my
I'll see you on the other side
If I make it
And it might be a long hard ride
But I’m gonna take it
Sometimes it seems that I don’t have a prayer
Let the weather take me anywhere
But I know that I wanna go
Where the streets are gold
‘Cause you'll be there
Oh, my , my


You don’t bring nothing with you here
And you can’t take nothing back
I ain’t never seen a hearse, with a luggage rack
So I've torn my knees up prayin’
Scarred my back from fallin’ down
Spent so much time flying high, till I’m face first in the ground
So if you're up there watchin’ me, would you talk to God and say,
Tell him I might need a hand to see you both someday

Whoa, my, my
So I'll see you on the other side
If I make it
And it might be a long hard ride
But I’m gonna take it
Sometimes it seems that I don’t have a prayer
Let the weather take me anywhere
But I know that I wanna go
Where the streets are gold
‘Cause you'll be there
Oh, my , my
Cause you'll be there
Oh, my ,my


Loving and missing you as always. I know you'll be there with me flying high in the sky.

Sara

May 10, 2005

Brandy,
I look at the reflections left here on a daily basis, but I have never left one myself. Somehow I never felt it was my place. I just wanted to ask you to watch over your family and friends who are making their way to DC to honor you and the other fallen officers. I think about you, Sarah, and the boys on a daily basis. I pray that you help keep other officers, incuding my husband, safe as they make their way to work on a daily basis. Please watch over Sarah and the boys, like I am sure you are doing right now.

LEO Wife

May 9, 2005

Bran,
Mother's Day was good. Missy and Mom both made sure the boys bought me gifts and cards. We had a cookout at Missy's and the boys played in the yard. I got a chance to relax a little...Landon tried to give me Missy's roses and told me Happy Mother's Day. I took the boys up to spend the night with your parents. Then I rode the poker run route with Nascar and a few others. It was a relaxing day.

Last Mother's Day you came home after working midnight shift. You grabbed the boys and took them out shopping. You came home with a bouquet of flowers, a Kenny Chesney video, and a plant for the yard. I laughed myself silly when you said, "This bush will be perfect it only gets about six inches tall." I looked at the tag and said, "Bran that says six feet tall." But of course that is one of the things I loved most about you....You got in trouble my first mother's day...You didn't buy me anything and when I complained you said, "Well you're not my mother." I was on the phone with my sister faster than my fingers could dial. And your most famous Mother's Day moment. The first year we were dating you left a card on top of your dirty laundry at your Mom's house. I told you I couldn't believe you just did that. You told me she said she didn't want anything....You got better at that through the years....I always loved when you got me little gifts on these days. You always tried so hard to find that perfect little thing that you knew I would love and always had a little sparkle in your eyes watching to see if I was impressed. I got a little depressed when I was picking out Mother's Day cards...I saw all the ones "To My Wife on Mother's Day". I thought to myself I will never get another one of those cards. It made me so sad...one of those moments of realization of what my life is now. A life without you here to share with me, to share those special cards or moments.

We went to the policeman's ball Saturday in Newark. We all had a good time. It was funny to watch another department letting loose and having a good time. We were all discussing how every department is really the same family when it comes down to it. We were watching the "Isom" of the group and were saying look they have one too. That crazy guy that entertains everyone. I saw Katie and got to talk with her a little. She had totally forgotten that she and Mel were the ones that set us up on our first date. She told me that someone said it would be hard to let loose with the survivors coming to the ball. It is wierd how people view us differently, I don't know what they expect.... Katie said I don't know about the rest of them but Sara is a little wild woman. A little hill billy girl as Brian would say...Bran has himself a little woman there.

Good night dear. Loving and missing you as always.

Sara

May 8, 2005

Sara,
just thinking of you today and wishing you a happy mothers day

May 8, 2005

Brandy,

Today is Mother's Day and I know for sure that you will keep watch over and comfort those mom's that are special in your life. You have your mom, your mother-in-law, Missy and Sara to look after. If it weren't for you, Sara wouldn't have those two precious sons of yours and if it weren't for your mom, we wouldn't be honoring such a wonderful man here on ODMP. My thoughts are with all of you today.

Jennifer Aaron
Wife of Ofc. Duke G. Aaron, III (EOW 07/20/04)

May 8, 2005

Bran - Well it's the night before Logan's 2nd birthday. It's almost 11:00 and I am still up trying to get things ready for her party. I do this every year, up late making the cake and getting ready. We are having her party at the Zoo this year. I think the kids will have a good time. Just a small party, not like I normally do. I was just thinking about the few times that we went to the zoo together, I have some cute pictures of you on the carousel with Hayden. I was also thinking about the time we all took Hayden to Sea World. We had a good time together that day. I remember he fell asleep on your lap during the Shamu show. I have a really cute picture of that. Thank goodness for the memories. I hope Hayden can remember some of the good things. I know Logan won't but I will remind her and tell her how much you loved her. Every time you were around you would always come a pick her up and give her a good Uncle cuddle. Landon is so much like you in that aspect (well, every aspect) but anyway, he is always so nice and sweet to her. Tyler treats her like Sara and I treated each other as kids. Like she is his little pain in the butt sister, like I always did to Sara. Oh, well, one day she will have really hot friends that Tyler will be after so he'll be nice to her then. Speaking of the little monster, I watched them for a little last night and he was as rotten as could be. Then I had him for awhile today while Sara went to school with Landon and he was a little angel.

By the way, thanks for looking out for Hayden today, Maddie got away she ran all the way out into Rt. 31 and I thought for sure he was going to witness her getting flattened by a semi or something but she got into the road and just stopped (finally) and I picked her up. I just don't know what I would have done had he seen something like that. If you did help out, next time could you please not let her get so far? I thought I was going to join you after chasing her. I am soooo out of shape to be running like that. I bet you were up there laughing your butt off at me chasing her and screaming like the neighborhood idiot. What we wouldn't do for our kids huh?

We went to the state memorial yesterday. It was a very emotional, but wonderful tribute to Ohio's Fallen Officers. It truly shows the respect and admiration others have for the sacrifice that you made. I got a lot of really good pictures, I like having them to one day show all the kids what the memorial was the year that you were honored there. The boys came and were very good. We are now preparing to leave for DC. We leave Weds. morning. I made a big poster full of pictures for you and Hayden made a policeman picture and wrote "Uncle Brandy, I love you You are my Hero I miss you, Love Hayden" He made the policeman at school and Sara recommended I take it for Hayden, he loved the idea so I had it copied and will put it up down there. I hope you like it.

Well, I have some more birthday party stuff to do so I won't have to rush so much in the morning. I goofed off too much tonight and didn't get enough done, it was too nice outside to be in here doing this stuff. Watch over us at the party tomorrow, No Rain ok please? We will miss you there. Give Logan a big Uncle cuddle from Heaven.

Love you, Miss you.

Mis

Missy

May 6, 2005

I opened your reflections page tonight and my 4 year old son was behind me and he said, "Mommy, that looks like me and my daddy". I explained to him who you were and what happened. At least as much as a 4 year old could comprehend. I told him a really bad guy had taken you away from the ones you love. The first thing he thought of was when my car was stolen from our driveway and found burnt on a country road. His response was, "Mommy! He's the one that caught the bad guy who took your car. He is the big strong guy you told me about!" My response with tears in my eyes was, "Yes Bud, he's stronger than any one we know".
Sarah,
Landon and Brynden are only 2 months apart in age and the more I see that Brynden understands, the more I see what you face everyday. My prayers are with you and the boys and I pray that justice will be served. I know that Brandy is watching over you. He knows what you feel and what you both felt for each other. No one, including myself, can ever know what they would do or feel in a situation like yours. I am proud of who you are and every thing you do for our survivors in law enforcement. Stay strong Sara. Bran wouldn't know you any other way.

May 6, 2005

Brandy,

Put that arm around your mother and father as they make the big move into your old home. Alot is going on in honor of you and that is great. The boys are going to have so much to be proud of when they get older. Boy is Landon looking so much like you more and more as the days go buy, he was one the front page of the paper today scetching your name on paper and it just broke my heart, the little guy is a spitting image of his father. It's really hard going past the area of the accident just thinking, what the hell was he thinking when he took you away from all of us, I don't think he realizes what he is going to have to face for the rest of his life if he doesn't get the death penality.
Bran, if he does get the death penality and you see him up there in heaven(which i don't think he will make it up there)but get the best of him.
Brandy you are missed so much by all especially by the ones you touched most.
Take care and I will talk to you later.

Kasey

Kasey

May 6, 2005

Bran,
I thought I was so ready for DC but after the OPOTA memorial yesterday and all the emotion it evoked I know I am going to be exhausted in DC.

The boys came with me. They were very excited about all the horses, helicopters, and motorcycles. Landon has pretended he is a drummer in the bagpipe and drum corp since yesterday. He banged his drum outside yesterday afternoon. The neighbors were probably ready to kill us. This was the first memorial service that the boys have attended. Landon was confused. He thought we were going to see you. No matter how many times I explained it he was convinced you would be there.

I went with Landon today for Mother's Day activities at pre-school. It was fun. Landon really seems to enjoy pre-school. Your mom and my mom also came. Landon was so shy. The teacher said he is always shy but he follows all the directions and is always good. I know you would be proud. I know that father's day activities will be coming up. I dread the thought of that. I know that your dad will go with him but it just breaks my heart that our little guy doesn't have a daddy to take to school with him. It just isn't fair. He misses you so very much. I think he misses you more than anybody else ever could. Will that jerk ever know what he took from our sweet little boys.

Be with us in DC...I will have a few things together to leave for you. I saw the hawk several times in the last couple of days. I know that you are always watching us. We love you and miss you more than ever.

Sara

May 6, 2005

Bran,

Please be with all of us next week. It is going to be difficult. We sure do miss you.

Love,
LDub

Lindsey

May 6, 2005

I have viewed this page many times, but I haven't left any messages. I guess a part of me feels guilty for not making it to Ohio for Brandy's funeral because of my son being sick. It's been a long time since I've seen Brandy, but I remember the same happy, smiling guy so many have written about. As a matter of fact, I can't recall a time when I saw Brandy without a smile or just absolutely laughing hysterically. He sure had a great lease on life, and it's a shame that someone would take the away from him and his family. I am so sorry your boys will have to grow up without their father and his fine example of what a man should be. And I'm so sorry for Rick, Shirley and Cory. I have very fond memories of the close-knit family they always were, and I hate that an ignorant man would break that up.

I have never met you, Sara, but I pray for you and your boys all the time. Sometimes I feel guilty reading the postings on this site - almost like I'm intruding on other people's conversations. But I find it so comforting, and I can't stay away. It certainly isn't surprising that so many people have fond memories of Brandy. I hope you continue to find the strength to get through the rough times that lie ahead, and I'm glad that you have strong support from your family and friends to help you get through it. Keep up the great work - it sure sounds like you have two great little boys. I'm truly sorry for your loss.

Brandi
Old Friend

May 6, 2005

Brandy, Keep an eye out for all those traveling to DC to honor you. Keep them safe in their travels and give them comfort and peace in their hearts. Give them the strength and courage they will need to deal with everything that they will be exposed to. It will be very emotional for them but keep an arm around them and let them know everything will (eventually) be "ok".
To all those going to DC - be safe and my prayers are with you.

May 6, 2005

Please watch over your mom and dad. They love you so much. Times will be rough, so you need to look down on them and smile, and let them know you watching them.

anonymous

May 4, 2005

Brandy,
Please look over your mom and dad during this time of loss. As you already can see, they are STILL having a rough time with "everything". And also, please look over thoes beautiful boys of yours.
anonymouse

anonymous

May 3, 2005

Brandy,
Please look over your mom and dad during this time of loss. As you already can see, they are STILL having a rough time with "everything". And also, please look over thoes beautiful boys of yours.
anonymouse

anonymous

May 3, 2005

Bran,
I just thought...news I forgot to share. Monte Ray is finally getting married. He called a few weeks ago to tell me. He sent an invitation in the mail but I can't go. It is happening while we are in DC. I also got a letter from Haycox with some memories to share. They were of some really good times in Richwood. It made me smile and reflect on those times in Richwood. I will save it for my book for the boys. I hope more people send me memories for the book.

Speaking of DC I still need to put together stuff to leave at the wall for you. I have some good ideas of what I want to leave but need to get it all together. This week we honor you at the OPOTA memorial. Then the week after we go to DC. I know it will be emotional but I also can't wait to meet all the people I have connected with from other places. I know staying with Jenn I will meet a lot of people. She has connected with people from all over. Maybe that is why you and Duke brought us together...You knew I wasn't the social butterfly so you hooked me up with one. Jenn called to check on me after court the other day because she heard from my loud mouth sister how upset I was. It was nice to have an understanding voice checking in on me.

I was sick all day Saturday so Ty stayed with Mom and Landon stayed with Missy. Landon came home and ran in the door. He said, "Are you all better Mommy!!!" Like I said before he melts my heart everyday. He is such a sweet little boy. He cares so much about others. You would love it if you saw how sweet he is to little Logan. Tonight we went to Mis's house for dinner. He gave Logan a toy and said, "See Mommy I a good boy, I nice to Logan." We spent some time outside at Mom's house today. It is so relaxing there. We hunted mushrooms in the woods and the boys played on the swing set. We got on the "adult" swing. Landon did really well this year he wasn't scared at all. I couldn't help but think of last Memorial Day. It brought a big smile to my face. Mom had just put that swing up and we all took turns on it. We have pictures of you flying through the air with your T-shirt lifted showing one nipple. Everyone laughed when you tried to lift my big fat butt up on the swing and about fell over. Missy thought she broke her nose when she tried to keep Hayden from hitting the tree. We had a really good time that day.

We get Bacon back tomorrow. Luckily the fence is going up too. Hopefully he does better than at the old house. Only time will tell. The boys will be so happy to see him. I think Gabby will too. She has been rather lonely here without Bacon to pick on her. It has been quite without that big fat dog snoring all the time.

Rick came over tonight to help me with all those little things I haven't been brave enough to do myself. Mostly hanging the more diffcult stuff. Sometime in the next month he is going to help me organize the garage. I remember how you envied his handiwork. You tried to make your tool bench in the garage like his...it was a little rough but you were very proud of your work. I was really impressed with your work on the steps and the basement stairs. Sometimes I didn't realize how easily you picked that stuff up. When we first met you could barely use a hammer....okay maybe I am taking it a bit far.

Missy and I were talking today about October. I asked her what Rick said when he heard that you had died. It was wierd that I realized we had never talked about it until now. I don't know if it was just too painful or there was too much else on our minds. It is funny how we all remember it differently. She was telling me things that happened that I don't remember. Some things are stuck in my mind forever...more like burnt there like a scar. While others things I have no recollection of happening. We were talking about that Saturday after it happened where I insisted that everything had to be normal. I insisted that the boys would go to their first day of bowling and that I would drive. Lucky for us Mom insisted on riding with me. I don't know how I even made it there. When we got there Mom had to remind me to turn off the car. I don't even know how I was functioning at that point I hadn't ate or slept in days. Somehow I made it through those first few days....I never thought I would make it through these past six months without you but I have done it.....I miss you so much, love you.

Sara

May 1, 2005

Bran,
I am finally back online. It has been hard not having my outlet for the past couple of weeks. So much has happened in so little time.

The move went well. It is wierd to be happy about such a nice home that is perfect for the kids but sad and angry for leaving behind the home we built together. The boys love the new house. Landon started at his new school. He loves it. He gets to go 4 days a week now. He is doing really well. He packs his lunch everyday with a little help from Mommy. His first day, he got off the bus came walking in the door and said, "I'm home". He melts my heart everyday.

Your memorial room is amazing. I know I need to do some more work but you would love it. It is very comforting to be in this room. It has all the things you loved. It took you dying to get the Dale Jarrett stuff on the top floor of the house but it is finally here. (Sorry a little joke that made me smile).

The neighbors are all very nice. The word spread quickly about my situation. Several people have offered me help. They even wanted to build a fence for me. I had already hired someone to do it. I feel bad accepting any help. I am actually embarassed at times that I can't do everything myself.... It is very hard to ask for help for things that you really never had to ask for help with before. I would just give you my honey do list and eventually it would get done. I bought the boys a huge playset for the back yard. It should be here next week. I will probably never see Landon after it comes.

Landon is stuggling some. He misses you so much. He is really terrified that something will happen to me. He starts counseling the beginning of May. I hope that it helps him. They are going to try to help him process the images from the Emergency Room that night. He seems really stuck on those thoughts.

We have had two court appearances for the scumbag. They are so angering. I have to sit and listen. I feel so helpless and out of control. I have no control what happens to the person accused. Yesterday he requested a contact visit with his 1 year old child for a birthday. It was granted. I was so angry when I left. Our children wanted to see you on their birthdays too but they weren't given that consideration. Someone made that decision for them on October 14th. I was so mad when I left. I stopped at the cemetary and sat with you for awhile. I left one of your pins on the flag. I hope nobody takes it.

I picked up your video that I had done. I came home and cried myself silly watching it. I was exhausted after it was finally over.

Another Ohio officer joined you while I was waiting for internet. We all went to be with the family. From what I learned Larry was an amazing man. I am sure you met him at the gates of heaven and welcomed him to join you for a ride along in the streets of heaven. He had an amazing family, friends, and co-workers. His funeral reminded me a lot of yours. There were so many people there. The community is just as devastated as Marion was when you were murdered. It brings all those emotions to the surface. Once again I tried to honor your memory and let those left behind know that they will never walk alone in this journey. It is so healing to be able to do this. Someone stopped me and said, "Are you okay because I see you walking around here making sure everyone else is okay but this is so new for you." All I could say is this is what I do now. I have to do it. I don't know how to explain it. It is the only way I feel I can continue to honor everything that you stood for. I looked for the hawk at the cemetary. As we were walking up I said to Pam and Krissy, "Where is the hawk?" I started scanning the trees. Pam said, "Right there" I looked over and there was a headstone with the last name Hawk. I knew you would send me the sign somehow.

Today I have been so angry. Probably all the emotional stuff that has happened...another funeral, court, moving, watching the video.... I just know I can't let this anger consume my life. I have to channel it into positive outlets. The next month is going to be so hard. Stay with us and keep us strong.

Tyler needs Mommy's attention. I must be going. Loving you and missing you as much as ever.

Sara Winfield

April 29, 2005

This week our Department buried one of its own for the first time in many years. I know he is up there with you and you are showing him the ropes and for that I thank you. I would also like to thank you for Sara. She has become an active member in C.O.P.S. and is helping others. I watched her at the funeral for Ofc. Larry Cox and she was running around trying to easy our pain. However you could see in her eyes that she was reliving the "Hell" that she lived through when she had to bury you. I asked her how she was holding up and she said she was alright and this was what she did now. I could see the hurt in her eyes and knew the reason she did it was for you, but I could also see she was a strong and independent women. Brandy you picked a wonder wife and a great mother. You will live on through her.

Ofc. J.M. Robinson
Chillicothe PD

April 29, 2005

I have read Brandy WINFIELD'S reflections a number of times. It is obvious the number of lives that you have touched and even being a Police Officer in Australia it is obvious that the brotherhood is strong world-wide.

My thoughts go to Sara in her troubled times and I pray that God gives you the strength to carry on.

Brandy, thank you for you contribution to Policing world-wide.

God Bless.

S.J. WEBER

Det Senior Constable
Queensland Police

April 25, 2005

Brandy- I had a friend that came to walk the streets up there with you today. His name is Larry Cox. He was killed on Thursday and it hasnt been the same in our little community since. If you get a chance to look him up we would surely appreciate it.

Sara- I know that you came to meet Teresa. I asked if you had been there yet and she said that you were there. Please help her and keep her going if you can. I know that you know the true pain that she feels and Im not sure any of us do. By the way, thanks for being so strong and being so courteous to the other "wives" in their time of need. Thanks. From all of Larry and Teresa's friends.

Heather
Ross County Sheriff Department

April 25, 2005

Bran
Just got back from the Spring Football Game and wanted to talk to you and let you know that those two beautiful babies of yours had a really great time. All of my babies did but you know who loved it the most. Yes Landon was so excited to watch the Buckeyes out on the field. He ask me to let him go out and play with them. Of course he had to take a football with him. We had to take Logan and Tyler back to the van early cause it was so cold this year. I told Mike this morning I thought it was cold and rainy cause you were sad that you couldn't be with us this year. You looked so forward to going to that Spring football game every year. Sara has a picture by her computer of you at one of the spring games with the scoreboard in the background and I think it is so cool. It has been a depressing week with another Ohio officer being murdered and it is just like reliving the whole terrible nightmare again. Sara is going to go be with the family tomorrow. You would be so proud of the way she has supported others that have to start the journey that she is traveling now. She is a very strong girl as you already know and I might add that I don't know which one of you was more stubborn. Remember that we all love and miss you more every day and today we wanted nothing more than you to be with all of us. Know you were there in our hearts all the way. By the way the Buckeyes won!!
Love ya Johnna Your Mother-in-law

Johnna

April 23, 2005