Family, Friends & Fellow Officers Remember...

Hey Snookums,

It is shortly after midnight on Sunday 7/20. You have been gone for eight months. That is eight months to long. I miss you every minute of every hour of every day. This past week has been a learning experience for me. You taught me two lessons (yup you know it is coming). Lesson one, never let the car run out of gas. Yes you can say you told me so. I heard you over and over in my head, along with some other choice words. I had a blonde moment. I never in all the years we had the corvette realized that the last bar read "empty". I though I had one more bar to go to get me to a gas station. Luckily, Stan had just passed where I broke down and he picked me up and we went to Home Depot and then the gas station to fill up a gas can and bring it back to the car. Stan was laughing at me and telling me what he thought you were saying to him. I felt like an idiot and I knew you were just shaking your head and making fun of me. You always told me that oneday I was going to break down. You were right!

The second lesson I learned was a serious one. It had to do with a movie I saw with Kim and Shannon later Friday night after I broke down. We saw the movie Million Dollar Baby. It was about a boxer who found herself with a broken neck confined to a wheelchair and completely paralyzed. Clint Eastwood's character wanted her to stay alive for his own selfish reasons. The boxer wanted to die. Had you not have passed away from your head injuries, your quality of life would have been the same as the boxers. I know you wouldn't have wanted to live like that, but for my own selfish reasons, I would have wanted you here with me. The lesson learned was I was wrong in putting my needs before yours. You are now in a place where you are completely healed and have no pain. I only ever wanted the best for you and I have to unfortunately accept that the best for you when it comes to what happened is where you are now. If there was any cure in the world that would have made you better, you know I would have searched all over for it. You should be here with me and the rest of our families and friends Duke. Eight months later and I still don't understand why any of this happened and I know I never will.

Sleep tight my love. Please continue to stand behind me and give me the strength to more forward and continue to stand up for you and for what is right. I will always keep my promise to you. We still have several more months of battles to overcome and win. You know how I feel about all of that mess.

I love you,
Jenn

Jennifer Aaron
Wife of Ofc. Duke G. Aaron, III

March 20, 2005

Hey my Snookums,

The corned beef and cabbage were really good. I just wish the seating was better. My luck, there were only two places to sit. The same table you, me, Kim, Stan and Matt sat at last year, and a booth. We found ourselves at that table. I only asked that I sit on the opposite side this year. Kim picked up on it right away as well as to where we were sitting. My mom and the rest of the crew didn't go. Kim felt like getting a coffee after we ate. I let Stan take your truck and I drove with Kim. He said he knew you were with him because the song "Modern Day Bonnie and Clyde" came on the radio and he said that you and him had a conversation about the part "with a red head riding shotgun" because he said it always reminded you of me sitting next to you in the truck. Everytime I am in your truck, I either hear George Strait songs (thank goodness not our wedding song though because I don't know how I would react to hearing that while I was driving) or the song "Mud on the Tires" by Brad Paisley. I remember the first time you played that song for me when you bought the cd. We were driving on Mountain Road.

I had a dream of you this morning. It started off really good and then turned really bad. Why is it that we are forbidden to even communicate with each other in my dreams? I hope and pray every night to dream of you and when I do, it is far and few in between and the dreams are always brief and right before I wake up in the morning. I just don't understand.

Tomorrow is going to be a challenge for me. I am going to another police funeral. A co-workers wife passed away. She was a Sgt. for MSP and passed away from cancer. I didn't realize all that was going to take place until this afternoon. Steve told me not to worry and that I will have a lot of support if I need it. It will be the first funeral I have attended since yours and how ironic that it be another officers. I need to be there for my co-workers in their time of sorrow. They were there for me.

I also forgot to tell you that I bought the movie Ladder 49 the other day. Me, mom and Mr. Phil saw it at the movies several months ago because I heard it was a good movie. It was to soon for me to see that at the time I saw it. Not only did the funeral scenes bring back memories, but the worse part was seeing Trooper 6 and the entire medivac team in the movie. Out of all the MSP helicopters and medivac teams in the State, the one in the movie had to be the one that took you to the hospital. Today in the mail I received some media coverage from the scene of the accident on July 20th. A news station out of VA was the only news station nice enough to mail me the coverage. I asked them if I could obtain it because it shows the medivac crew putting you into Trooper 6. I saw you Duke. You were still here with me at that time. I needed to see that to help with my closure in understanding all that took place although I will never understand why I all of this took place.

As always, please keep me strong. It is a daily struggle to keep going forward. Things have not gotten any easier that's for sure. I miss you Duke and I love you more than anything in the world. Sleep tight my love.

Love ya,
Jenn

Jennifer Aaron
Wife of Ofc. Duke G. Aaron, III

March 17, 2005

Hey babe,

I talked to my dad today who triggered a fond memory of you and I. He mentioned how he went to the county dump today. I told him how I loved to go to the A.A. Co. dump with you (I remember that smell like it was yesterday). You would always take and stop off at that little grocery store by the dump in Millersville to get something to drink after we left the dump. It was fun to go there when we had stuff to throw away and drive up the big hills and when it rained to get the truck muddy. Speaking of the truck, sorry it took me so long to get the flat tire fixed. Ryan found the large bolt that I ran over and circled it. It was kind of funny (at least to us because we all knew you weren't laughing) how Ryan, Jarrod, Sharon, and I stood around your truck and just laughed thinking about what you were thinking. It kind of reminded me of the television show King of the Hill. I also know you bothered my dad as well to get him over and fix the flat. How else could he explain his power windows coming down when the keys weren't even in the ignition? Or the radio coming on? Can you believe he took his truck back to the Nissan dealer and they asked him if he consulted with a priest because they found nothing wrong with the truck? After that, he knew he had to get your truck tire changed immediately. You got us all there Duke and it was pretty funny. Sorry.

We had court yesterday for your situation. You know how that went! I have been talking to Ofc. Winder's wife Lorrie the last couple of days and she told me that she is having similar problems. I told her again how you were at Brian's funeral and how you were really touched by it. I am so glad that she and Sara are in my life because they know exactly what I am going through. Keith was with me at court yesterday. Your dad also came. My former classmate Joe who you met almost five years ago was my escort last time. Glenn is going to be my escort for DC and Keith and Beckette are his backup's. Keith's little boy is so adorable. He looks like his daddy with a hint of mommy thrown in there. Keith and I talked about you yesterday and one day last week. He misses you Duke. All the posse miss you. I just wish I could take away their sadness. I have leaned on Glenn and Keith so much. Thank you for your wonderful friends.

As usual, I haven't been able to remember much. You have been gone almost eight months (this coming Sunday). I miss you more than anyone can imagine. The song on the radio right now is Journey's Faithfully. Like the song says "I'm forever yours, faithfully". You know that holds true for you and I. Keith mentioned to me yesterday how he knew that I was your world. I told him we were each other's world. You never saw one of us without the other right? That was us.

Keith always asks about Amber and the cats. They miss you still as well. I took Amber down to your grave the other day. She didn't doodle this time on you. Thank goodness because I was a little embarassed last time. She must have been mad at you that day. This time, I tried to explain to her that her daddy didn't intentionally mean to leave us and how some bad man with disregard to public safety took you away from us. I don't know if she got it or not. I just know from watching those pet shows that you should try to explain stuff to your pets. Hopefully she understood. I know she knows when I am upset that is for sure. She sticks by my side. Last night, she slept up against my back on your side the entire night. The other night, she and I sat down with your patrol hat again. She smelled it and then acted a little strange. She wouldn't come to me after that and instead laid at the foot of the bed looking depressed. I am sure she recognizes your scent still, but because she don't see you is confused.

Well Duke, I should get off here and get home to the "kids". My mom, Mr. Phil, Kim, Stan, Matt, and whoever else may be coming are going to get corned beef and cabbage tomorrow for St. Patrick's Day like we did last year. Remember that long wait? I know, you don't like corned beef or cabbage. But you liked cole slaw. That was you, always confusing when it came to what you liked to eat. You didn't like cheese, but you liked Mac and Cheese and pizza. Remember how I would sneak stuff into your food and watch you eat it then I would ask you if you liked what you ate. When you would say yes, I would start laughing and then tell you what was in it. You tried to play it off by saying you thought something tasted different, but I got you in the end. I got you with tea one time and substituted honey in it instead of sugar. You didn't know the difference until I started laughing. That was the worst part about playing that game on you. I never could just keep it a secret. Your dislikes were all in your head silly :)

I love you more than anything else in the world Duke. Times are getting rougher. Please keep me strong.

Love you,
Jenn

P.S. Do you like the new bunch of roses I brought to you on Saturday. How about the spring mix? You were the one that always brought me flowers. I promise you this, now it is my turn to do the same for you. Roses were your thing. I told my mom the other day how you will always have a bouquet of roses on your grave.

Jennifer Aaron
Wife of Ofc. Duke G. Aaron, III

March 16, 2005

Brother Aaron, you are not forgotten. Thank you for your service. To Mrs. Aaron and all of Duke's family, friends and co-workers, God Bless you all.

Scott Sparks, Patrolman
Chesterfield County Police Dept., VA

March 14, 2005

thank you for your service. you are a true hero.

Explorer Chris Chappell
Maryland State Police

March 7, 2005

Hey Snookums,

Well it is tax time again. I hope you are proud of me. As statements started to come in the mail, I gathered everything up into a basket. I tried so hard to remember everything you used to gather up including taking the year before returns. I hope I did you proud. I went back to our old CPA from two years ago. He was angry and upset about what happened to you. We got to talking about when you thought we were getting back 1,200 dollars, but when we got what you thought was a check in the mail, it actually was a letter that said we owed 1,200 dollars. The look on your face was classic! Although everyone else laughed, including me (because seriously babe your reaction was like I said classic), you were so upset because you were afraid we weren't going to have any money to go on our anniversary trip or any money reserved if the heat pump unit went up. We fortunately were able to enjoy our last anniversary trip ever together in Williamsburg in 2003 with what we did get back. Luckily the heat pump never went up and it is still going strong. Remember how my dad said not to worry about it that he would put a new compressor on it if it ever went up?

Two days ago was a little rough for me. I missed hearing your voice and took out some video tapes. I watched your academy graduation video. I had to laugh because it showed you in a training exercise with your hat backwards and you were sneaking around a corner with your little red plastic gun saying "were backing up". Lt. Perry then called off the scenerio (he and I had some other fun conversations about your academy experiences in past conversations). Then I watched you and Dave get the Class 29 Liason awards for being cadets that turned into cops. Then it was time for your swearing in. I was so proud of you then and I am still so proud of you now. I will never forget that morning before the graduation that you came to my work. I often look at that picture of you I took outside the mall standing next to your red truck. I am so glad Mona gave me off that afternoon so that I could be there to share in your special day. I will never forget your first day at the academy in October 1997 and how you wanted to give up the first day and my mom and I told you that you couldn't nor would anyone let you. I will never forget sitting at the library with you doing your research while you and a couple other guys goofed around and waited for me to find the answers because you said that since I was studying law in college at the time that I would be able to find the answers quicker. I will never forget helping you study for tests. I will never forget rubbing your hands, shoulders and back down with ben-gay almost every night before I tucked you into bed before I went home because you had to do so many push-ups or because you were getting your butt kicked in defensive tactics and your body ached. And I will never forget when you cut all your hair off for the first time (right before I took you to New York with me on a field trip with my college). I was showing Sharon that picture not to long ago and I swear you and your cousin Rob look so much alike in it. You also remind me of your grandfather in that picture.

Then it was on to our cruise video. The last portion was when we got back to our room and Brittney, Jacqueline, and Justin spent the night with us. I was taping you and them listening to the prank voice messages they left on our machine. We were all laughing and they were getting on you for erasing them before they finished listening to them. I just had to hear your voice Duke. I had to see you and us laugh. We laughed a lot.

When I dropped my mom off last night, because she went with me to the CPA, I was telling her how I now know what my grandma meant when she said she missed my grandpop and how she just wanted to be with him even though she was surrounded by everyone who loved and cared about her. I never understood any of what she was saying until now. I admire my grandma for continuing to live and I look up to her for her strength. Now that she is gone, please look out for her up there in heaven for me, as well as my two pops and my grandmom Francis. Hey you thought I giggled a lot when I drank, try giving grandma France some alcohol. You will see where I get it from :)

I miss you more than anything. I just wish you could come home. I would give anything to be able to hold and kiss you again. Sleep tight my love.

Love,
Jenn

Jennifer Aaron
Wife of Ofc. Duke G. Aaron, III

March 3, 2005

Duke,
I can honestly say that you are truly missed at MdTA, all the officers look back everyday and say that you were one of the best. Beleive me when my husband comes home from working on the road for 8 hours a day, I am thankful that you and "E" bring him home to me.When I met Jenn for the first time she told me that this was a life time contract that I had signed when we got married. I honestly do beleive what Jenn told me and I thankful her for opening my eyes to see what could happen out there. Just remember you and "E" are up there to protect the rest of the other officers that are still down here protecting and serving for evryone else..... Rest in peace!!!!!
With our love!

March 2, 2005

Hey my Snookums,

You would have laughed at me today. Me, my mom, and Mrs. Marylee went to the diner. I ordered a steak salad. When they brought it to me, I noticed that my meat had hair growing all over it. Come to find out, it was anchovies mixed in with the steak. Did you know they had hair all over them? Well needless to say, I lost my appetite. Somehow, we got on the discussion of mayo. I told them how I can't even smell it without feeling sick. Mrs. Marylee asked me about your lunches. I told her how you liked ketchup on your lunchmeat. You and my mom always made fun of me for finding bugs and other foreign objects in my food.

On the way back from dropping Mrs. Marylee off, I was telling my mom about that one time you made me dinner by candlelight when you still lived at home with your parents. You had taped all these love songs onto a tape and you bought chinese food for dinner. When I asked you where you got the chinese food from, you paused and said that if you told me that I wouldn't want to eat it. Then you said "it was the only place open at 10:00 this morning". Right then I knew where you got it from. It was that place I ate at one time at lunch when I found a roach in my food. Remember the entire evening I was holding my food up to the candle to check for bugs and you kept telling me to stop worrying and just eat my food.

After I left my moms, I stopped at Giant to get something for my cold. I passed the frozen food isle and I saw that they had ice cream sandwiches on sale. They were your favorite. Remember how I would always bring you home a surprise from the grocery store when I would go food shopping? I would either bring you candy bars, steamed shrimp, or ice cream sandwiches and I would make you close your eyes and hold out your hands to give you what I bought you. I never thought that thinking about ice cream sandwiches would make me cry, but I guess I was wrong.

I got to see Brittney the other day. What a beautiful young lady our niece has become. She is taller than me now. I just wish you could be here to see all three of them grow up. I wish you were here to be able to meet your new niece (yes, Mary is supposedly having another girl). I gave Brittney and Hannah the two winter hats you had up in the closet. I also gave each of them a copy of Crossings. I saved a copy for little Debi as well and although I didn't have a hat to give her, I will be giving each of the girls a shadow box with some of your work stuff in them later on. I still can't touch any of your stuff. I look at your clothes every day and it comforts me to know that you hung them up and put them away.

This past Friday, I visited on-line the National Law Enforcement Officers Memorial web-site. There was this article that caught my attention regarding more cops being killed in automobile accidents. Guess who was the first officer that was talk about (even though I know how much you hated to have to guess)? Although bitter-sweet, you were the first officer talked about and honored for your dedication to your job. I say bitter-sweet because I would rather have you here safe in my arms than having had you taken from me. Duke you know how proud I am of you. I know you always said that your job was "just a job", but you too should be proud of everything that you had accomplished within the ten years that you were with your department. I am so glad that I was able to share in all of your accomplishments from pretty much the very beginning.

I love you more than anything in the whole wide world Duke. Sleep tight my love.

Love,
Jenn

Jennifer Aaron
Wife of Ofc. Duke G. Aaron, III

February 27, 2005

Jennifer,
I was checking out the ODMP today and came across your husband's site. I just want you to know that I will keep you in my thoughts. This is certainly a long, hard road that we are being lead down.
I noticed that the one year mark will be coming up soon. I've been told that the second year is the toughest. I didn't believe it until about a month ago. It has really hit me hard (again)after a year and a half. I know that you have been through enough, but just try to prepare yourself for the upcoming year. Lock his love and the good memories away in your heart and never let them go.
God bless our husbands.

Jennifer Waters

Jennifer Waters
Wife of Mike Waters EOW 9-11-03

February 23, 2005

Hey Snookums,

Today makes seven months since you have been gone. Where did the time go? I talked to Mary and Kevin tonight. Mary was talking about the pictures she took of you, Kevin, and Jarrod the last and final time you went to West Virginia. She is going to send me a picture and she is also going to email the one you wanted her to send you of your four-wheeler covered in mud. I am so glad that was their house you tried to track mud into and not ours :) I can't imagine what these pictures are going to look like, but the way she described them, it seems as if you and the rest of the guys took a bath in the mud. Every time I think of West Virginia, I always think back to my last visit there with you. What I thought was four glasses of wine turned out to be two bottles. How did I ever lose track? Oh I remember now, it was because Mary and I were so into the movies we were watching while you and Kevin were four-wheeling in the dark. The kettle corn was a big mistake. To this day, I can still smell and taste it and it grosses me out. It was funny how you thought that after all of that I would call out sick from work so you would have one more day to four-wheel. You and Kevin tried everything you could to get me to stay, but I was such an honest employee and thought that it would have been wrong to call out of work like you both tried to get me to do. Instead, we left for home really late, got lost, and drove in the rain for over five hours. I will never forget that trip. You were not in a good mood that's for sure. I really did enjoy going down to the river and also watching the train go by while I sat on the back of your four-wheeler with my arms wrapped around you the entire time. You would always laugh at me after we got back because that was the last time I ever drank anything for a really long time. It is funny because the other week, I went to the grocery store with Jaime and little Kevin and Jaime ran up to the kettle corn and was telling me how much she loved it (not knowing about my experience in WVA). I am so glad I didn't have anything in my stomach at the time because I truly believe I would have lost it. Instead, I smiled and two personal moments that you and I shared from the WVA trip came racing through my mind.

Yesterday I watched little Debi while the crew went to play bingo. She is getting so big. I kept telling myself how you should be here to see her grow. One of the last pictures of you and her is hanging on the wall in the back room of my grandmoms house. It is the one in your black uniform and it is one of my favorites of you both together.

Today was Frank and Eileen's little girl Breanna's christening. It was held at the church you and I got married at. I remembered back to our wedding day and could picture us standing at the alter while I was sitting there. That was such a beautiful day. I wore my necklace with our wedding picture on it today. Kim asked little Matt who was on the picture and he started to smile when Kim asked him if that was Uncle Duke with Aunt Jenn in the picture. He is the closest we will ever get to having our own nephew. Kim and Stan have a picture of you and Matt up on their entertainment center. I have one of the both of you up on ours to.

Duke, please keep me strong. Knowing you, you are probably throwing your hands up and saying "what do you want me to do" like you would always do when I knew I couldn't handle something myself. Well this is one of those times and I need you to keep standing behind me and giving me strength. "Miss Independent" needs you now more than ever.

Well the kids are ready for bed. The five of us love you and miss you. You have been gone seven months to long, but I know that every day that goes by is one more day closer to being with you again. Sleep tight my love.

Love,
Jenn

Jennifer Aaron
Wife of Ofc. Duke G. Aaron, III

February 20, 2005

Hey baby,

It is really late and I just got home from seeing a movie with Kim and Stan. When Kim went to drop Matt off at her moms, Stan said how he misses his buddy. He misses you so much Duke and I feel so guilty that he has been robbed of your company every time I get to see Kim. We all came to the conclusion that the last movie we all seen together was Bad Boys 2. I was talking about that movie the other day and it seems that you are not the only person who liked the part when the little girl goes on the date and the crazy uncle comes to the door. Remember how you always said you were going to pull that trick on our nieces dates? Even I was so looking forward to that.

Two days ago, I received in the mail the first issue of the magazine Crossings from your department. Inside was a beautiful article put together about you. I know you remember Todd that worked with you when you were a cadet. It was his wife Kelly that I went to ballet school with that wrote the article. I remember the first time you came to see my dance recital. You were so happy to see Todd there because you felt out of place and having him there made you feel a little better. When I first started to read the article, I had to put it down. I was over Sharon and Rick's and little Ricky asked me if I was okay because I started to cry. The article starts out with your radio transmission "L4 Bay Bridge Copy Traffic..." and then "10-8...". When I got home that evening and knew what I was in for, I finally finished the three pages with photos about you. Another thing that got to me was "Officer Aaron gained quite a reputation at the Bridge for his prankster tricks. His circle of friends grew, as did his love for the young, 17 year-old-girl he had met on a blind date soon after joining the force in 1994. He bought her roses every week during their courtship...". The last thing that got to me was "Officer Aaron would not return to the Bay Bridge, nor to the arms of his wife, Jennifer, or to their family and friends". One of the pictures shows the roadside memorial and your tire tracks leading out into the middle of the highway. As always, I will never understand.

I conquered my fear of going up to the hospital yesterday. I had to for my family. I thought I was doing okay until I drove past where the media was standing that day and the doors I was rushed into to get to you. When I left to go home after you had passed away, there stood several motorcycle cops who had been there for hours waiting to find out if you were going to be okay. I went up to each of them and thanked them for being there for you before I was escorted home by all of them. Ironically, I drove the same route home yesterday as well and didn't realize I did it until I was almost home. At least Uncle Gary was in a different portion of the hospital so I didn't actually have to sit in the same wing as I did on July 20th. That may have made it more difficult than it already was. Speaking of Uncle Gary, thank you so much for looking out for him. He had four by-passes and his surgery was a success. I knew you were there with him as I was there for Aunt Margie and Colleen.

I love you more than anything in the world. I miss you more than anyone can imagine. Sleep tight my love.

Love,
Jenn

Jennifer Aaron
Wife of Ofc. Duke G. Aaron, III

February 19, 2005

Jenn - Hi, I'm Sara Winfield's sister, I want to let you know I am praying for your family. I hope your Uncle pulls through. Walking into that hospital will flood your mind with so many bad memories, I hope you don't have to do it. If you do be strong, call Sara, she has had to go back to the hospital with Tyler since that dreaded day in October, she will get you in those doors. I was on the phone with her the night of your birthday when you called. When she called me back and told me what a cruddy birthday you had, I felt so bad. I have a bad birthday story too, I'll share with you but even though it is bad it's kinda funny. I just turned 30 this past September and my husband surprised me with a party. When I got there my step dad had been playing football with my six year old and broke his wrist, then my mother-in-law (who had a few too many) thought she could be like a six year old and decided to do a cart wheel. She tried twice and both times, smashed her face into the garage floor came crashing down into folding chairs and ended up seperating her shoulder. As bad as all this seemed at the time, we all did have fun and now looking back it was a great fun night that we all got to spend with Brandy. We got a good picture of him and my husband together and had a blast with his cowboy hat. So hopefully even though bad things happened on your birthday, you will be able to laugh about it soon and hey it made you dream about Duke, that isn't so bad right? I think about you a lot and your family is in our prayers. Hope to meet you in DC - Much Love,

Missy Pierce
Brandy Winfield's Sister-in-law EOW 10/14/04

Missy Pierce
Brandy Winfield's sister-in-law EOW 10/14/04

February 18, 2005

Hey my Snookums,

Yesterday when I wrote to you, I mentioned how I didn't know how the rest of my day was going to turn out. Well... Uncle Gary is worse than what the doctors thought (according to my dad) so they are going to transfer him to Univ. of MD tomorrow and do the bypass surgery (I think). I told Kim S. tonight how I want to be there to support Aunt Margie and Colleen, but I just don't think I can step foot in that hospital right now. It is bad enough I sometimes drive that route and think back to the day I was rushed there to be with you. I don't know how I would actually do walking into those hospital doors. I guess I may have to find out though. Yesterday while we were all sitting in the waiting room at North Arundel, it broke my heart to see everyone cry. My dad even cried when we left from visiting him. I kept telling Colleen that her dad was going to be okay. I stayed strong, but after I saw him and we left the hospital, I had my moment where I let it all out. Please Duke, look over Uncle Gary and make sure he comes through this situation okay. I don't want to have Aunt Margie and Colleen have to go through what I am going through with losing you. I am also not ready to lose another relative.

I miss you so much. I miss us. I love you more than anything in the world.

Sleet tight my love.

Love,
Jenn

Jennifer Aaron
Wife of Ofc. Duke G. Aaron, III

February 15, 2005

Hi Jenn,

I read on your relections that you just had a birthday so I wanted to wish you a Happy Birthday. I'm sorry it didn't turn out well for you. I'm also sorry about the little cat. The more I read your reflections, the more I realize we share a love for animals!

The reason I wanted to write to you today is that about 2 weeks ago I was at the gym and I saw something about Duke's case on one of the news channels. I stopped to listen to it and the more I listened and the more I saw the more angry I got. After seeing that I realized how proud I am of your husband, my husband, and all the other husbands and wives that take risks everyday to put people like that off the streets.

I know there will be justice for you and for your husband. I'll say a prayer for you, your family and your litle animals at home. Take care and Happy Belated Birthday!

Kim Haynes
Wife of MdTA Officer Bryan Haynes

February 14, 2005

Snookums,

Today is Valentine’s Day. This morning before I left for work, I pulled out your frame I bought you last year (the one that said “Today you are….My Prince/A Toad”). Of course I put it on the Prince side today, but that wasn’t the case last Valentine’s Day in the beginning was it (I know you are laughing right now). I still can’t believe you didn’t take my flowers out of the grocery store bag before I got home from work (no excuses because you were home for an hour and a half before I ever got home) and I know you intentionally bought the box of chocolates so you would get them in the end because you loved boxed chocolates. I remember telling you how insensitive you were (and you kept insisting you just didn’t have time to take them out of the grocery store bag) not only because the flowers were still in the bag, but how you knew I obsessed over my weight and you bought this really big box of chocolates because you said you didn’t know what else to get me. You told me if I didn’t want them that you would take them back to the store. Remember I ran upstairs and grabbed the frame and put the picture on the toad? You went behind me and put it on the prince. We did this several more times and I couldn’t help but start laughing because you were acting simple and you knew I would eventually start laughing because you started to laugh to. Then we went back downstairs and I put my flowers in a vase and you got the chocolates (which I knew you were hoping for anyway because I didn’t buy you any because you still had some left from Christmas). The rest of the evening went the way Cupid intended Valentine’s Day to go didn’t it????? I am numb this Valentine’s Day. The song on the radio right now is “Love Stinks”. I bought little Debi a pack of heart shaped bubbles, but she is apparently not feeling good so I guess I will have to give them to her some other time. I also sent Matt, Kevin and baby John (all the little guys in my life) a card this year. Stupid me put 2004 on them instead of 2005. My head was not together on that one. All their parents got a good laugh though.

Yesterday, I went with my mom, Mr. Phil, Mrs. Marylee, Mr. Leo and Lee to the Outback Steak House. That had been the first time I had been back to that particular one since my birthday last year. We didn’t sit at the same tables we all sat at last year, but I did pass those tables and I remember where we both sat at. Also remember how we were all laughing because I gave mom Smokey the cat's ashes back from having her cremated several days prior and the box sat under the table the entire time we ate. I guess I could have waited to the end to give Smokey back to her, but I was afraid I would forget. Only my family would do something so strange like that. I am a guilty participate to. Speaking of my birthday, I am so glad the little black cat made it to heaven and he is with you. My dream that night confirmed it. That was the first I have dreamed of you since Christmas (and it was long overdue). In my dream, the little black cat had a spotlight strapped to him and he was leading us through a dark tunnel. I woke up before we ever got to the end of the tunnel (which I hope isn’t a bad thing because I don’t know how much worse my life can get at this point or how much more I can take). I wonder where he was taking us? Maybe one day I will dream of you both together again and you will tell me what you named him. Honestly, he didn’t look like a Fluffy (just in case you still haven’t named him yet). Remember how we would laugh when we would look through your picture albums and you would tell me the names of your cats that you were only allowed to keep outside growing up? Most of them were either Fluffy or Tiger and then they were numbered. That was funny. I was telling my mom yesterday that you thought of Rocky’s name while you were lying in bed one night a couple of days after we got him and Daisy. You said you thought of the Rocky Mountain’s and that is how you came up with his name. It does fit him well. Now as for when you named Blackie (our only black cat), um, you really got creative with that one babe (I am being sarcastic)!

I hope you like what I have put on your grave. I have a larger matching flag at home. We both liked the conversation hearts and that flag said it all (a heart with the word "love" and a heart with the word "you"). Then there is the thing I made with the roses. The only time I remember giving you flowers when you were here was that one Valentine's Day I had a bud vase with a stuffed frog attached to it sent to your house. From your reaction, I think you felt a little weird so I never did that again. You were the one who always liked to give the flowers.

I don't know how the rest of the day is going to turn out. The only thing I ask is that you continue to keep me strong. I LOVE YOU MORE THAN ANYTHING IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

Love ya,
Jenn

Jennifer Aaron
Wife of Ofc. Duke G. Aaron, III

February 14, 2005

i just wanted to say happy valentines day duke. say hello to my husband brian for me. i miss talking to your wife jennifer. i will call her tonight to check on her. peace be with you. love lorrie winder

lorrie winder

February 14, 2005

Jenn, I didnt know it was your bday! I am so sorry that you had such a terrible day! I am sure Duke was singing happy birthday to you from heaven. These days are the worst. It WILL get better for us after we make it through all the "firsts" (anniversaries, birthdays, holidays). I know your birthday will never be the same without your husband, however I am glad you somehow made it through.

Denise Zimmerman
Surviving Spouse of NJ State Trooper Bert Zimmerman 02-05-04

February 12, 2005

Jennifer,
I am somehow drawn to your husbands page and check it once in awhile. I am so sorry that you had such a horrible birthday. I am so sorry that you have to go thru this horrible time in your life. I do, however, promise that one day it will start to be better for you. I have been in your shoes and know from expierence that time will help ease the pain, though I know you can't see it like that now. Keep your chin up and know so many love you, especially your husband!

February 12, 2005

Hey babe,

This has been the worst birthday in my 28 years of living. Today has been so horrible that it has beaten going through our anniversay and Christmas without you. I did nothing but cry and miss you all day. I read the card you gave me last year. I miss those cards that read "to my wife on her birthday".

On top of that, did you like the companion I sent your way? Mom and I were driving to pick up Mark, Mary and Debi when we saw that little black cat get hit by a truck. Although we were meeting my dad and the rest of the crew at Pizza Hut (and we were already late), I made my mom turn around and go back to where he ran. When I located him, my mom went and got Mark and them and also got their cat cage. As I got closer to him, he got up and drug himself through the locked compound at the body shop we found him at. I banged on the door and this guy called the owner for me. Another couple came back because they saw him get hit to. My mom and them pulled up the same time and the owner of the compound let us in. Mark caught him and we shoved him in the cage. Now I am crying over this cat on top of crying over you. We took it up to Eastern Animal Hospital. The doctor said his back legs were completely crushed so I was left with no other choice but to have him put to sleep. If there was any way to have saved him, I would have paid whatever it took to make him well, but even the doctor said he was to far gone. Hopefully he is with you now and please give him a good name. You have to come up with something besides Blackie since we already have a Blackie. And don't take to long to name him like you did with Rocky. I know you will take good care of him. Everyone told me I did save him. They said I saved him from suffering and being out in the cold defenseless. I unfortunately can't look at it that way. I just wished I could have made him all better.

So now I am at home and just wanting to go to bed to get this day over with. I called Sara on the way home because I just needed to talk to someone who truly knows what I am going through. She put some things in better perspectives for me and even got me to laugh as some stuff. Like I have told you before, I don't understand how any of this could have happened and I know I never will.

Sleep tight my love.

Love ya,
Jenn

Jennifer Aaron
Wife of Ofc. Duke G. Aaron, III

February 11, 2005

Jenn,
It is so hard to leave a reflection when I can barely see the screen through my tears. Although I never was granted the opportunity to meet your husband, I found myself wandering through the ODMP pages and I stumbled onto Duke's site. I have read your reflections, a little bit at a time, and I must say, I feel like we have so much in common. Not only because we are now "police widows", but because my husband and I were only married for 7 months and never had a chance to have children.
Please know that your reflections have touched my soul, and that sometimes I am just glad that I can even muster enough strength to breathe in my next breath.
I hope to possibly meet you this year at National Police Week.
Sincerely,

Juli Verkler
Widow of Ptlm. Bryan S. Verkler EOW 12/13/03

February 9, 2005

Hey babe,

Well PJ came and got the camper today. Glenn and I met him so Glenn could go over how to set it up and take it down. Remember when Glenn did that to us? Glenn said if I didn't want to be there when PJ took it that he would get our personal stuff out of it for me. I told him that if I wasn't there to get our stuff that I would regret it. I needed that closure to add to my life. Gosh we had so many good times camping. I took our heater that we searched high and low for after we froze our butts off in early spring two years ago. Then I got your flip-flops. You can see your toe impressions on them. That was not easy to take our stuff out of the camper and know it was probably going to be the last time I saw it. I was telling PJ's wife about that one camp ground we went to with only two bathrooms and one outhouse for over a hundred people or so (okay I am overdoing it on the people count a little). It was so cold at night and then we had rain. That was a miserable trip. I hated waking up to the sounds of race cars from a race car track somewhere close by. You loved it though because it was like being in the middle of nowhere. I look at them pictures often. Glenn and I are so glad that PJ took possession of the camper. We both know that he will take good care of it and he in return knows how much it meant to both Glenn and Amy and you and I. I cried seeing it drive away. Glenn stayed strong but I could tell he was depressed as well.

Also, Glenn and I got to talking about what to put on your bench at the cemetery. I am going to see if we can get a Dunkin Donuts cup engraved on it and in quotes have "medium just sugar". Glenn started talking and laughing about the McDonalds across the Bridge and how you always got picked on by people telling you that you weren't "the real police, police" (as you put it) every time they looked at your patch because it didn't say deputy or trooper. That was you and Kevins constant joke as well. I told Glenn to get with all the guys and come up with something from them that I can have engraved. That may be a mistake though because they can come up with some crazy stuff. I want your bench to be full of quotes from you or have stuff on there that when people read it, it will make them laugh and smile because it was something you said or liked. Wait til you see what I put on the marker from me. I gave you back a preserved rose and in quotes I put "I bought you this rose because it will never die just like my love for you". I thought it was only fair to say to you the words you said to me on my card that accompanied my rose. It makes me cry every time I read that card. The weird part is that the rose looks just like the one I have only yours is bronze.

Oh and one more thing before I forget. A couple of weeks back, Annapolis FM just hired a new investigator. When I look at his name tag, I had to read it several times. I kept reading A.A.R.O.N and thinking to myself that it couldn't be right and that I must be reading A.R.R.O.N. Well it was AARON. I was so at a loss for words. I never in my life thougt I would meet another cop with our last name. We got to talking and I said that we shared the same last name but mine was by marriage. He asked me what my husband's name was and when I told him he said he was so sorry for asking me that. I said it was okay and that I was still shocked to see my last name on another cops name plate. He is from the Shore like your father's family is, but he is no relation to you that he can find at this time. I have seen him twice since and he must think I am crazy because all I do is stare at his name tag. It is the most strangest feeling. That name tag should still be on your chest every day that you went to work.

As for this past week, I know you are up there shaking your head and loving every bit of it with a grin on your face. I will always keep my promise to you and to us. I kow you are standing behind me and giving me that strength to not give up. Hopefully this week is quiet because my birthday is Friday. Remember how I always loved snow for my birthday because I said it was my birthday gift from all of my grandparents in heaven. Now don't you be smart and think about a blizzard for me. Mum Mum Kathryn should keep you in line for me. Mark and I really don't want to do anything this year. We don't even want to do the ski idea. My mom is a little disappointed with us both.

Well since I didn't sleep good last night I guess I should get around for bed. There is not a minute that goes by that I don't think about you. You are forever my Snookum and don't forget that. Sleep tight my love.

Love,
Jenn

Jennifer Aaron
Wife of Ofc. Duke G. Aaron, III

February 5, 2005

Duke,

We had Jen over my sister's last night for the Girls to meet up again. We had Jenn's Birthday dinner. It was nice we made all of her favorites. We took Pictures. It wans't the same without seeing you. When us girls get together. Stan stayed in at home. It was great for us four to see one another again. Matthew says your name everyday now. He watchs his slide show all the time. When it comes to your Pictures he smiles and says Duke. I wish you were able to see his finished cd slide show. It looks great. Thanks for always putting a smile or our son's face. It is great to see him smile. Please keep Jenn Strong now. She is needing you always, but now more then ever.

Kim

February 4, 2005

Hey Duke,

It is late and I just got done going through the stuff that Glenn gave to me from your file cabinet at work. I saw the leave slip you put in to take off for Colleen's wedding. The remarks column stated "11/13 for a family wedding". It broke my heart. Yes it was a beautiful wedding that you were approved leave to be at and you were there, but not in the way everyone would have wanted you to be. I also read some of your evaluations. Very impressive evaluations, but I didn't expect any less from you anyway. I am still curious about the evaluation my dad wrote about you when he was your FTO. Why does no one seem to be able to find that one??? As a matter of fact, I was telling someone the other day about how he wrote you up for your uniform and from that moment on, you polished your brass and shoes faithfully. I still can't believe the department put you two together and the people who did it even joked about it. I was on pins and needles the whole time praying you didn't mess up for him to have to write you up. The coffee you gave him at roll call made everyone laugh. You made it through. I will never forget hooking up with you two and watching the fireworks at the Harbor on the 4th of July in 1998. Remember how we had to resist temptation to hold hands because you were in uniform and dad was watching? No sooner we said goodbye to each other (a really quick kiss and hug), I watched you pull this car over that ran a red light. You were always so eager to do your job.

Well we went to court for your situation this past week. We are in for a long haul. I literally have no voice right now from all the "talking" I have done over the course of the week. I can't promise you all that has taken place will make a difference, but I can promise you that I will take charge and always stand up for what is right. This situation is a little tougher to handle than the one I got you out of when you bought that two-wheel drive pick-up truck you owned for several hours. I am sorry, you can argue the color of that truck all you want, but it was pink not red. You were so glad I did make you take that truck back though because less than a week later you owned your very first four-wheel drive pick-up and paid less for it than that pink one :)

I guess you are proud of me that I washed, dried, and hung my clothes up all today. On top of that, I even vaccumed. It always amazed me how you did all of that in one day where it took me two days to just wash the clothes and vaccume. Hanging them up was your job. I took on cleaning the bathroom and taking out the trash in exchange. You always made fun of me for not liking to hang up clothes and would even tell people how lazy I was and that I could just live out of the laundry basket if it were up to me. I would come back by saying that it took just as much effort to put your dishes in the dishwasher than it did to put them in the sink. Sadly, I would give anything now to have your cereal bowls and spoons piled up in the sink.

It was extremely peaceful at the cemetery with you today. The snow was falling so quietly and I was the only one there. I am sorry I couldn't stay long, but the snow plow kind of interrupted my visit. The four-wheel drive came in handy in there. Your grave has so much snow on it. I know you are in-charge of making the snow because the ground around you yesterday was starting to show grass and yours was still completely covered and deep from last weeks snowfall. You just had to give us a couple more inches today to make the green go away didn't you? It's all good!

Well it is time to go to bed. The kids are all ready to curl up and go to sleep as well. I just saw Blackie peaking in the door. Sleep tight my love and remember the five of us love you more than anything in the world.

Love,
Jenn

Jennifer Aaron
Wife of Ofc. Duke G. Aaron, III

January 30, 2005

Hey Snoogie Boogie,

Well I have written to you twice in one day. That is unusual, but I just had to tell you about who I spent my evening with. I called my mom to ask her why little Debi was over her house earlier this afternoon because I thought something may have been wrong. My mom said she still had little Debi and that she just wanted to go bye bye with grandma earlier. My mom said she was going around the house the whole day saying Ju-Ju, Ju-Ju so I got in the truck and went to my moms. I was so surprised at how little Debi was towards me. I think for once she actually missed me because she wasn't clinging to my mom the entire time. We sat on the floor and played and then my mom and I took her home. I mentioned to Mary that six months ago last night, she was the last person I talked to. Ironically, Mary was again the last person I talked to last night. We laughed because when she called me that evening, she wanted to know where you were and if you had called up this radio station and dedicated a love song to a girl named Stephanie because the guy said his name was Duke. I laughed and said you were in bed. She actually wanted me to go and wake you up. The only song you were listening to that night was the pattern of your snoring. You were so exhausted from working 3A to 3P that day. I can't dwell on the had of's, should of's, could of's, but had I have known that was the last evening I would ever have gotten to spend with you, I would have woke you up and kept you up all night so you would have been even more exhausted and then you would have had to call out of work. Then the accident wouldn't have happened and we would be living our simple happy lives.

A part of me thinks you had something to do with me going over to visit little Debi tonight. Had I not have gone over there, I was on the path of a serious cry that was working on me before I ever left work. That little girl saved me from all of that and she made my day. I got so many kisses from her tonight. More than I have ever gotten in the past from her. Things sure do work out in mysterious ways don't they?

Sleep tight my love and continue to watch over me, Amber, Rocky, Daisy, and Blackie while we sleep. I miss you more than anything and would give anything to have you home.

I love you,
Jenn

Jennifer Aaron
Wife of Ofc. Duke G. Aaron, III

January 20, 2005

When I woke up this morning and was tying my boots, I remembered that exactly six months ago today you were tying your boots for the last time. Duke I can still see you stare at me from the bedroom door before you turned and walked away to go to work. I still can’t believe that this horrible, horrible reality nightmare has happened. When I think about the injuries you sustained, you didn’t even have the option to live or die. You fought hard, but your head injury was 100% fatal. I researched all your injuries and even had my grandfather’s doctor confirm my research. I just needed to understand all that I could for closure. I still have a long way to go for other closure though. I can’t believe it has been six months. It seems like all of this just happened yesterday. I will never understand any of this.

I still can’t tell you much about what I have been doing with my time the last six months. It is probably for the better that I don’t remember although it is pretty embarrassing when someone asks “what did you do this weekend” and all I can do is look at them like I am dumb. I love my family and friends and I spend a lot of my time with them, but I can’t really appreciate all that is going on because all I think about is all that has happened. I don’t want to bring people who have happy lives down and I try not to bring the situation up, but I do and it also shows on my face. I was with Glenn and Amy the other day. Kayla is getting so big and she is so smart. Glenn gave me back my television you guys used at work and he also gave me a bag full of some more of your personal stuff I told him I wanted to go through. I was standing in his driveway in the bitter cold crying my eyes out about everything. I felt so bad that I kept him outside so long away from his family. Getting the bag of your personal stuff was what made me cry because I knew I would be looking at your handwriting when I had to go through it.

Yesterday we had our first snowfall of the year (as you already know). I kept remembering what Glenn and my co-workers told me about four-wheel drive as I left to go home from work. Well I am such an idiot. I thought I was in four-wheel drive, but I was wondering why there was no symbol on your dashboard that indicated I was in four-wheel drive. When I got home and asked Mike, he started laughing at me because I was in two-wheel drive the whole time. I knew I would mess it up somehow and told him I can’t do this any more by myself and that you had to come home to drive me around in the snow. Mike also mentioned how you would want for me to get the four-wheeler out and go for a ride with him and Brian down to the trail. He doesn’t know me very well does he? I am not as easily persuaded as you to go with them and hope I don’t get caught by the cops. Besides, I still don’t know how to even turn it on. I told my co-workers I was not going to stand out in the cold long enough for them to show me how to use it and that it will now have to wait until the weather warms up. I am sure you are impressed with me though for signing up to take the ATV Riders Safety Course when it comes around our way. Jarrod and Jeff were outside shoveling their sidewalks as well. I told them that as usual, you got out of shoveling snow this year. I had to find some humor somehow. It made us all laugh. We are supposed to get hit hard this weekend with more snow. Snookums, I swear if you have anything to do with the weather and we get a blizzard, you are going to be in big trouble. I don’t want to have to go through what we went through in 2003. We ran out of room in the front yard with so many snow piles and the corvette was buried till spring. I have to laugh remembering when you brought me home from the dentist and I was still sedated because I was scared to go to the dentist. All I remember is opening your truck door. You told me the next morning that I fell out of the truck and into the snow pile. You then had to pick me out of the pile and drag me inside. When I asked you about what I wore to bed, you told me I dressed my own self. Sure I did! At least you got a good laugh out of me.

Next week is coming up fast. Duke I am so scared, nervous and anxious all at the same time. My stomach is in knots. Please keep me strong and give me the courage to face this guy without showing my fear. I can’t tell you enough how much we will fight hard for you and how much support you have on your side.

I love you with all my heart and I miss you every minute of every hour of every day.

Love,
Jenn

Jennifer Aaron
Wife of Ofc. Duke G. Aaron, III

January 20, 2005