Family, Friends & Fellow Officers Remember...

Hi Jenn.
I just wanted to let you know that I still think of you and hope you are doing okay. I read your reflections often and just cry like a baby! You have really touched my heart. I hope I get the chance to meet you next year in Washington.
I'm glad that you and Juli V. are talking. She is so sweet. I had a great time with her in D.C. this year.
I hope that Duke and Mike are friends up there. They're probably playing silly twinkie tricks on everyone. Oh, wait a minute. Mike probably ate all the twinkies by now! Ha!
Keep your chin up.
Love, Jenn Waters

Jennifer Waters
Wife of Mike Waters, West Memphis PD, Arkansas EOW 9-11-03

August 21, 2005

Jennifer,Wow what a remarkable woman you are!I did not know until a few months ago that this site even existed until one of our own Deputy George Griffin of the White County Sheriffs Dept was killed in a tragic accident right in front of me,my husband and 14 year old son.My husband was his Lt. I being a Paramedic immediately ran to his aid and knew he was in critical condition,he spoke his last words and took his last breath in my hands. My husband Lt.Norman Hale was in law enforcement when we married 15yrs ago,I never knew so many officers were killed in the line of duty each year,one of those being Duke,as I have read the reflections what an officer he was!! Something you can be so proud of! Im so sorry for your great lose and I pray for you,Denise and Jennifer Waters nightly,I know there are many others but you 3 have touched my heart,even though I dont know you,I think of you often.God Bless you today and always!
Tonia Hale Paramedic and Wife of White County Lt.Norman Hale

Tonia Hale Paramedic

August 21, 2005

Hey Duke,

My dad and I just got done going to a sobriety check-point kick-off for the State of Maryland at Shock Trauma. It was supposed to be outside, but they moved it into an auditorium cause of the rain. I got up to go to the restroom and as I exited the auditorium, I looked left and I got a feeling in my stomach like someone had punched me. I realized at that time where I actually was. It was the wing of the hospital that everyone was taken to on the day of your crash and the auditorium that my dad and I was in for the event today was the lecture room that I was taken to after you had passed away to talk to the State crisis team. I then remembered the first room that I was taken into when the nurse told me your condition and then the room right next to that where I gave the lady our insurance information. I also saw the table Josh and Debi were sitting at and kept occupied with paper and crayons. When I got back to my seat, I told my dad. He told me he already knew that and how he was hoping I didn't remember or recognize where I was. He said he was surprised considering all that was going on that day. It is weird how my subconscious remembered that dark corner of the wing of the hospital which made me realize where I actually was. I always hoped I never had to go back there and wondered how I would feel if I ever did, but I am proud of myself for sticking it out after I realized where I was. I know you were there to give me the courage to stay and face all that was going through my mind.

I know you are always with me helping me make decisions and giving me strength. That was also proven last Thursday with the issue with the courts. Just when I was about to give up on the bargaining, and worrying if I was doing what was in your best interest and in the best interest of the rest of our families and friends, you made it all clear what I needed to do and I am so glad it worked out in our favor. Now I just hope that we can get through the next week and two days and make that bargain stick on record so you will finally be able to rest and all of us here left without you will be able to find some sort of closure.

I love you Duke more than anything in the world. Thank you for standing behind me and keeping me strong. You have the upper hand now and I know you will always be there with me.

Love ya,
Jenn

Jennifer Aaron
Duke's Wife

August 16, 2005

Hey my Snookums,

I was just issuing a Fireworks Permit for P.G. County and the date of the display distracted me because the date is Sept. 9th, which is our wedding date. Needless to say, it has stopped me from concentrating on my work and I just had to write to you. This September 9th will be our 5 year wedding anniversary. We would have been leaving for vacation around that time. The other day, Shannon asked me if I wanted to go to Williamsburg next month. I told her I was not ready to go back there because that is where you and I spent our last anniversary trip together (and last vacation together for that matter) and that is where we were to have been last year. When she asked me, I got a sickening feeling in my stomach. I always get that feeling in my stomach when I think of Williamsburg or see advertisements on television for it.

Speaking of Shannon, she and I went to the Motley Crue concert at Nissan Pavilion on Saturday (yes by ourselves and yes we were nuts to go by ourselves, but I know you were looking out for us so I was okay with that). Babe, I must admit, it was more entertaining that the Def Leppard concert we all went to a couple years back. It was the first time I ever drove to Virginia. You were always the one that would drive when we would take long road trips. I was telling Shannon how you got pulled over by a Virginia cop on your way back from Nissan Pavilion that one concert you went to several years ago. I told her how Virginia is strict on their traffic enforcement and how you really thought you were doomed and was going to get a ticket, but the cop was nice to you and just told you to slow down. Oh babe, you would have loved that concert. It was a combination of Nite Shift/Fantasies meets the freak side show at a circus. They played all their old stuff and it was all four original band members. While we were driving to the concert, we were listening to Skid Row. I started laughing when the song “A Piece of Me” came on. I remember you and I had just left Texaco in my car and was heading to take care of the follow-up work that had to be done on my car. You started singing the song and then looked over at me and said, “I bet you never heard that song on the radio” because you would say how I only knew the songs that were played on the radio. I started laughing at you and was so impressed that you still new every lyric of that song considering your taste in music had switched to country. You always thought it was funny how your aunt hated that one shirt you got from Joe for being in Cindy and his wedding and you would wear it anyway to torment her and how your mom didn’t want you to listen to heavy metal music as a teenager, but you did anyway. I loved it when you would get into your rock mood and we would listen to it from time to time in the truck and how you knew every single song by heart. You have a collection of heavy metal tapes under our bed in that tape holder you made in school. I always loved (and still do) looking at the variety of tapes you had and listening to them once in awhile. I remember you bought Guns-N-Roses Greatest Hits cd not to long before the crash. I almost bought that, but you got to it before I did. What really shocked me was that you owned two Kid Rock cd’s and I didn’t know you had them until one day we were driving in your truck and you popped it into your cd player. You thought I had known about them and chuckled cause I was so surprised. Kevin got you into listening to Kid Rock when we visited him, Mary and the kids in West Virginia the first time we ever went down to see them. He played the song “Cowboy” for you and you really liked it cause it sounded like southern rock. Plus you said that Kid Rock must be okay if Hank Williams, Jr. was one of his friends. You always hated my taste in music, unless it was a country or classic rock songs, and you weren’t ashamed to tell people about my variety of music I listened to and your feelings about it. No matter if it were your truck or the two cars, WPOC was always on or an alternate country station if there were commercials. I had no say in what type of music we were going to listen to and if I turned something else on, we would go back and forth switching the channels. Once in a while if it were something I truly wanted to listen to, I would beg you to listen to it and you would give in, but practically all of the time it was country music. It drove you nuts (you were a chronic complainer and it was pretty cute how you complained about it) how WPOC was becoming nothing but commercials. We didn’t take my car to many places, but you liked the fact that I had XM radio in my car and how the country station was commercial free. Oh I miss you turning off my radio stations when you would drive my car and I miss you complaining about WPOC.

As if seeing an application for fireworks on the day of our wedding isn’t bad enough, I am now on the phone with Kim and she and Mike had to have Tyson (remember how friendly he was and how much he slobbered) put to sleep today. He contracted one of those doggie viruses (that you wouldn’t be able to pronounce so don’t worry I won’t tell you what he actually had) that was pretty much fatal. Kim told Tyson not to worry and that her mom’s dog Ralphie (remember how mean Ralphie was) would be there to greet him once he got to heaven and that you would be there to protect him. Please Duke, look after Tyson for Kim and Mike. They are not doing very well right now and neither am I after hearing this horrible news. It makes me want to go home and grab Amber, Rocky, Daisy, and Blackie and love them even more. Of course, they wouldn’t understand, but they do understand when I am upset and they still try to comfort me by laying on me or being close by. As a matter of fact, the other day, I told Amber that we were going to go bye-bye’s and see daddy. Well she must have thought I said go see daddy cause she perked up, sprung off the bed and made a dash down the steps. She came back up and looked a little puzzled. I felt like crap after the fact for telling her that. Instead, I just grabbed her leash and out the door we both went to visit you at the cemetery. Every time I get back in the car after visiting your grave, Amber always comes over to me and licks me. She knows more than I think a lot of people would give pets credit for knowing. I can still hear you say “come on Am” or “its alright Am” or “Amber go bye-bye’s with mommy and daddy”. I can still hear you say “come on Amber, come on Rocky, come on Daisy, come on Blackie” before I go to sleep every night. And I can still hear you say, “I love you” after I tell you I love you before I go to sleep every night like we always did to each other.

Well I better get my tears wiped off my face and start concentrating on my work cause the sooner I get it done, the sooner I get to go home. I just wish you would be there on the steps or in front of the Play Station in your recliner to greet me with Amber by your side or one of the cats on your lap when I got there. I love you more than anything in the world.

Love ya,
Jenn

Jennifer Aaron
Duke's Wife

August 15, 2005

Jenn -

I was just reading through the reflections you have left for Duke and they are all really sweet. I come here every now and again to just check up on things - even though I have never met you or Duke. I know Daniel has met Duke though and they are probably great friends. I have heard wonderful things about you and look forward to meeting you someday in DC.

I hope you are doing well. Take Care and thanks for the reflections that you have left for Daniel in the past. They really mean alot.

Love,
Jessica Ruhl
Fiancee of Police Officer Dan Starks
Ft Myers PD EOW 10.25.03

August 12, 2005

Hi Jenn,

I am taking my lunch and I thought I would say hi! Sometimes your reflections make me sad but sometimes they make me crack up, too! I could use that on a Monday!!! I read your most recent one about the 'close calls' Duke had before and also about that pajama party you had at your house with all the little girls. That really made me laugh!

My husband had a close call once. It was almost the same senario as Duke. He was sitting on the side of the road at night and he saw headlights coming real fast down the road. As they got closer, he realized the person was driving on the shoulder of the road where he was. He told me he just braced himself b/c he thought he was going to get hit from behind. At the last second the guy realized he was on the shoulder and quickly swerved. It made me pretty nervous when he told me that. he told me the guy was probably drunk b/c drunks are attracted to the lights on the top of the car.

I hope everything else is going well and that your summer turned out to be good. It is almost over already! Are your little animals doing ok? I bet the heat has them pretty lethargic. I know my dog doesn't want to move when it is this hot.

Anyway, I was thinking about you and I hope someday I will get to tell you in person how brave you are and how much you have been a role model to a lot of people who are hurting and have gone through the same thing you have.

Keep Smiling!!!!

Kim Haynes

August 8, 2005

Dear Duke,
I am so sorry that I did not have the honor and privelege of meeting you while you were on this Earth. Fortunately, I am being given the chance to learn about you and your life through your beautiful wife, Jenn. We have been talking over the past few weeks and I am so glad to have her as a fellow survivor and friend.
Dearest Jenn,
Thank you for all of your words of wisdom, encouragement and most of all your recent friendship. I can't wait until we finally meet in person. Remember that there is always a place for you to stay in Southern California whenever you want to come out for fun in the sun :)
Love,

Juli Verkler
Widow of Ptlm. Bryan S. Verkler EOW 12/13/03

August 4, 2005

Hey baby,

I don’t know why I think the things I do on my way to work, but this morning, I was thinking about the three times you were involved in what could have been more serious incidents then what they turned out to be. The first one was when you were on your way home from work while you were still a cadet and you crashed your brown pick-up truck into the telephone poll. You had just gotten off the phone with me about five minutes or so prior to the accident. Someone had pulled out from Shan T’s parking lot in front of you on Solley Road and you swerved around them and hit the telephone poll. I will never forget your mom calling me all upset to tell me you were at the hospital. I went to go to the hospital, but my mom wouldn’t let me because I was so upset that she was afraid I would get into an accident rushing to get to you and just told me to let your mom handle the situation and wait. Witnesses found you wondering around outside your truck and you didn’t remember anything. I remember calling your sister in a panic a little later that morning to find out if you were okay and if it would be all right to come over to see you. When I got to your parents house (because you still lived at home at the time), you were sitting at the breakfast bar eating cereal. Your back was bruised up and you had a couple little scratches on you. You said you were all right, but you were sore and tired. When we got to see your truck, it was totaled. The front of the truck had the indentation of the poll in the center of the hood and bumper, the truck cab was cracked clear across on the floor, you caved in the passenger side of the dash with your body and the windshield was cracked. It wasn’t funny at the time, but remember how everyone would joke with you about owning your own telephone poll. And remember how the bushes that were crushed by the truck remained crushed and never grew back. I was looking at the pictures you took of that mess the other day. I guess that is why it was still on my mind this morning.

The one experience we both shared together was when we still lived in the apartment and you worked the 3p to 11p shift. You were just driving on pitch dark wooded Rt. 50 on the Shore side and talking to me on the phone at the same time. The next thing I heard on my end of the phone was glass shatter and you saying “oh ----, I’m being shot at”. Then the next thing I heard was a dial tone. I started crying and immediately called my dad. I explained what happened and he said he would look into the situation for me. I remember sitting on the couch crying with the phone in my hand just patiently waiting for it to ring and all these horrible thoughts going through my head about what was happening to you. It seemed so long before I heard back from my dad, but it wasn’t and when he called me back, he said that you were okay and that dispatch had you on the radio, while he was on the phone with whoever he was talking to over there, and someone else responded to your location as well. My dad said he could actually hear you talking on the radio so he ensured me that you were all right. You did call me after everything was taken care of and I was so glad to hear your voice and you kept saying “I’m okay, I’m okay” because I just bombarded you with questions in a panicking voice. Come to find out, your defoggers were the cause of your back windshield shattering. You had turned on the defoggers because it was hot and humid outside and your air conditioner was on in the car and when your back windshield started to fog up, you turned on the defoggers, which in return caused the windshield to shatter. No sooner you came in the door that night, I grabbed you and just hugged you. I was so glad you were home and you were safe.

Then there was that time you and a couple of your co-workers were doing traffic stops on Rt. 50 and no sooner you left the spot, a car flipped and landed in that exact same spot you all had just left. You were so shocked and could not believe that had happened and all you kept saying was how you could have been there and the car could have landed on you guys and how you could have possibly have been killed. That bothered you that your lives could have been lost in an instant like that. The situation that took your life was in an instant. My how things that go around come back around in a sense. It’s not fair.

I just got word from my mom that little Katie is going to be released from the hospital after spending three days there fighting viral meningitis. Just when I thought I could get July over with and start August off on a good note, this happens to her. Can you believe she will be two months old already in a couple of days? She is a strong little girl Duke if they are letting her come home this early. I don’t know all the specifics, but I know that the doctors and nurses worked aggressively for the past several days to make sure she received her antibiotics and fluids to keep her strength up. I am sure you were there to make sure she got through it as well. Luckily she is so young that she won’t remember this experience. It upset me the other day when I was there to see her hooked up to all the monitors and the i.v. in her little arm. They made us wear gloves and gowns. That experience sucked! The other week (I am going to embarrass you now so don’t get upset and blush), she had a little pimple on her left upper cheek. I laughed and said how she was already taking after her uncle and she wasn’t even out of diapers yet. It was in the exact same spot you always got those one’s you complained about.

Several weeks back, I got to spend the morning at the Crystal Palace pool at one of Brittney and Hannah’s swim meets. Both of them did extremely well. Brittney’s little boyfriend Zack was there and of course, I did the right thing and embarrassed her the best that I could :) You and I were good at embarrassing her every chance we got weren’t we? Every time I look at our television remote, I laugh at how Brittney had her 12th birthday party at our house and how all these preteens spent the night and they made you sit in a chair and asked you about boys. Then they asked us about how we met. I felt like we were sitting in front of an interview board. It was cute. They also threatened to put make-up on you. You were totally freaked out at having all those girls in our house and how all they talked about was boys. You just wanted to hide upstairs the entire time. Then when we couldn’t find the television remote after they all left, you swore Sam must have taken it because she was a prankster. Remember how we teased her about that? You were on a manhunt for that remote. You called your sister and made her call all the girls to look in their stuff. The girls did look in their stuff and none of them had it. We looked everywhere for that remote and the day you took the old couch to the dump, there it was, but you had already purchased another remote. You even looked in the couch and didn’t see it and it magically appeared all those months later. Can you believe Brittney will be fourteen in a couple weeks? Unbelievable!

Well my Snookums, I guess I should get back to work, even though I would rather not be here because it is sunny outside. I love you Duke.

Love,
Jenn

Jennifer Aaron
Duke's Wife

August 4, 2005

Jen-

Everyday I log onto this site, I find myself coming to Duke's memorial page. Now, from reading your last reflection, I just had to leave a message. I don't know how you do it! I can honestly say that you have to be one of the strongest people out there.

As I sit and read this reflections that have been left for Duke, it breaks my heart to know that you have lost such a kind soul. When you look back on all of your cherished memories and share them with all of us, there are times where I can't hold back the tears.

I know you just passed the one year mark of that tragic day and I would like to extend my deepest sympathies. I just don't know how you do it. God Bless you and your family. Take care and God Bless.

August 3, 2005

Hey my Snookums

I have been thinking a lot about our first date the past couple of days, along with a couple of other times. When July 10th came this past year, I believe I told you in a prior reflection to you that I didn't even catch on that it was the 10th. It may have been for the better. We would have been together 11 years. I remember the first time I heard your voice when Mrs. Dawn gave me your phone number. I was baby sitting Katelyn and Molly for Mrs. Beth and her husband. I decided to call you from their house and got your answering machine. I thought you sounded kind of cute, but I didn't have any pictures to go with the voice so of course I was still nervous about the whole blind date thing. You were at work at the time I had called you because I realized that after I left the message of who I was and why I was calling. You worked at Tunnel Command mostly at Fort McHenry Tunnel at the time on the 2p to 10p shift doing truck checks with CVSD. That was during the time the Toll Facilities Police were in transition to become the Transportation Authority Police. Anyway, you and I finally got in touch with each other and agreed to go to the movies to see Speed. You didn't know it at the time that I had already seen Speed and that Keanu Reeves was totally hot and I didn't tell you that until after the movie was over (you hated Keanu Reeves and Johnny Depp throughout our entire relationship and said the only reasons I liked their movies was because they were in them and you would do impressions of Keanu Reeves making him sound stupid and dopy which would always make me laugh). We agreed on July 10, 1004 as the day we would finally meet each other. I told my uncle how there had to be something wrong with you and that I probably wasn't going to like you and he told me that he would bet a hot fudge sundae from McDonalds that I was going to like you. I will never forget you pulling up in front of my house in your brand new white F150 Ford pick-up truck you got right after you got your job. You had jeans on and as you were walking up my grandma's sidewalk, I was looking at you from my grandma's front window and I made a comment and my uncle said that I owed him the hot fudge sundae. Okay, I thought you were cute and I admitted that to him. I remember I wore my dark blue jean shorts and my top that was blue and plaid which resembled a tank top kind of. I kept that outfit remember? Well you came in and met some of the family and we were told that dinner would be waiting for us after the movie so we didn't have to buy anything. I also had a prior commitment to go to Dulles Airport in a limo to take Rosa's mother there to fly back to her country with Rosa, Leroy, Grant, my mom, Mr. Phil, and Mark so I had to be back in time for that as well. I remember the entire trip to the mall was mostly me talking and asking you questions because you were so quiet (imagine that). Well we sat in the middle section on the right side of the movie theater at the old Golden Ring Mall. I don't remember which portion of the movie it was, but you grabbed my hand and held it to the end of the movie. We continued to hold hands after the movie was over as we walked through the mall. Then it was time to go back to my grandma's house for dinner. I remember she had mashed potatoes and roast beef. We were all starring at you because you put a tiny bit of potatoes on your plate. Then everyone started laughing and my mom told you that you didn't have to be shy and could take as much as you wanted. And that you did. Mashed potatoes were one of your favorite foods. After dinner, we all rushed out the door because the limo pulled up. I gave you a quick hug and told you I would talk to you later. From that day on, you became a permanent family member.

I remember the first time I basically met your entire family. It was at Brittney's 3rd birthday party one day in August (now looking back it had to be close to her birthday or on her birthday, but I wasn't paying attention to the actual date). I remember how I felt so sorry for your sister because she was so pregnant with Hannah and it was summer and really hot. I also remember the day that you introduced me to Chris, Dawn, little Chris and Mona. That was at a birthday party in Mona's back yard for Chris. I remember Dawn was so pregnant with Nick and it was really hot that day as well. I will never forget the first time my dad found out you and I were dating. You had stopped over on your lunch break and my family and I were out back swimming. I got out of the pool and plopped my butt on your lap because there was no other place to sit. Well my dad decided to apparently take his lunch break the same time you did because he walked around back, looked at you and said "what are you doing here?" He was surprised to see you and everyone there with us started laughing and I said that I forgot to tell him about you and I and how we were dating. I am pretty sure it was awkward for him to see his little girl in a bikini (but wrapped in a towel) sitting on a guys lap, but hey. You even laughed and he started joking with you and asked you if it was time for you to get back to work. Oh I would give anything to be able to relive those days.

I will never forget our official first kiss. It was on August 8, 1994 after a family member of mine got married. We were standing up at the entrance of Dundalk High School's track and it happened. I will never forget the gourmet jelly belly jelly bean scenario my cousin Colleen came up with earlier that day as we sat at the reception that lead up to that kiss. I miss your kisses. We were never shy when it came to showing public display of affection aka PDA's were we? We were always holding hands, or hugging each other, or giving each other kisses and telling each other we loved each other no matter where we were. We bought our house the end of July 2000. You only wanted to live here five years and then look for a single family rancher with a big yard. You only got to enjoy almost four years here, but they were four years of happiness. Between the hard work that both our families and friends of the families put into making this house in liveable condition for us before we moved in and all the home improvements you did and were proud of doing throughout the years, I am so glad I have those memories. August 26th is another one of our many anniversary dates. On August 26, 1995 you proposed to me in the lifeguard chair on 75th Street in Ocean City at 7:50p (how ironic was that). After we got down from the lifeguard chair, you got down on one knee and proposed to me again because you wanted to propose the traditional way. I had mentioned in a past reflection the events that lead up to that proposal. I took pictures of the street sign and the view looking out into the ocean remember? That day was also the day of your grandfather's brother Uncle Bus's retirement party and we headed down the ocean after attending the party for awhile. I was working at Box-N-Save at the time because I got off of work and then we went to the party and on to the Ocean.

Then there was Halloween 2003. Sharon and Rick pulled their cars out of their driveway and we pulled our cars out of ours and we sat together giving out candy. Remember we had a huge spider problem all over the place and how you stumbled upon that gigantic brown one that had made a web in between two of the bushes out front. Sharon and I were talking about that tonight when we went to Starbucks. Remember how the spider made a perfect web in between the bushes and you put a flashlight on it. We made him a holiday lawn ornament and named him Sparky. Remember how people were wanting to go up to it thinking it was fake (we had in addition to Sparky some tomb stones with monsters coming out of the ground in front of them, lighted statues, lights in our windows and on our house, spooky music playing and carved pumpkins) and everyone was screaming "no he's real, don't touch him". We had gotten a lot of compliments and a lot of laughs on having Sparky as our main attraction. He wasn't there the next morning remember? I didn't see him last year and I actually did look.

Well my love, it is getting late and I should be getting to bed. I know, I can hear you say I stay up to late anymore, but it is at nights before I go to bed that I just want to talk to you and think about the wonderful experiences and memories we shared in over the ten years that we had together. The memories are endless.

I love you more than anything in the whole wide world. Sleep tight my love.

Love,
Jenn

Jennifer Aaron
Duke's Wife

August 1, 2005

Jenn,
Wow you got tears streaming down my face. And you know that takes a lot. This was the first day I could bring myself to come back to read what you left for Duke. As I sat reading your last days and moments with Duke I cried. I have heard you speak of it in person but tonight it just broke my heart. As I sat here imagining your pain and suffering during those days when your world ended...I reflected on the days when my world ended also. I reflected on my last precious moments with Brandy. It is so strange that after 9 months there are days that it just slaps me in the face and I don't think that it is real. Or those little moments that just hit you, you are cruising along fine, getting through the days, even managing to smile and some small memory strikes you that knocks you to your knees. There are times that I want to hold him so bad that my whole body hurts or hear his voice, his laugh...of course you know all of this.

You made me think of moments that I try to block from my memory. Someone wrote to me and said sometimes you just wrap the pain deep inside yourself to get through the days....my how wise they are. We couldn't function if we didn't. I guess we have to let it out occasionally or we will make ourselves insane. You were my outlet tonight girl. I am wiping my nose on my t-shirt as we speak...okay I still have to have a sense of humor to make it.....

Missing you bunches. We need to have a spontaneous trip again. The door is always open at my house, amish country is waiting for our shopping spree. The old women at BINGO would love to have another youngin invade their tables too. OH IO is waiting for you. I miss you bunches. I will talk to Bran tonight and remind him not to accept any Twinkies from Duke and they better not share any Looper's Field stories either........

Love ya bunches girl...

Sara

July 30, 2005

Duke, I keep you picture on my desk at home as a reminder of what a dedicated Officer you were. I enjoyed being your instructor for defensive tactics while you were in the training academy. You came into the class as a shy, slim recruit, but showed many of us what you were really made of. You never once complained,you followed instructions and you made me proud to have known you.
Your excitement for the job will never be forgotten....your passion for the job will never be forgotten....and most of all, the courage you displayed to be out there day in and day out...keeping our state safe will never be forgotten.
Jenn...take care, and God Bless.

Officer Gregory J. Day
MD Transportation Authority PD

July 28, 2005

Mrs. Aaron,

Over the past year I have come in here and read your letters to Duke. Thank you for sharing them with us all. As the wife of an officer I know that at any moment he can be taken from me. Tonight, as he left for work I said a silent prayer as I always do that he will return home to me. But that is not a guarantee. I can honestly say that reading your letters to Duke has made us a stronger couple. Instead of a quick goodbye as he is walking out the door, I spend time talking to him as he is getting dressed. I walk him to his car every night he works. In my driveway it has become my sort of ritual to kiss him one more time, give him a hug and tell him I love him. I have learned you can never say I love you enough. I think with the recent murder of Steve Gaughan he also takes time to do and say things he never did before. He will make sure to say he loves me, waves as he is driving away and call me after roll call to say he loves me again. Thank you for sharing your letters. I can only hope that if my husbands life is taken from me, that I will be as strong as you are. You are an inspiration to many people, and have touched more lives than you can ever imagine. May god bless you and your family. You will always be in my prayers.

PGPD officers wife

July 28, 2005

Your past reflections have brought me to tears. Thank you for sharing such intimate details of those days. As the wife of a state trooper, I realize that your nightmare could one day be my reality and it makes me appreciate him even more. You have passed on a valuable lesson to all of us and for that I thank you. I pray for you and hope you and your family can one day find peace in your hearts. May God bless you and keep you always!

July 28, 2005

I can hardly believe how fast the past year has gone. I never had the pleasure of meeting you Duke, but I know my Husband thought very highly of you. I think about you and Jenn every day. I could not be prouder of all of the Officers with the MDTA. God be with each and every one, I already know that you, Duke, are looking out for them all.

Proud Wife
MDTA Police

July 27, 2005

Hey my Snookums,

One year ago today was the last time I saw you before I was forced to close the lid on your casket. When I got to the funeral home, there were so many people lined up on the street. There were so many cops from all over, including out of state there to honor you. As we were walking through the gauntlet, Lt. Garrison whispered to me in my ear to take it all in. It was so quiet and peaceful that you could have heard a pin drop. There was a subtle breeze and the honor guard flags were blowing in it. All the officers were standing at attention. I picked a blood-orange rose from out of our garden and placed it in your hand when I got inside the funeral home. I will never forget Steve sitting behind me through the entire ceremony. He had me laughing for a moment because he mentioned how he wanted to speak about you the night before, but he didn't think that talking about Looper's Field would have been appropriate. I thanked him for not getting up there. I am sure you are glad as well. Richard came over and hugged and kissed me. I sat on the end of the row next to my dad, who was sitting next to my mom and Mr. Phil. Mark, Mary, and Stephanie were behind me. As the ceremony got started, Captain Wilkins lead off the ceremony followed by the Lt. Governor, Secretary of MDOT, your mom's assistant pastor at her church, a unique monsignor who memorialized your passion for coffee (don't ask how he got off on a coffee tangent, but hey, you loved coffee so it was alright). PJ spoke about you getting stuck in the swamp/pond and how you broke a windshield on a patrol car with a nerf football as a cadet (I remember you coming over my house scared to death that you were going to get into big trouble for doing that after work that night). Then Glenn spoke. I know you were proud of your boy Duke. As Glenn spoke, I looked around the room at the rest of the posse and other co-workers of yours. My heart just ached for them Duke. There wasn't a dry eye in that entire room. Those that I never ever would have guessed would have been in tears were. Looking at them actually made me realize how rough the situation was not just on me, but for all of them. You truly had an impact on everyone in that room, upstairs in the overflow rooms, and outside. Glenn's speech makes me speechless even to this day. It was beautiful that is all I can really say. He did talk about him being the Twinkie victim and how you poured Taco Bell hot sauce into the Twinkie that you hollowed out (with your dirty pocket "universal" knife) and placed where he could steal your food away from you (which he did) and eat it. I will never forget you coming home that day and how proud you were that you actually came up with that prank yourself and how Glenn was so surprised you did that to him. After everyone spoke, Keith stepped up to you and took your badge off of you. He then saluted you. Then the ceremony was concluded and it was time to close your casket. That was something I didn't want to do. I kissed you for the very last time and put a white blanket over your body. And as I closed the lid on you, I touched you until the lid was ready to close on my hand before I had to pull it out. While this was happening, we got word that a couple of officers standing at attention outside had fallen out because of the heat. Your pallbearers from the funeral home to the hearse were your civilian friends and family. They took your flag draped coffin through the gauntlet and placed you into the hearse.

As everyone lined up in the procession to the cemetery, little kids and their parents were standing and sitting on the side of the road with signs in their hands thanking you and blessing us and our families. I watched an extremely long line of police cars pass us by before it was our turn to join in the line. I was told through the media coverage that your funeral procession was five miles long. I was also told through the media that your crash made a ten mile backup which was the largest backup due to an accident in Maryland history. I don't know how true all of that was because we are talking about the media delivering that information so who knows. As we were driving in the procession, there were so many people lined up along Rt. 100 and Rt. 10 and all above us on the overpasses. There were people of all ages saluting you, covering their hearts with their hands and holding signs of thanks to you for your service. I even saw signs that said you were a hero. As we turned off of Rt. 10 onto Furnace Branch Road then onto Ritchie Highway, we were going against traffic to the cemetery because they shut down Ritchie Highway for your funeral. There were so many people lining Ritchie Highway and all the businesses were even standing out front. The K-9 officers and their handlers were saluting you as we drove past them. The police horses were standing at attention as we passed them and passed under a large American flag that was suspended in air by two fire trucks. As we entered the cemetery, your copper vault cover was sitting at the very front of the entrance with all of your information engraved on it. Then we pulled up to the grave site. I watched as the posse removed your casket from the hearse. I could see them all looking at each other and I knew what they were thinking. Because of all the stuff I put in your casket the night before, your casket was pretty weighed down and the posse knowing that you were not really big realized that your casket had more weight to it than they expected (I later explained to them what was in your casket). Plus your casket was made of solid mahogany wood which also carried a lot of weight. I sat in my seat under the tent after we reached your grave site. Your grandmom was to the left of me and your mom was to the right. I listened to the prayers and speeches being made, I watched the honor guard fold your flag and both the flag on your casket and the State flag where given to me. PJ gave me your hat. You were given a twenty-one gun salute and a fly over. Then came the hard part. Mrs. Dawn gave you your final call and then placed you out of service. When I found out she was doing that, she told me how she didn't think she could do it. I told her that she was the reason we were together (since she hooked us up on our blind date back in 1994 and gave us ten years and ten days of happiness together) and that it was only right that she be the one to give the final call to you. All the radios all over the entire State went silent for that minute.

After we left the cemetery, the department invited everyone back to Michael's Eigth Avenue for a reception. I stood in a receiving line thanking people for coming until I was actually forced to leave because they were cleaning up. Lechner walked up to me and said that he promised me that he would take care of you till the very end and that he did. He stood there with you at your grave until the last drop of sand covered your vault. I am forever grateful for him doing that for you. Then it was time for me to go home. I watched the news that night and they showed your grave. There were mounds and mounds of flowers all over it and there were still people coming to see you and bringing you flowers during the news casting. I went to see it for myself the next day and it must have been a little kid that did this because someone left you two matchbox cars on your grave as well. To this day, I don't remember much about last year after you were buried. The only thing I do remember is that I was missing you like crazy and to this day, I miss you like crazy. I miss us Duke. I miss everything.

I love you more than anything in the world. Sleep tight my love.

Love you,
Jenn

Jennifer Aaron
Duke's Wife

July 26, 2005

Hey my Snookums,

I mentioned to you on the 20th how I remembered everything about your funeral. Well a year ago on the 23rd was the first time I got to see you since I left you at the hospital after you had passed away. Your viewing was at the funeral home you specifically told me you wanted to be laid out at. Your department came and escorted me to the funeral home every day and the motorcycle unit cleared the way for a speedy arrival and exit. Alton was my escort for the entire event. Lechner was your bodyguard for the entire event from the hospital to the cemetery. However, there were so many officers of all ranks that were of great assistance and support throughout the entire event and I am forever grateful for everything they all did for you and for me.

When I got to the funeral home, I remember rushing past everyone and running up to see you. I kissed your forehead, nose and lips and just touched you all over. I knew that for the next four days that I would be able to be with you and touch and kiss you as much as I wanted. I had you laid out in your Class A's because I thought it was more appropriate for the situation. Sorry about the two stripes, but you know that was taken care of. The guards were next to your casket and Jeannie was one of the first one's and I went over to her and gave her a kiss on the cheek. You had so many flowers in all the rooms they had that I told the funeral home director that if they had to that it would be okay to start lining them up on the outside around the funeral home. I knew no one would steal them because your fellow co-workers were spending the nights with you at the funeral home. When I found that out, I knew you were in good hands and it was extremely comforting to know you were not alone. I was not alone either. Every night since your death and up until you were buried, I had an officer around the clock out in front of our house. Don't worry, they were taken care of. Rick and Sharon always welcomed them over to their house and my dad put a cooler loaded with drinks out front for them as well. I met some really cool cops that entire week. One of them was a former NBA player. I meant to get his autograph, but never did. I treated one of the guys to Starbucks. He never had their coffee before then.

Gosh, there were hundreds (probably even a thousand) of people that came to visit you throughout the three day viewing. I was determined to stand there next to you and greet everyone that I could and thank them for coming to honor you. Alton had to practically drag me to dinner each night otherwise, I would have stayed and continued to greet people. The one thing I told the funeral director was to never turn anyone who wanted to see you away. I told them that I didn't care if it were past 9p that I didn't want the receiving line cut off and that I was wanting to stay there until the last person came through no matter what time it was. The line was so long that it started forming around the funeral home. Every night that I left you, I was never alone. I would go home and go over Rick and Sharon's or be with my family and friends. Kevin, Mary and the kids were all there and we would stay up until 2a or so. Then I would come home and be back up by 5a. I was usually dodging the media and would go shopping for whatever outfit I was going to wear for that day. Shopping for a new outfit to wear every day of your viewing was a pain in the rear but it got me out of the house so I didn't have to watch the media roam up and down our street like lost dogs waiting for someone to talk to them.

On the 24th viewing, my aunt, uncle and cousins flew in from Michigan. Well everyone wanted to go to Cheers after the viewing and give a toast to you (thank Joy and Wildwood, NJ for the "to much information" on what she was toasting to) and sing karaoke in your honor. On the 25th viewing, we named it "Friends and Family Night". My brother actually came up with that bright idea. We all came to the funeral home dressed like you would normally see us dressed. Everyone was asked to wear their normal street clothes since we were all dressed up the two prior days. I wore my jeans. That was also the night anyone who wanted to reflect on you and your life was able to do that. Beckette and Stan got up and spoke about you. So did Cpl. Prioleau and my dad. And so did I. I wanted everyone to know what a wonderful man and husband you were. That was also the night I loaded your casket with all your favorite and cherished possessions that I gathered from all over our house. You know what you took with you and I wouldn't have had it any other way. That was your stuff and I felt it was best that you take it with you. I did give Kevin and one of your beers though. I didn't think you would have minded because I knew you would have been right there drinking them with them. Kevin took another one home and he still has it and he said he will never open it.

I love you more than anything in the world my Snookums. Sleep tight my love.

Love you,
Jenn

Jennifer Aaron
Duke's Wife

July 23, 2005

Duke...
Tonight we took flowers over to your memorial...There are so many beautiful flowers there..We all miss you so much...
Jenn...hope all is well and stay strong...I pray for you all the time

Teresa
Fiance of Officer Jordan( Bay Bridge)

July 20, 2005

Duke,

Well my friend it has been a year since I received that terrible phone call. I was sitting in a training class when Kim called me and gave me the devestating news. It has been a tough year my friend. I miss you man. I hope you enjoyed the drink I left for you. The three of us visited the roadside memorial as well as the cemetary today. We saw the butterfly fly infront of our car on RT 50 on our way home from the memorial. I know it was you saying hello. In spite of the sad day, I did have a tremendous interview that went really well. I drew strength even though I was very sad today. You still touch the lives of people, even a year after you have gone. I had a friend who is in the fire department, email me yesterday and wished us all well for today. Duke, I must tell you man, that is a strong lady you married. I admire her courage and how she thinks of others feelings first. I will continue to look out for her, as I promised you. Rest in Peace my dear friend, until we meet again.

Stan

July 20, 2005

Hey my Snookums,

Well I made it through the day. So you didn't want me to spend it with you at the cemetery all day did ya? That's why you made sure that it was extremely sunny and hot (since it has done nothing but rain or has been cloudy all week up until today) and that I saw Sharon, my dad, Mary, little Debi and Katie and oh the men that were conveniently mowing the grass with the loud mowers and weed-wackers. Stuff works out in mysterious ways don't it. But thank you for letting me come back later as the sun was setting and it was cooler and much more peaceful and it was just you and I there alone together. When Mary asked little Debi if she was there to bring Uncle Duke flowers she shook her head yes. That broke my heart. And how about Katie? She fussed a little, but for the most part, she was content with Sharon just looking around. I wrote to you at midnight this morning as I was reflecting on this day last year. I will be quite honest. It was more torturous and agonizing waiting for this day to come than actually going through this day. I knew it was only up to me as to how hard or how accepting I was going to make it for myself. Up until 6a this morning, I can't look back anymore at this time last year and say that we were doing this and we were doing that. I remember exactly what was going on after you passed away up until the day of your burial, but after that, I don't have much of a recollection of last year. The one thing I do remember is that I lost you and my world was shattered and I am now trying to piece together some sort of decent living arrangements to live out the rest of my life. Again, it will be up to me how hard or accepting I will make that life.

I miss you so much Duke. We lived and breathed each other for exactly ten years and ten days. We shared so much together that no one will ever be able to take away from us. I made a comment earlier to you how I felt like other people seem to think their names are on our marriage certificate sometimes because there are situations that are beyond my control. But when I come home and I look around our house and our pictures and I think back to all our cherished conversations and personal moments, I know whose names are on that marriage certificate and I know the man you truly were. No one will ever be able to take that away from me. Someone quoted to me in a card I received yesterday "Death doesn't end the relationship, it simply forges a new type of relationship - one based not on physical presence, but on memory, spirit, and love" and "There is only one way to live without grief in one's lifetime - that is to exist without love - your grief represents your humanness, just as your love does". We will one day be together again.

I love you more than anything in the world. Sleep tight my love.

Love,
Jenn

Jennifer Aaron
Duke's Wife

July 20, 2005

Duke,
As you know we lost Grant Saturday. Please look after him, after all you are one of the old guys now. Grant makes two I have lost since being in the academy. God willing there will not ever be another. We all miss you and that silly smirk. Take care of Grant.

Lt. R.D.Perry
MdTA

July 20, 2005

Jenn,
Tried to call today but I see you are spending the day with Duke. I hope you are hanging in there. I know it has been a tough few weeks. Stay strong. You know you can come to OH IO anytime that you need. We are all here and we love you.

And tell Duke to watch out Landon is going to hit a baseball to heaven so his Daddy can catch it. Make sure they have on their catcher's mitts.

Missing you girl. Call if you need to talk. Love you.

Sara

July 20, 2005

Jenn,
For in your heart Duke lingers on
Remembering His smile,laugh & special ways will comfort you from day to day
You'll feel his presence in the breeze
And it's his face you'll see
When you're in need of company
At any time you can recall
The Love you shared..you saved it All
And really more than anything
You'll find peace in remembering
Kristine , Barb & I were together at the site today, I hope you felt our prayers to you
Today was tough,but tonite will be worse, I've known this loneliness for almost 7 years.
May God's light always be with your
your friend,
Martha

Martha

July 20, 2005

Hey Duke,

I see today marks one year since you have passed. I came across your reflections from reading Brandy Winfields reflections. I come on here daily and quitely read the letters your wife writes and I can see that she loves and misses you very much as do many other people as well. You and Brandy and many others were taken away from all of us way too soon and we will never know why, but what we do know is that you were out serving and protecting your communities on those tragic days and for that we will always remember you and hold a special place in our hearts for you. You have an amazingly strong wife and I hope she can remain that way as the days go on.

Jenn,

I'm so sorry for your loss. My husband is 29 also and we've been married 9 1/2 years and just don't know what I would do if I were to loose him. You are such a strong lady. I hope that I can be as strong as you are if god forbid anything were to happen to my husband. He is my heart and soul. I know today is extra hard for you, but you just let it be a day for you and Duke and you spend it how you want to. If you want to sit with Duke all day, you do it, if you want to sit in bed and cry all day, you do it. Just know that there are people all over that are thinking of you and what you have been through. Stay strong. You are in my prayers.

Marion, Ohio

Amy Caldwell
High School Classmate Of Brandy Windfield EOW Oct 14 2004

July 20, 2005

Jenn, I just wanted you to know that I was thinking of you today. I know how hard this day is, but you WILL make it. I know that Duke wants you to remember all the good times you both shared, not the events that happened on the worst day of your life. He is ALWAYS by your side and in your heart and in your memories. He never leaves you. Remember that.
Love, Denise

Denise Zimmerman
Surviving Spouse of NJ State Trooper Bert Zimmerman

July 20, 2005