Family, Friends & Fellow Officers Remember...

Deputy Sheriff Brandy Lyn Winfield

Marion County Sheriff's Department, Ohio

End of Watch Thursday, October 14, 2004

Leave a Reflection

Reflections for Deputy Sheriff Brandy Lyn Winfield

Sara
Just wanted to let you know I am thinking of you. Thanks for the talks and the laughs we have shared you and Jen cont to amaze me. Thanks for everything you are such a wonderful person I know that Bran is watching over you and happy with everything EVERYTHING your doing. Your doing wonderful with the boys bran I know is happy with everything you do. Take care sweetie your in my thoughts and prayers sweetie. Thanks for everything.
Love Kate

Katie

July 7, 2005

Brandy

I saw your brother and mom at the Marion fair this year. Boy do those boys look a lot like you. It sure seemed like they were having fun there. Your brother sure does seem like a proud uncle of those two. Keep an eye on them everyday and know that not a day goes by that you and your family is not in all of our prayers.

July 6, 2005

Brandy,

As your family sat and watched fireworks this first 4th of July without you, I am sure that you were with them the entire time. Please continue to keep watch over all of them. I know your 30th birthday is coming up in a couple of weeks. My Duke's birthday is tomorrow. Your and Duke's 30th birthdays should have been a mile stone for the both of you. It saddens me to know that the both of you won't be getting those surprise birthday parties like I was going to have for Duke and apparently Sara was going to have for you. Though the years will go on, you both will forever be 29 in our hearts and in our memories. Continue to keep watch from above.

Sara sweetie, I didn't see a thing :) But on a serious note, continue to keep strong and give Landon and Tyler a big hug for me. Your strength is truly an inspiration to me. Thank you for all that you, Missy and mom have done for me for almost nine months now. I know we will make it through these nightmare's we have all endured.

Love,
Jenn

Jennifer Aaron
Wife of Ofc. Duke G. Aaron, III (EOW 07/20/04)

July 4, 2005

Bran,
Happy 4th. It is not the same without you here. Of course nothing is the same without you here. The boys went to your parent's house yesterday. When I told them in the morning they were going boating with Pa and Nana they were both so excited that I couldn't contain them. They kept going out and getting in the car before we were ready. Finally I called your Dad and told him I would just bring them all the way to Marion instead of meeting them. They are staying there tonight to watch fireworks. Your Dad said he was going to let off some bottle rockets he found in the garage that you had. I had to smile and say yep ones that he confiscated from people on previous years.....(Jenn if you read this pretend you didn't see that honey, I know it is probably just killing you that we do illegal fireworks and all)

We went up to Marge's cabin at Indian Lake the other night. The boys had a great time. When the fireworks started I thought Landon was going to explode himself because he was so happy. He hugged me everytime one went off and jumped up and down. He reminded me so much of you. When we got back we made smores in a fire. He really looked like you with marshmellow all over his face. Ty tried to steal the whole bag of marshmellows for himself. Like father like son I guess.

I bought Landon all his stuff for T-ball. It starts this month. We got him a new glove, some real balls, a new helmet, and new baseball pants. Ty Ty had to have a new glove too. You would be proud he is knocking the ball half way across the yard now too. Landon is starting to play catch now. He is always asking me to come out and throw the ball with him. He has a great throw now and is starting to aim better too. At times it scares me to catch those balls that he wings at me. Landon just had to have the really cool red helmet, too. It came with little letters you can put his name on it with. Something I know you would have loved. T-ball just won't be the same not seeing you standing out on that field trying to get Landon to hold still and not kick the dirt. And seeing how proud you were to be out there with him. He really wants you to be his coach this year. I told him you will watch from heaven with a beaming smile on your face. I hope I can get through the first game without bawling.

Missing you very much today. Love you.

Sara

July 4, 2005

Hey, buddy. Just wanted to let you know that I finally made myself go see your headstone today. It is truly amazing, it is like standing there talking directly to you. The artist did a great job on your picture, the poem on the back was amazing too. I stood there for probably 10 minutes or so and managed to get a lot out. As good as the headstone is, it also made things kinda final in my mind, in situations where someone close to me passes away, it's the viewing of the headstone that usually finalizes things for me. Truthfully, I think that's why I avoided going until now. Today I had to admit to myself that you're gone and nothing short of the hand of God Himself can change that.
I wish we'd have had a few more good times together, buddy, but the ones we did have are enough.
I'll probably come back to see you when I get opportunities to do so. The first time (today) was the hardest. We all miss you, U-6.

M.C.
Dublin, OH

July 3, 2005

Hey Brandy,

We just want to wish you a Happy Fourth Of July! I know were early, but we are gonna be busy all weekend. Keep watch over your loved ones and keep them safe this holiday weekend.

Keep smiling down......

Ryan & Amy Caldwell

July 1, 2005

"Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself."

Sara, thank you for not being a victim. Thank you for not allowing Brandy's death to destroy you. That's not what he would have wanted. He loved you and he will continue to love you from heaven. Brandy's death turned you and your sons' lives upside down. You have lost the man you loved and your children lost their wonderful father. Unfortunately we cannot turn back time. Anyone that has suffered a sudden loss knows your pain. Sometimes you must wrap that pain deep inside yourself to get through the days. Its hard because you lived a quiet life and now your life is up for public opinion and scrutiny, when all you are trying to do is hold on to as much hope and happiness that you can muster. Just know that you are LOVED. As well as Brandy's parents, brother, and his cute little boys. Carry on, Sara. Your reflections, your involvement, and your love for your kids have shown us all that you are such a strong, wonderful person.

"I learned that it is the weak who are cruel, and that gentleness is to be expected only from the strong."

July 1, 2005

Bran,
July already, it doesn't seem possible. The boys spent most of this week at your parents house. They took them to the fair. Your mom said they had a wonderful time. I couldn't bring myself to go this year. We always went together after you got done working your detail there. You signed up for everyday possible to make that extra buck or two. When we went together you had to have 2 things.... a steak sandwich and that thing with powdered sugar all over it. You would have your lips covered in powdered sugar. I am picking the boys up today. Missy and I are taking them to watch Red, White, and Boom. We are going to Indian Lake on Saturday to watch more fireworks at Aunt Marge's house. Your parents asked to have them on the 4th so I am taking them up to Marion then. Your Mom and Dad really enjoy the time with them. Landon will start school again soon so I am trying to let your parent's have them as much as possible during his break from school.

I think last year is the first 4th of July that you didn't have to work. We got some good pictures of Landon and you at the fireworks. You usually came over in your uniform to watch with us. And you always came home with confiscated fireworks in the trunk of your cruiser. That somehow ended up in our garage....

I rememeber last year it was close to the 4th when you had that explosion call that you got called in for. A couple of people were killed and I remember how worried I was when you ran out the door. All I knew is you were responding to an explosion and I was so afraid you would get hurt. I spent half the night listening to the scanner. Ironic that I worried so much that night because I knew you were on a dangerous call...yet the night you were murdered I never thought twice when you walked out the door. It was just another night. Love you see you in the morning. I went to sleep and wasn't worried if I would see you in the morning. I guess I just got used to sending you out the door everynight and thinking you would be safe. I worried so much about an explosion call yet you got killed assisting a disabled motorist..giving someone a ride. I would have never worried if someone said, "He's giving a man a ride from a disabled." I still struggle with that. That you died just being a nice guy. I still question what exactly happened that night.

Your birthday is coming up. I sent your Mom flowers that were supposed to be delivered on your birthday. She got them yesterday....oh well. Maybe I'll just send some more on your birthday anyways. You would have been the big 30. You always complained about getting older....I was going to have a suprise birthday party for you. Last year at Missy's 30th party she kept teasing you that you would be joining her next year big boy.....We got a great picture of that night too. You and Rick...you have your arm around him messing around and he has on your cowboy hat. You both have great smiles on your face. That was just a few weeks before you died.

I found another song that speaks right to my heart.....

Leann Rimes
(written by John Kennedy, Tammi Kidd)

Probably Wouldn't Be This Way

Got a date a week from Friday with the preacher's son
Everybody says he's crazy, I'll have to see

I finally moved to Jackson when the summer came
I won't have to pay that boy to rake my leaves

I'm probably going on and on
It seems I'm doing more of that these days

I probably wouldn't be this way
I probably wouldn't hurt so bad
I never pictured every minute without you in it
You left so fast
Sometimes I see you standing there
Sometimes it's like I'm losing touch

Sometimes I feel like I'm lucky to have
Had the chance to love this much
God give me a moment's grace
'cause if I'd never seen your face
I probably wouldn't be this way

Mama says that I just shouldn't speak to you
Susan says that I should just move on

You oughta' see the way these people look at me
When they see me 'round here talking to this stone

Everybody thinks I've lost my mind
But I just take it day by day

I probably wouldn't be this way
I probably wouldn't hurt so bad
I never pictured every minute wihtout you in it
You left so fast
Sometimes I see you standing there
I feel an angel's touch

Got a date a week from Friday
with the preacher's son
Everybody say's I'm crazy, guess I'll have to see



This song really made me reflect.
Nobody knows what it is like to walk in my shoes unless they have been here. It is a stuggle everyday. I question every decision I make...But most of all I am happy that I had the few short years with you that I did and that I have our two precious babies. I guess things happen that change and mold our lives. We can accept that and try to rebuild or we can let it overcome us and ruin our lives. I know you wouldn't want me to let it overcome me. I have to move forward in this life without you. I didn't choose to do this somebody made that choice for me. I wanted to spend every minute of the rest of my life with you. I just wasn't given that opportunity......I probably wouldn't be this way if you were still here, or if I never met you, or....but I am this way and I have to live this life no matter how hard it is.

Missing you as much as ever. Love you.

Sara

July 1, 2005

Brandy, May you look out for the ones who love you! You may not be here in person, but you can still see all the good and bad. Give your mom and dad an extra hug tonight. And for the boys, an extra kiss!

June 30, 2005

For all who love Brandy...

God, give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.


Sometimes it's hard to get past our own sadness and anger, especially in times of mourning. Let's all pray for patience and compassion.

June 30, 2005

Bran - Just want to say Hi - Missing you a whole bunch lately. Life has changed so much since you've left. The kids are all getting big. Landon has a great farmer's tan going on right now - makes him look even more like you. Ty's hair has turned almost white because of the sun. I went to Sara's the other day and looked outside and Landon had taken all his clothes off and was playing on the swingset buck naked. That comes from your lovely wife. She always did that when she was little. I was always going inside to tell mom Sara was naked again. I told on Landon too!! Well I will keep it short and sweet today, just wanted to let you know your always on my mind. Almost 9 months have passed already and I think of all the things we all would have been doing during that time and think this just sucks. The fair is going on in Marion right now - will never forget when we came up there 2 yrs ago and went with you guys - we had so much fun. Miss you, love you

Mis

missy

June 29, 2005

Sara, Tyler and Landon: Please know that the community thinks of you daily and we know the loss you have and feel is so great. Brandy was a great man and Sara, please know that he still loves you and knows you are doing everything you can to get by without him here. NOONE knows what you go through without him here.

June 29, 2005

Landon, Tyler, Rick, Shirley, Cory,
I just wanted to let you know I am thinking of you today, and I hope the days are getting easier for you. We are proud to have known your wonderful father, son, brother.

June 27, 2005

Bran,
We went to the COPS picnic today. The boys had a lot of fun. Linda got the hose out and let the kids run through it. Tyler was cracking me up soaking wet and running full speed through the water. Landon took a while to warm up to the other kids but finally played.

I had a wonderful time. It is so great to spend time with everyone. Also to see smiles on everyone's faces and know that life can still be good after all we have been through. I met some new people today that I had not met before. At times I feel so awkward in crowds of people. But I did talk to quite a few people. I guess I am just better at writing things out than I am at talking with other people about it. I am getting better at it though. But of course you know all that.

At one point I realized Tyler wasn't anywhere around. I started to look for him and saw a couple walking over towards us with him. They found him in the bathroom when they were looking for their lost daughter. I had taken Landon in to go to the bathroom. Tyler must have went in to look for me and couldn't get the door open to let himself out. I felt horrible. When I picked him up he wasn't crying anymore but he looked at me and said, "I just want my binky".

We went over to Mark and Angie's after the picnic. The boys got to swim and play with all the other kids. Tyler is such a daredevil that it scares me. I was holding him in the pool and he kept throwing his head back so he could go under the water. Landon was my usual little wimp...wouldn't get in the water but wanted to and wouldn't let me help him at all.....

Both the boys are tucked tight into bed fast alseep. They had such a big day. Hopefully they sleep in some in the morning because I am exhausted. On that note I am off to get some much needed rest.

Love you dear missing you as much as ever.



Sara

June 26, 2005

Sara,
I just wanted to stop in and say hello.. You don't know me, and I don't know your family.. But I stop in here daily, to check on you and the boys as everyone I think does… Your strength is definitely a inspiration to me to send my husband on the road everyday. I know that if something bad happens, it is possible to get through it. And I know this because of you. I just want to say that I hope that this coming year brings you happiness in your new house, and those boys of yours give you more joy everyday. You don't know how many people you touch because of your strength. You are truly admired.
Many kind thoughts..
An old lady that checks in..

Just a friend

June 25, 2005

Bran,
I got your curio cabinet done. It is all the stuff you cherished and some new awards that you have received. I still have some work to do in your room but it is almost complete. It almost does you as much honor as your headstone. I get a lot of comfort from this room. I look at your pictures on the wall and blow them kisses everytime I leave this room.

I found your OSU car flag. It was in the boxes of stuff in the garage. I am thinking of taking it up to the cemetary to leave for you. I never found the DJ one. I remember when you had to retrieve that flag from along the road. Landon rolled the window down after you had taken off. Your flag came flying off the car. The new car has locks so he can't roll the windows down like that anymore.

I got the garage all cleaned out and the sandbox done for the boys. Rick had to help me out with the sandbox. I was going to do it myself but it needed some plywood along the edges to hold all the sand in. If I had tried myself all the sand would have poured out the edges and then I would have had a real mess. I still haven't put the trampoline together yet. A project for another day. I am going to pick up the boys. They spent a couple of night with your parents. Your Dad bought a Harley. Your mom was telling me all about it when I dropped the boys off. I am betting they got some rides on it. I always complained when he did that on the old bike but I guess I need to lighten up. He is just having fun with them.

Landon was so excited when I told him he was going to Nana and Pa's house the other day. I went upstairs to get Ty's clothes. When I came back down Landon was gone. I opened the garage door to look for him and the overhead door was open. I started yelling for him and couldn't find him. Tyler and I searched the whole house yelling his name. I talked to the neighbors to see if they saw him. I was just about to call the police department. I turned around and he was sitting in the car with his seatbelt on ready to go to Pa and Nana's. The whole time I yelled for him he never said a word. It scared me sooo bad.

I went to Bingo last night with Aunt Marilyn. I got a Bingo for the first time. I won some money. It was fun. It is a good way to get out of the house some. I don't care much for the nightlife for people my age. But you know that. I'd rather hang out with the old woman at Bingo.....Stop laughing at me because I know you are.

Missing you as much as ever. Love you dear.

Sara

June 24, 2005

Bran,
We've been keeping really busy. The balloons on Father's Day were a great idea. Landon and Tyler both loved it. They told me you were going to catch the balloons in heaven.

We have been on the go to keep these two little guys busy. When we are at home they are in the backyard on the playset. We hook the sprinkler up and put it down the edge of the slide. Watching those two fly down the wet slide at top speed is comical. Landon gets up before me most mornings now and doesn't wake me up. Yesterday I found him in the backyard butt naked playing. They are both growing so much and doing so many new things. It is so sad and heartbreaking that you're not here to see it all.

People keep asking me if I am going to go back to work. I have decided to stay home at least until they are both in school. Then I might go back to school myself.

We went to Marilyn's again yesterday. The fish were biting more and we caught several. Landon went up to the pool to swim with Marilyn. He flipped his inter-tube over and Marilyn had to jump in after him. She said he did a really good job keeping himself above water until she got to him. He was really scared but proud of himself later. He keeps telling me he wants to tell everyone that he went under the water.

I have been dreaming about you a lot lately. I don't usually dream about you or I don't remember if I do. I don't remember dreams that often anyway. One was very vivid. You came back to us and we were all holding each other. It was so real it was scary. I woke up and felt terrible for two days because I was missing you so much. Then when I woke up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom I turned around and swore that you were standing behind me. I actually jumped. You used to do that to me all the time. You would be alseep and I would be watching TV. You would get up and I wouldn't hear you. You would scare me when you said something because I didn't know you were standing there.

Then you would talk in your sleep sometimes. That always cracked me up because you had full conversations with people. I would talk to you back and then you would get mad and say, "Sara, stop making fun of me" You still weren't even awake. During allergy season you would rub your nose all night and have a big mark on it in the morning. All night I could hear you rubbing your nose.

Gabby really misses you. After you died she used to wait by the door for you to come home. The other night she got in bed with me and just nuzzled up next to me. I still don't think she likes me too well but I think she is getting better.

Well the boys are in the backyard playing and I need to go check on them. I think I am going to take them up to spend the night at your parents so I can get a few projects done. I want to get the curio cabinet filled up with all the awards. I also need to finish the sandbox in the backyard. I am going to do it myself out of pure stubborn Sara attitude. I also bought a trampoline because Ty loves Missy's so much. I will need help with that though. We'll see how long the first emergency room trip takes for this new toy.

Love you and miss you very much.

Sara

June 22, 2005

Brandy I dont know if you had anything to do with it or not, but yesterday as I was dispatching units to every end of the county, I looked out the window and low and behold, a hawk flew right into the tree. If you did have something to do with it, THANKS. I thought of you the rest of my shift and I did muster a smile.

I met your wife at Larry Cox's funeral, you should be so very proud of her, she is unbelievable. I met her and felt like I already knew her. You see, I read your reflections everyday and I cry right along with her.

Anyway, I just wanted to say thanks I really needed some help to pull thru that shift and the hawk did it for me. You're the best.

Heather
Chillicothe

June 22, 2005

Officer Winfield, Just wanted to wish you a Happy Fathers Day. Watch over your family and the rest of us trying to do this damn job. Rest in Peace Brother

Detective First Grade Robert F. Jackson
Metropolitan Police Department Washington DC/Homicide Branch

June 21, 2005

Happy Father's Day Brandy. My thoughts and prayers were with you, Landon, & Tyler all day yesterday. Give them some angel hugs & kisses.

LEO Wife

June 20, 2005

Brandy,
I stopped by the cemetary today to tell you Happy Father's Day but it was really busy and I think the boys were there. Just wanted to let you know I was thinking of you on this very special day. Make sure you give your dad a special thought today, he misses you so much. We miss you.

June 19, 2005

Bran, I just wanted to tell you Happy Father's Day and hey give you father an extra couple of angel kisses and hugges.

Always thinking of you,
Love Ya
Kasey

Kasey Williamson

June 19, 2005

Brandy,

Today is Father's Day. Please give Landon and Tyler an extra special angel hug and kiss today. I usually don't like to say the word happy on holidays anymore because there is no happy goin on, but Happy Father's Day to you. You are and always will be a wonderful and special dad to them boys and through memories, they will always remember that about their daddy.

Jenn

Jennifer Aaron
Wife of Ofc. Duke G. Aaron, III (EOW 07/20/04)

June 19, 2005

Bran,
Happy Father's Day in heaven. I wish the boys could spend the day with you. They miss you so much. Landon made you something at school. We are going to take it up to the cemetary today. We are also getting some balloons to take up. We are each going to attach a note and let it off in the sky so it can float up to heaven and you will get your fathers day gift. I think the boys will really like that.

I took the boys to the Outer Banks of North Carolina for the week. They loved it. We never got to take the boys on a big vacation. They saw the ocean, lighthouses, rode on a boat, and played on the beach. They had a lot of fun. Landon really loved the lighthouses. He wants to see more lighthouses. I think I will take him up to Lake Erie some weekend to show him some more lighthouses. We all missed having you there to share it with us.

Well it's early and I need to get the boys ready for today. We still need to go buy balloons.

Loving and missing you as much as ever.

Sara

June 19, 2005

Happy Fathers Day Brandy! Give those little boys big angel hugs.

Amy Caldwell
HS Classmate

June 18, 2005

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