Marion County Sheriff's Department, Ohio
End of Watch Thursday, October 14, 2004
Reflections for Deputy Sheriff Brandy Lyn Winfield
Well Bran, The 2nd annual poker run has come and gone. I prayed and prayed friday night that it would not rain and well you kept us from getting wet you are the man I'm sure you had plenty of good laughs that day. I mean really who would not think it was funny when Dan and Mike sat me in a mud puddle and then Dan put me in a troff of ice,beer and water.That was a laugh all in it's self until then of course Lindsey and I get on stage and dance and sing just for you. Oh never the less throw beads for everyone. We were singing the famous O H I O song just for you. I love and miss you everyday. Bran you sure have had alot of complements for everything you have every done. Your Great Man We love you!!!!!
Manda
P.S You know I bought a bike for myself just for these poker runs and guess what I was to chicken to ride myself this year there were alot of bikes. funny uh!!!!!!!
June 7, 2006
Bran,
Well I think that I am finally recovered from yesterday. Did you see all of us, man I was incredible all the bikes. You probably were laughing at me like you always did when I would do something new. I had to cry when we were all mounting up on the bike to pull out at noon because the feeling of inspiration and the love that people have for you is just amazing. I didn't get to take as many pictures this year as I did last but I did get some good ones. You should be so proud of your self, I tell you those boys love you like you are still here everyday, man Landon is going to me in trouble when he gets older because you two are a spitting image of each other. It just kills me when I see him because I see everything of you in him. So how did you like your beer, was that nice or what. You have to admit Nascar and his help did an awesome job putting this together for you. Well hey it's getting late but I wanted to tell you that I love ya brother and miss you so much.
Talk to ya soon
Kasey
Kasey Williamson
June 4, 2006
Brandy,
Today I was on my way home from work when this HUGE line two by two line of motorcycles started coming from the opposite direction. I then remembered that it was your poker run. I pulled over on the side of the road and just watched as they passed by, giving some of them the thumbs up, waving at some, and just a smile for others. I had tears in my eyes the whole time thinking about all the people that showed up for the event. Although I did not personally know you or any of your family, you will never be forgotten. I wish I could have been one of the motorcyclists out there today, but I had to work, and my bike is in the shop right now. I hope to be there next year. Thank you, Brandy, for the sacrifice you made.
June 3, 2006
Hey Brandy- keep everyone safe today on the run and especially watch over your mom and dad, Cory and Lindsey. I know that these things can be really hard on them. Let them have a little fun on their new bikes and enjoy themselves! You are missed so much!
A Friend
June 3, 2006
Sara,
I have tried many times to leave a reflection to yourself and Brandy..never to actually submit it. You see I did not want to intrude upon your discussions with Brandy.
But I feel that I need to let you know that I think so highly of you, for taking such a tragedy and using it to help others.
My Mother always told me to take what is given you and use it to help others..no mater what that is...my Mother passed away recently and it made me think of you, and how you have continued on. Yes, I know the pain is different, but it is still that same devestation.
So although I am not affiiated with ODMP...I want you to know that you have helped me, an ordinary mom from Georgia, and I hope I can live up to my mothers command to "help others"...as you have done.
And Brandy, I so wish that you were here to see all the good Sara has done..Simply put, You are a hero and you are not forgotten.
May 30, 2006
Sara,
You don't know me, but I'll never forget the day that I heard about Brandy. It killed me to hear of the circumstances and the family he left behind, it is so unfair. Anyways, I've read some of your reflections and took notice on the one about the horse therapy, I've been involved in horses my whole life and that is a wonderful idea. I hope you've had luck contacting someone in that respect. If not, I put my email on the leave a reflection page. I don't know if you can get my email address from that or not. I can at least put you in touch with someone if need be. Don't give up on that idea, I think it would be very good for the boys. I just wanted to say that I have no idea what you have gone through in the past year and a half, but I completely admire you for continuing to move forward and your plight to help other officers' families. As a central Ohio dispatcher, I have gone through the loss of an officer killed in the line of duty and it was and still is heartbreaking and emotional to me, especially seeing the families of these hero officers complete and utter devastation. I've read reflections(and cried)often and I think hearing about how you and the rest of the families have emerged from tragedy has helped many deal with the loss of their officer friends, and co workers. So THANK YOU, for all you've done and I wish you and yours the best of luck in all you do. I pray for you and your family often!!
Thank-you Brandy for your sacrifice, you will always be remembered!!
Anonymous
LE Dispatcher
May 28, 2006
Bran - All right, last time I asked for the weather at the Spring Game to be good and it was nice and hot - the 10 day weather forecast for the Poker Run is looking shaky. We need you to clear it up for us. Help us out with a wonderful warm safe day. We need a good day of fun for this run so help us out please. Miss you.
Missy
Missy
May 26, 2006
Bran- Your poker run is coming up soon..make sure they are all safe. Your mom & dad will look GREAT on the New Harley!! We still miss you and talk about you almost everyday. You will always be in our hearts!!
May 26, 2006
Been thinking alot about you this past week. Can't believe everything that has happened over the past year since we were all in DC. You are missed everyday Brandy.
A friend
May 18, 2006
Still another day missing you and thinking of your family - especially Landon and Tyler. You are in our thoughts every single day.
May 18, 2006
You don't know me nor has any of your family members met me but I was a senior in highschool the day you lost your life protecting the residents of Marion. Because of your ultimate sacrifice and hearing how people praised you and your accomplishments, it made me consider a career in law enforcement. I joined the military as a member of the police force for the Navy, and everyday I think about how you are watching over all of us in the field and being each and every one of our guardian angels!
MASA Emily Harbolt
US Navy
May 17, 2006
Happy Mother's Day Sara, Mom and Missy.
Love,
Jenn
May 14, 2006
for the six years that you worked on marion county sheriff's department i am sure you made alot of friend may you always be remembered by all those friends and neighbor may you rest in peace.
Deputy Sheriff Brandy Lyn Winfield.
Cadet Perkins
WPD
May 10, 2006
The cry of the city like a siren's song
Wailing over the rooftops the whole night long
Saw a shooting star like a diamond in the sky
Must be someone's soul passing by
These are the streets
Where we used to run where your Papa's from
These are the days
Where you become what you become
These are the streets
Where the story's told
The truth unfolds
Darkness settles in
Shine your light down on me
Lift me up so I can see
Shine your light when you're gone
Give me the strength
To carry on, carry on
Don't wanna be a hero
Just an everyday man
Trying to do the job the very best he can
But now it's like living on borrowed time
Out on the rim, over the line
Always tempting fate like a game of chance
Never wanna stick around to the very last dance
Sometimes I stumble and take a hard fall
Loose(?) hold your grip off the wall
Shine your light down on me
Lift me up so I can see
Shine your light when you're gone
Give me the strength to carry on
Carry on
I thought I saw him walking by the side of the road
Maybe trying to find his way home
He's here but not here
He's gone but not gone
Just hope he knows if I get lost
Shine your light down on me
Lift me up so I can see
Shine your light when you're gone
Give me the strength to carry on
Carry on
May 8, 2006
Sara, I heard a beautiful song called Shine your light down on me, it reminds me of all police officers that have died in the line of duty. Listen to the words I think you will love it!
May 7, 2006
Hey Bran, havent talked to you in a while so I just wanted to say Hello and I miss ya so much. I started taking online classes to get my criminal justice degree, you would be so proud of me. I could use your help alot of the time but I just get stuck sometimes. Just a couple of week and the poker run is here. I can't wait. Well got to get back to work. Love ya
Kasey
Kasey Williamson
May 1, 2006
Deputy Brandy Winfield,
You have no idea who I am, but I had the privilege of meeting your wife for the first time yesterday, April 27, 2006. She graciously traveled two hours to speak at a Victims' Rights Week Luncheon in Coshocton County. I was referred to her by a representative of the Attorney General's Office who heard her speak at an event and she spoke very highly of Sara. I honestly didn't think she would be interested in coming to such a small town, so far away, to speak at our luncheon. I was really excited when she accepted the invitation, and I couldn't wait to meet her. I had only spoken to her on the phone a few times to get all the details figured out for the luncheon, but something in my gut told me that I would be moved by her speech. It is now the day after meeting and hearing Sara speak, and I am still moved. I have spent the last half-hour reading all of the reflections on this website and I honestly can't stop crying. Sara is a strong, powerful, inspiring "Survivor"....I am truly honored to have met her and Sara..if you are reading this...I hope to keep in touch with you. Brandy--you have left behind a woman who has changed people's lives. She has been through so much and yet she dedicates her life to helping others. I can't even put my hands around the idea of losing my soulmate. Sara..keep doing what you do... You are an inspiration and I wish you the best of luck in life. I wish I would've had the privilege of meeting you Brandy. I guess in a way...I have met you through Sara. Thank you Sara for opening my eyes to your world.
Sincerely,
Emily Kobel
Coshocton County Victim/Witness Coordinator
Emily Kobel
Coshocton County Victim/Witness Coordinator
April 28, 2006
Bran,
We went to the zoo again today. We explored the part we missed last time. The boys were so good and we had a blast. The gorilla's were picking their nose and eating it. Which Landon found hilarous, he keeps doing it now because he thinks it is funny. IT is so GROSS!!!
Landon had t-ball practice tonight. He is doing so well. He is catching the ball now. He doesn't get it every time but he does pretty well. He still has a hard time paying attention when he is in the field. He gets distracted by all the other kids. Sometimes I see him mimic their behavior. He is going to be such an amazing ball player. I need to work with him on being a team player though....he wants it to be all about him. He doesn't want any other kids to hit or get the ball. I know that will come with age. Tonight he had to potty again. Once he got off the field he announced he was quitting t-ball and started crying. I was floored because he was having so much fun. I asked why, what was going on. He never did say. I am not sure if he just misses you when he plays ball or if he was mad because he wasn't batting. It is so hard to tell sometimes. I didn't ask about you there because I didn't want him to make excuses. I just told him he really likes t-ball and Mommy wasn't going to let him quit. When we got home I asked if he misses you when he plays t-ball. He said yes. I said is that why you wanted to quit. He didn't really say. I told him that we can't quit things just because we miss Daddy. That Daddy would want us to be happy and keep doing the things we all love. I pointed out that Mommy never gave up after Daddy died. That we can't give up just because we miss Daddy but it is okay to be sad and miss Daddy. He smiled, I hope he understood. He said he was glad he didn't quit. He has a really awesome coach this year. I really like the approach he takes with the kids, you can tell he is really interested in doing this and just didn't get conned into doing it because his kid was on the team.
I am finally starting to feel comfortable as a stay at home mom. I have struggled with depression and how to fufill this new role in my life. It was so different than what I was used to doing. I have stopped worrying so much about everything and started enjoying life more. I constantly worried about doing things right and everything. I have just started enjoying it and I find the boys are so much easier to deal with. We have worked a lot in counseling with my parenting techniques. It changes so much when you become a single parent. You never realize how much you rely on the other parent until they are gone. I never expected to be doing this alone. It wasn't in the plan we had for our life, I guess it never is when you decide to have a baby. It has taken me a while and I know I have had a hard time at times but I think we are finally starting to settle into our new lives. I know there will be bumps along the way, but I really think we are through the roughest parts.
I found out Landon will be doing all day Kindergarten on a rotating day schedule. That should be interesting. I was a little bummed because he currently goes to school 4 days a week. But I tried to look on the bright side and he will get a few days home alone with me while Ty is at school. I think that will help with the competition the two have for my attention. We still struggle in that area some. Tyler really knows how to push Landon's buttons. When Landon tries to tell me a story Tyler will always interrupt him. It really gets to Landon.
Tyler has been so rotten. I don't know if 3 is worse than 2. I can't remember when Landon was the worst.....But I can tell you I CAN'T WAIT for him to get through this stage.....because choking him unfortunatley is not an option!!!
Okay I just got them in bed and have laundry to catch up.
Love you. Missing you very much.
Sara
April 20, 2006
Sara:
Thank you so much for letting us take a peek at your lives. Brandy lives on in you and the boys, and always will. I am sure he is following along right with us. I know you must be SO proud of him and yet would trade it all for Brandy to be with you again. May God continue to grant you His strength every day. I truly believe you will all be reunited someday in peace and happiness. I loved how you explained to Landon that God gets to decide when we each will go to heaven. You are an amazing woman, an inspiration to many, and a very loving, wonderful mother. I wish you every happiness always, and will be continuing to follow your lives...maybe we will see you sometime during Police Week, as we are there every year. Please let me know if there is anything I can do for you while you are here in town or anytime.
Kelly Gulich
wife and sister of Metropolitan police officers (DC)
FOP Auxiliary DC #1
Kelly Gulich
Reserve Deputy, Fairfax County VA
April 20, 2006
Still thinking of you everyday. Your buddy is finally turning things around. Keep and eye over him
April 20, 2006
HOPPY EASTER BRAN!!!!
April 17, 2006
Happy Easter
Thinking about you today
April 16, 2006
Bran,
Hey it has been a while, I still talk to you daily, I just haven't been up to writing it out recently. The boys are on spring break from school. I took them to the zoo today. Krissy came with me. I needed help because I had surgery last Friday. I'm not moving so fast. The boys were so good and had so much fun at the zoo. They loved it as usual. You always hated the zoo. You avoided it at all cost. We just took our time today and let the boys do whatever they wanted. After I didn't feel very good so the boys went home with Krissy for a bit to play with her kids when they got out of school. Todd brought them home around 9. I asked Landon if he had fun, he said yeah Noah has cool toys. Ty Ty was already asleep with twinkie smeared all over his face so I know Krissy spoiled them while they were there.
Spring is here and the boys are outside all the time. Just like daddy!! I have the itch to start planting stuff. I have been checking out all the flowers at the store, trying to decide what I want to plant in the beds.
My surgery really scared Landon. He was pretty upset. It was unexpected and Missy had to pick the boys up from school. When she told Landon that Mommy had to have surgery and was staying the night at the hospital, he told her that Mommy was never ever coming home and she would die. She brought them over to see me as soon as I was up and around. He was much better once he saw that I was walking. It of course brought up lots of hospital questions. They have been pretty good for me. Mom came over one day to help and Aunt Marilyn took them to her house one day. Ty gets upset because I can't pick him up yet. Landon sometimes forgets and jumps on my lap too hard.
I am going to try a new therapy with Landon. He is still seeing his counselor but I have heard a lot about hippatherapy. It is with horses. They use it in the MR/DD program alot for kids with disabilities. They haven't used it much with grief but I think it might help Landon. I am waiting on a call about it. At any rate he will love it because it involves horses. It is supposed to help them feel in control of something larger than them.
On the way out of the zoo today I stopped by the hawk enclosure and just looked at the hawk up close. It is such a powerful bird. I know why you chose it. I still see them along the road all the time. Just watching from above. Keep watching us, we miss you so much especially during this time of year when we were getting outside and having a good time.
T-ball practice started last week. I didn't get all emotional this year. Landon is so excited. He did really well. I had to remind him to let other kids have a turn trying to get the the ball. He tackles other little kids if they get to the ball first. During practice Landon had to potty. I took him up to the port-a-pot...he went inside then poked his head out. He said, "Hey Mom there is chocolate in here." I said, "No honey that's not chocolate just go potty." Of course that opened the flood of questions about exactly what that was.....I was cracking up laughing.
Well it is late and I am going to get to sleep. THe boys will have me up bright and early as usual.
Love you, missing you very much.
Sara
April 11, 2006
Brandy, I visited your memorial yesterday for the first time. It was a beautiful sunny day and I did it with much apprehension. I have had such anger and resentment since you died. Questions of God and my faith. You always had a way of making everyone around you laugh and there was this peace that surrounded you. It was hard to be caught up in anything bringing you down when you were around. For the first time yesterday at your memorial I finally got the feeling that this was gonna be alright. I just have such anger at what your Family has had to go through and that they have to be without You. I find it hard not to concentrate on the loss. What a great legacy of Honor, Bravery, Integrity, Freindship, Trust, and Love you have left for them. Brother, these are things that just eminated from you without any effort at all. That is what a Hero does and is. His silent actions guiding the rest of humanity into something better. If at the end of my watch someone can say this about me than I would believe that I have really accomplished something in this life and that my life and not it's end would be the focus of an eternal celebration. As the sun set yesterday I found so much peace for the first time in a long time. I know once again it was because I came to visit you and once again as always,You gave something of yourself to one of your brothers. I will celebarte You everday and I keep your family in my prayers. In Mercy Me's song "Homesick" a line says "In Christ There Are No Goodbye's." This is the substance of faith and my prayer is that God will make that more real than ever for Your family. "Poi Si Torno All enterna Fontana. So shall we all My Brother, Thank You for Your Honor and the small slice of life that I was able to share with you.
April 10, 2006
Bran,
Well its been a while since I've posted anything.I don't know if Sara has told you or not but Ryan is flying the helicopter for the sheriffs office.He recently went to St.Louis for a conference, he had a great time and wants to go back. He flys just about everyday.I know he wishes you could be here to share the experience with him.I think he likes to fly so he try to be a little bit closer to you. He misses you so much. We got to visit with Sara a while back and she couldn't get done telling Ryan how proud she was of him, that means a lot to him.I know Ryan would love to take Landon and Tyler for rides if Sara would let him. I've started my internship out at the sheriffs office and love every second of it.I've spent the most time with Lovell on first shift. I made the comment the other day I would have given anything to be able to do a ride along with you.Brian of course just laugh and said I would have had a great time with you.
They all have stories about you. When one starts a story they all stop to listen and then another one will chime in with yet another Brandy story.They laugh and say what ham you were. I think they have pulled together and are really watching out for one another now more than ever which as a wife makes me feel better. Ryan is on 1st shift for the time being until he completes his training on the big chopper then he goes to 2nd. He can't wait, says he doesn't care for being on 1st shift its to early for him to get up. He's like you, he would rather be on a shift where all the action is. I just dont think he could stay awake on 3rd! Okay well I had better get going. We miss you and love you so very much. Keep watch over my helicopter man.
Love,
Amber
Amber Zempter
April 4, 2006
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