Family, Friends & Fellow Officers Remember...

Well, here's another one for the "unfair" file. Kendall and I were in Boscov's today and I was buying clothing for her and a few men's shirts for gifts. The clerk said to Kendall, "Oooh, did you get some new clothing for spring?" Kendall replied, "Yes". The clerk then said, "And did Daddy get some new shirts, too?" I chimed in and told the clerk that they were gifts. Kendall looked up at me and whispered, "Mommy, I don't have a daddy."

Enough said.

Denise L. Wise
Widow, Michael H. Wise, II EOW 6/5/04

March 20, 2007

Dear Denise ~

I think of you often and would love to talk to you - please give me a call sometime or send me an email. I hope you and Kendall are doing well in your new home. I hope and pray that this is the beginning of a new life for you - a fresh start in a new home surrounded by the love and memories of your wonderful Mike. You've been through so much over the past almost 3 years, I hope you can find a way to close this painful chapter of your life and begin looking forward. You and Kendall deserve it.

Take care Denise and know I am thinking of you both and wishing you many blessings.

Warmly ~
Carin E. Sollman

March 8, 2007

Well, another milestone in Kendall's life has passed by without you here. We just returned from Disney World and she had a blast. She was on "princess overload" and was so happy to meet each princess and get her picture taken with them. She wore a Cinderella dress and glittery updo for 2 days straight. She cried when I washed the goop and glitter out of her hair.

Since our wedding song was from Aladdin it played over the sound system periodically. Even through the noise I could pick out the first few notes and know that our song was coming on again. It makes me sad to listen to the words and remember a time when we thought the world was ours and that our life together would be good and never-ending.

On our last day I took Kendall to the pool at our hotel. She attached herself to a daddy and his three little girls in the pool. He was gracious and polite to her but it made me wonder what he was thinking about this poor little girl who had latched onto him. It made me so sad that she didn't have her own daddy to talk to or play with. My heart hurt for her. She obviously craves that daddy figure in her life and nobody but you can do that for her. YOU are her daddy--nobody else.

I've really been missing how funny and crazy you were. Our trip to Disney would have been a million times more fun if you had been there. You were always telling me to lighten up and it always helped that you were so goofy at times. I really miss that about you. Funny how it annoyed me sometimes and now I crave it. I also crave stability. I still feel lost and am trying to figure out where I'm supposed to go next. It's frustrating and exhausting to feel like I'm always running in circles. It would be nice if I could just relax and enjoy the moment but I find it impossible. I miss you.

Love you.

Denise

Denise L. Wise
Widow, Michael H. Wise, II EOW 6/5/04

March 8, 2007

Mrs Wise,
I have just spent several hours reading the reflections left here.Your Michael sounds a wonderful person and I know he lives on in your heart and mind.I know you will enjoy your new home with your sweet daughter and I am absolutely convinced that your Michael will fill it to the brim with his love and pride in you both.
G-d's Blessings on you.

March 5, 2007

“My Wish”- Rascal Flatts

I hope the days come easy and the moments pass slow,
and each road leads you where you want to go,
and if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,
I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.
And if one door opens to another door closed,
I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window,
if it's cold outside, show the world the warmth of your smile,

But more than anything, more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
your dreams stay big, your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
and while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.

I hope you never look back, but you never forget,
all the ones who love you, in the place you left,
I hope you always forgive, and you never regret,
and you help somebody every chance you get,
Oh, you find God's grace, in every mistake,
and always give more than you take.

But More than anything, Yeah, more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
your dreams stay big, your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
and while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish. Yeah.

My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
your dreams stay big, your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
and while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.

March 5, 2007

Today I took my last walk through our house in Myerstown. There will be new owners living there by the end of next week. It was very upsetting. I stared at Kendall's mural in her room and thought about all the time I spent in that room looking at that wall while taking care of her--particularly the "boogie picker." Those were much happier and less complicated times.

As I was driving away from the house I came across "The Old Apartment" from BNL on the radio. How weird and appropriate since that was the last concert we saw together on Valentine's Day 2004. The song was perfectly queued to the words "This is where used to live." Well, that was enough to push me over the edge. I cried so hard I had to pull over. "Broken memories, faded memories. . .I want them back."

I love you and miss you.

Denise L. Wise
Widow, Michael H. Wise, II EOW 6/5/04

February 16, 2007

I've been haunted by bad dreams about you since you died. Last night was the worst and most emotional one I've experienced yet. It seemed so real. Why is it that I've had only two good dreams about you since you died? Is it my brain's way of coping? I don't like it.

Kendall and I have two more days remaining in this house. It's very weird to see most of our belongings in boxes scattered throughout the house. When I took the photos off the "Daddy wall" in Kendall's bedroom she was upset. She told me that she looks at your pictures and talks to you before she goes to sleep. I gave her one picture so that she could still do that until I put the "Daddy wall" up at our new house. Once the old house is empty I know I will be sad. It will be a very tough day. You'd be happy to know, though, that our new neighborhood has friendly neighbors. I don't know how we got so lucky to get good neighbors in every house we've owned but I'm relieved. Kendall and I have already discussed where we might put her "Daddy tree" at our new house but we'll make a final decision in the Spring.

Love you. Miss you.

Denise

Denise Wise
Widow, Michael H. Wise, II EOW 6-5-04

January 23, 2007

Oh Mike,

It has been a long time since I came to this site. But in the past feww days I have done alot of thinking.
Denise and Kendall are getting ready to move, and all I can think about is me and how it will affect me.
I know you know this, but you have a wonderful wife. The two of you were so wonderful together!!!!!!
She is by far a wonderful mother and all around person. She has been feeling not so goo lately, pepole judging her and just makeing her feel low. She has been through so much!! ANd even though I know that people understand that. They still want to judge.
I feel like all of this happened last year, instead of 2 1/2 years ago. I feel like The phone rang and I was out the door just last year. I can not imagine how she must feel. She is very stong and doing well. But she misses you everyday! And so do the rest of us.. I can still remember the very last words you said to Rod and I on that day that you were taken away from all of us.. You will always be in my heart! Officer Mike you Rock!!!! I am glad I came to this site today, it was nice to see your face!

Marsha VanOverbeke
friend and neighbor

January 23, 2007

Hi Denise,

I just wanted to say that I have been thinking of you and Kendall at this difficult time. I think of you both everyday, truly I do. I wanted to let you know what an honor it was to share dinner with you and Kendall and have the opportunity to finally really talk to one another. I have worn Mike's memorial badge everyday since I've had it including pinning it to my slip on my wedding day. I want you to know how seriously I take the sacrafice your family has payed. I cannot express enough the love I have in my heart for you, it goes very deep. Thank you for your strength and courage. I am always here if you ever need anything at any time.

Love and Friendship to you and Kendall,
Cathy

Cathy Rambo
Wife of Reading Police Officer

December 29, 2006

We got through Christmas number three. We all had our ways of doing that--some less-approved than others--but we did it.

Kendall was playing with Uncle Matt in the front yard at your parents' house on Saturday and she decided to pretend that he was her daddy. She just kept yelling, "Throw that ball here, Daddy." "Daddy, over here!" God, it was weird. Matt just rolled with it but I had to go back in the house. I couldn't stand it. The poor kid has to PRETEND that she has a daddy! How messed up is that!

She is such a wonderful little girl and right now she is my only link to sanity. She doesn't judge me for the decisions I make and she has that unconditional love for me that I need so much. That's the kind of love you had for me and I was so lucky. Thank you for helping me live something that many people never have the chance to experience.

A new year will begin next week without you. I still sometimes can't believe you're never coming home. June will be here before we know it and you will have been gone three whole years. God, how time flies.

Please look down on all of us with love and understanding as we go through some previously uncharted territory. It's not easy for any of us.

Love and hugs.

Denise

Denise Wise
Widow, Michael H. Wise, II EOW 6-5-04

December 26, 2006

Dear Denise and the family of Officer Wise,

My prayers are with you and your family as you endure through yet another Holiday without your Hero in Blue. May the coming New Year bring you hope and peace, and an abundance of health. Just know that you and your daughter are thought of often...Much love to both of you.

Bethlehem PD Wife

December 26, 2006

It all seems like yesterday yet and it is tough for everyone. You're wife, daughter, and parents are amazing people and have so many guardian angels around them. I miss you and I know my mom misses you. Merry Christmas my friend.

Judd Howdyshell
First Aid and Safety Patrol and friend

December 25, 2006

Hi Denise. I am still unable to find enough words to thank you for all you have done to help me. I just want to wish you a Merry Christmas and say thank you, but I know there is nothing Merry about it. It is 2:00 a.m. and here I sit. I just don't know how you do it! You are amazing!

Love,

Trish

Trish Wertz
Loving Widow of slain Officer Scott Wertz

December 25, 2006

Mike,
Over 5 years ago you served as a mentor for me begining my career in public service starting first with EMS. Now 5 years later, I'm finding myself a rookie again, this time in law enforcement and still using my reflections and memories of you as a guiding light for my future. I know even now your memory lives on and your guidance continues to guide me now, and in the future. You are still missed by many, and my prayers continue to go out to your family and friends.

Patrolman Kristopher M. Keller
Lower Swatara Twp. Police Dept., First Aid and Safety Patrol

December 23, 2006

Well, it's Christmas number three without you. We're all still trying to figure out what our holiday routine is and I, for one, am not doing a very good job. I've managed to ensure that this holiday will be worse than I expected and now I'm stuck. I'd love for our lives to be normal again. I hope JP is thinking about us while spending Christmas with his family and that AS is enjoying his time behind bars.

Matt and Mitch are old enough now that you'd really be enjoying the toys and games they get for Christmas. They might still be willing to share them with you like they used to when they still got trucks, cars and bulldozers for gifts. I got them marshmallow shooters last year and thought to myself that I would have gotten you and Bill ones of your own so that you could join in the battle.

The Wise family Christmas party is tonight and there will be no under-the-radar comedy routine concocted by you, Bill and Chris. We all miss those days. You guys were such a riot together. Don't get me wrong, Chris and Bill are still funny but I enjoyed watching you ham it up with them.

I'm missing Sierra terribly. It will be our first Christmas without her. I kept seeing doggie treat gift packs but had to walk right past them for the first time in 11 years. No squeaky stuffed toys for her to rip out the squeaker in 30 seconds. No crunching of pig ears, either.

And you are not here. No practical toiletry stocking stuffers or Hershey Spa gift certificate. No VS boxes. No big grin while watching Kendall open her girly gifts. I got her ice skates and roller blades and am trying to figure out who can teach her. It should be you. (I still have not mastered the art of stopping.)

And it is our last Christmas in the house that you and I built together. It will be very difficult to leave this house but I need to do it.

We love you and miss you.

Denise

Denise L. Wise
Wife, Michael H. Wise, II EOW 6-5-04

December 23, 2006

Dear Denise ~

I wanted to let you know that my thoughts and prayers are with you as you endure another holiday season without your wonderful husband. May you have a warm and blessed Christmas and may the New Year bring you hope, renewed faith and new beginnings.

Warmly ~
Carin E. Sollman
wife of Officer Jesse E. Sollman, EOW 3/25/05

December 23, 2006

Mike,
I've kept quite long enough. Finally, I am going to leave you a reflection. I am so sorry I didn't protect you. When we were in the shootout I remember feeling the shots coming into the back of the car. I did not see you... I thought you were out of the car so I kept shooting at """DIRT!!!"" I hate him!!!!!! I Hate him !!!!!!!!! They say God forgives and we should forgive.......that is easier said then done. Life has been very hard since you were taken from us. Hard to express in words how I feel. I guess anger is one of the words that can describe it. I think of your family everyday. I think of you everyday. Every time I put on the uniform, I think of you. When I'm driving around in the City especially car 3 I think of you. I guess what I am trying to say is I think of you alot.
The outcome of the trial was a spit to all our faces. I am sure God has his reasons. thank God the Judge saw that "Dirt" was just that, and gave him the maximun sentence he could. I must tell you that C.I.Cabrera, Brian, Craig, and Jason (ADA'S) worked so hard on the case. Those guys deserve all our blessings. They sacrificed alot for you and I.
Your family is so strong. They are great people. You were a lucky, MAN. I think the World of them.
There is so much I am holding inside. My last memory of you is one that tells who you were. I remember riding in the van and my son was on the phone. I put him on speaker, he asked "Dad, what are you doing?" You yelled out, "Catching the Bad guys, buddy!!" that was Cool. It was his Birhtday so everyone said "Happy Birthday", to him and I hung up. a Few hours later me and Lance were alone with several people about three blocks away form you. So what do you do? You jogged three blocks away to our location, so that you could give us a hand. Who else would have done that? I appreciated that so much, but I wish you wouldn't have, maybe you could be spending this Holiday with your bueatiful daughter, Kendall and family. God Bless them.

Mike I want everyone to know, You were a "HERO". You stood there, brave and even though we were under fire, you stood straight up, showed no fear and shot back at "Dirt" . I remember, saying to myself, Damn this guy is No Joke as I saw your actions. Your family and fellow brothers should be proud of you, as I am. Not many, would be able to do what You did.

Mike I am sure you know already, since I truly believe Brother Scott Wertz is in Heaven with you, another brother was taken from us. He was close to me in more ways then one. like I said this has affected me and my family so much.

I will continue to think of you and Scott everyday. Thank you for what you did. You will always be a part of me.

To your family..... """I love you guys!!!! """

Always in my heart

Izzy

ISRAEL GONZALEZ
READING P D

December 12, 2006

As your mom celebrated her 60th birthday this weekend there was a sadness to her demeanor. She had a rough day and wished you could be there with her. Matt, Julie and Lilly were there for part of the weekend, and Kendall and I spent the day with her to help make it easier and I think we did a good job of distracting her. The only thing that could truly have made her feel better would have been to have you there to hug her and wish her a happy birthday.

The holidays are still difficult for all of us. I must admit that when I see happy, intact families having a wonderful time I still get a pang of envy. Your mom and I took Kendall to see Disney Princesses on Ice and there were lots of daddys there. I wondered if you would have gone with us if you were still alive. I believe you would have (even though you probably would have been rolling your eyes the whole time.) But if Kendall wanted you there, you would have taken her. I know that. You would have made it lots of fun. But I know you wouldn't have bought her a $12 cup full of colored ice like Grandma did!

Last week, out of the blue, Kendall said, "I just wish I could hear daddy's voice." I guess that means I'll have to finally watch the family movies I've been avoiding. Thank God we do have recordings with you talking and having fun with her. (And making her crash when you turned too fast with her sled and she did a face-plant into the snow.) She will be able to look at the movies and smile and she will know that her daddy was a fun guy and treasured her.

And I know when you were alive you didn't want me to get a motorcycle so I was surprised at all the positive signs I was getting when I was looking at a bike--like BNL being on the video screen with the same song every time I walked into White's. Weird. But the few times I've been on the bike I've really enjoyed it and hope that you will watch over me when I'm out on the road. It's something I really wanted to do so I hope my loved ones will tolerate or even accept my new hobby. (It has not been very well received.)Kendall was happy for me. When I brought the bike home she said, "Mommy, I'm so happy for you." Of course, I hope she knows that there's no way I'll let her get a bike! My goal is to buy your Fatboy back from Rob and ride it in the Ride for Wise but that could take a few riding seasons.

Give Sierra a big hug for me. I miss her so much.

Miss you.

Denise

Denise L. Wise
surviving spouse

December 4, 2006

Mike,
As we are flung into another Christmas season, I am reminded of the family parties. Your antics always had me (and the rest of the family) laughing to tears. I can't help but smile when I think about your "Riverdance" and cry because we won't be seeing those routines until we meet in God's Kingdom. We miss you, love you, and keep you and your family in our prayers.

William M. Reigle
Uncle Bill

December 3, 2006

I asked Kendall today what she was thankful for. Among the things and people she named, she said, "My daddy." I said, "But he's not here anymore." She simply said, "I know, but I'm still thankful for him." Maybe there's some deeper meaning that is just impossible for me to grasp but I'm glad she's remembering you fondly.

Kendall had her Thanksgiving program at preschool this week and it was so cute. She was dressed as an indian and actually let me put braids in her hair for the occasion. I'm so proud of the person she's becoming. I'm sure you are proud, too. She's a wonderful little girl and we all just love and appreciate her so much.

As I'm typing this, Kendall is next to me. She says, "HI" and "I love you." Ugh, you should be here for her. When she comes in the room when I have this page open she just smiles and yells, "Daddy!"

I've been missing Sierra terribly lately. I still catch myself starting to say, "Sierra" when I walk in the door. I sometimes also want to say, "Bye Sierra, we'll be back soon" when we leave. It's still so weird here without her.

Kendall and I had a play date with Erica, Isabelle, Luke and Adam yesterday and it was so good to be around them. We've vowed to get together more often. Things will never be the same but I still need to be friends with them. I left your favorite flannel shirt and the mistletoe tie for Matt but he wasn't there so I couldn't see his expression. I'm sure he'll love both items because they come with fond memories.

Rob is slowly losing Harley. His first cancer treatment failed and now the vet says to just make him comfortable. Please be with Rob because I know it's going to be tough for him. I'm sure he'll take comfort in knowing that you will take care of Harley and Harley will have a great time annoying Sierra.

And please be with Trish, the boys and the rest of her family during the holidays. The holidays are not easy for us, either, because we miss you so much, but this is the first time they have to endure it. Remind Scott to keep sending them signs. And please keep sending your signs to me--they really do help.

Love you. Miss you.

Denise L. Wise

November 23, 2006

to denise: i am sorry i have never left a reflection for mike. i didn't know this even existed until scott was killed. denise, i want to thank you for being there for trish.when i asked you to help her, it was because of your strength. your an awesome person, and i can't thank you enough for what you have done for my family.

mike's parents: you know i always told you that you were awesome people. mike was lucky to have such wonderful parents like you. your a great family, and it is always a pleasure to be in your company. i will eat dirt with you guys anytime.

to julie: i have talked to you a few times, but never did i truly grasp the pain you were feeling, until i lost my brother. how do you do it? how do you make it through this?
my brother & i had an awesome relationship. we were close, especially growing up. i don't know what i am going to do without him. as his sister i feel like a part of me is gone.
i never met your brother, but the night he was killed, izzy called home to wish nicholas happy birthday. he had the phone on speaker & nicholas was asking if they were out catching the bad guys. the first person to answer was mike, and he said that's right buddy were going to catch the bad guys for you. i will never forget that night. your brother was laughing, as they all were. having a good time doing what they loved. i just wanted to say, that i think in all of the chaos, i realize people don't think of the brothers or sisters, or even parents right away when there is a tragedy like this. i now understand your pain, & i am sorry for your loss.

michele

michele
scott's sister

November 18, 2006

Denise, I come to Mike's website weekly and although I know all too well your pain, yours is much different. You have a precious little girl who is now left without a daddy. You are doing such a fabulous job raising her and you must be so proud of her. She is such a little angel. I wish that we lived closer so we could get together more often. It would be nice to have a sort of Spouses Retreat on this coast for a weekend somewhere. Maybe you and I could organize that with the widows we have each met. You are another widow that I wish I met under other circumstances. Please know I think about you often and hope that you are making it through the best you know how. Love, Denise

Denise Zimmerman
Wife of NJ State Trooper Bert Zimmerman EOW 2-5-04

October 29, 2006

Dear Denise......

I just got done writing a lengthy letter to Michael's mother. She had sent me a card asking how I was recovering and to see how I was doing. I told her in the letter that I have been meaning to write to you and her for a long time but everytime I start to I freeze. I know what I want to say but I just cant pull myself together to write.
You came to my ceremony last December when I received the purple heart in Lititz. I cant tell you how much it meant to me for you and your daughter to be there for me. I looked in your daughters eyes and knew that her father was looking over me the night I was shot and had a lot to do with me surviving. I returned to work back in June full duty after recovering for almost 8 months. The first day I went back to work was June 5, which is also my birthday and a very important day in your life as well. I have constant reminders of your husband surronding me. I had the pamphlet for Michael's service in my shirt pocket and his memorial pin on my uniform.
The past year has been an emotional roller coaster for me and at times I find myself feeling guilty for having survived. I feel guilty because your husband and Officer Wertz have children and wives and I do not. I sometimes wish I could trade places with either one of them so their children wouldnt have to grow up without their dad and the wives would be spared the grief of losing their partner. Majority of the time I am very positive and feel very fortunate to still be alive, but other times I think of Kendall and now Officer Wertz's boys and its a struggle. I am always thinking about you and Kendall as well as Michael's mother. You all are always in my thoughts and prayers.
I have found great comfort in talking to the widow of my Chief, Douglas Shertzer(EOW 5.11.04). Every time I'm on patrol and see her sitting outside I stop and we talk about things. I always feel better after I've talked to her. She is a very strong woman and really puts things in perspective for me.
As I move forward in life and everything slowly returns to normal I am constantly reminded of the sacrifice your husband made and please take comfort in knowing that not a day goes by that I dont think of him, you, and Kendall. I check this site every day I come into work knowing full well that I came very close to having my name and face on here. The reflections you leave for your husband just break my heart. I want so bad to tell you that everything will be ok and he'll be home soon. I want you and your daughter to stop hurting. Unfortunately I cant and everything just seems so senseless.
I gave my address and phone number to Michael's mother in the letter I sent her. I told her that I had so much more to talk to her about if she felt so inclined to call me. If you would like to contact me you can get everything from her. I would like very much to remain a part of your lives in someway and help in any way possible. Please remain strong and know that there are so many people out there that love and support you and your family and always will!!!

Officer Jevon M. Miller
Lititz Borough Police Department Lititz, PA

Officer Jevon M. Miller
Lititz Borough Police Department

October 24, 2006

Today I packed your FASP, police academy and Reading PD uniforms away in a storage box. I've already given and RPD uniform to Julie and your parents. I've been putting it off for such a long time but felt like it is time. It's so difficult to put your things away even though I know you're not coming home to use them. I keep telling myself that it's okay--you don't need them anymore. It's time to put them away. I can't stop crying.

Kendall asked me today if I want to die to be with you and Sierra. I told her that I was just glad that you and Sierra are together. She asked me again so I told her that I'd rather stay here with her. She said, "But we could both die so we can be with Daddy and Sierra again." God, that tore my heart out. The solution is so simple in her mind. She really doesn't understand why she can't be with her daddy and I'll never be able to explain it to her.

She ran in the Michael H. Wise Memorial Run last weekend and did such a good job. We were all very proud of her. She told me afterward that she ran for her daddy. Last evening at choir practice the instructor called attention to the sunset. Kendall told everyone there that her daddy made the sunset just for her. She's such a special little girl but I know you already know that.

We love you and miss you.

PS You will be happy to know that I am giving your purple flannel shirt to Matt Wentzel. I'm also giving him your mistletoe tie. When I told him, he was thrilled. Nobody would enjoy these two items more and I didn't want to pack them away. Rob has been coveting the orange sweatpants but I'm keeping them. He's already got the Harley, he doesn't need the sweatpants! They make me smile when I see them.

Denise Wise, widow, Michael H. Wise, II

October 13, 2006

Denise

I met you at the benefit tournament for Scott...I helped organize it. I am so sad that this is how we got to meet.
At least I was able to make both you and Trish laugh on such a sad day with the threat of beating up that lady reporter... haha

Anyway I just wanted to tell you how brave I think you are... most people wouldn't be able to live thru this a 2nd time. But you are there for Trish and the boys without any hesitation.
I as a friend of Scott's wanted to say THANK YOU for taking the time to care for them and to be there for them.
You know what she lives with every day to have lost her husband. But yet you are there for her when this must still be so raw for you.
I know that both Scott and MIke are hero's but quite honestly I think you and Trish are hero's as well. You both are living every persons worst nitghtmare but yet you both seem to get thru it.


God Bless you Denise for you a truely a remarkable person

Kelley Witman

friend of Scott Wertz

October 2, 2006