St. Johns County Sheriff's Office, Florida
End of Watch Sunday, May 2, 2004
Reflections for Deputy Sheriff Joshua Edwin Blyler
DEAR JOSH-IT IS SO HARD SOMETIMES TO WRITE TO YOU ON THIS PAGE. IT REMINDS ME YOU ARE NOT HERE. I WANT TO TALK TO YOU FACE TO FACE, HUG YOU AND HOLD. MRS CLAUDIA WILL BE JOINING YOU SOON, HER CANCER CAME BACK STRONG & FIGHTING MAD.
I ASKED THE LORD TO LET HER LIVE THROUGH CHRISTMAS SO HER HUSBAND WOULD NOT REMEMBER CHRISTMAS AS LOSING SOMEONE HE LOVES. CHRISTMAS IS ABOUT THE BIRTH OF THE SAVIOR THAT YOU NOW ABIDE WITH. I AM SO THANKFUL THAT YOU CHOSE THAT ROAD MY DEAR SON. THIS GRIEF WOULD BE AWFUL THINKING YOU WERE LIVING ETERNITY IN HELL. SOME DAYS IT FEELS THAT WAY HERE WITH YOU GONE,HELL.
DADDY & I LOVE YOU & WE ARE LOOKING FORWARD TO SEEING THAT WONDERFUL SMILE.
I STILL RUN INTO PEOPLE WHO TELL ME HOW WONDERFUL YOUR SPIRIT & SMILE WAS TO THEM. " MERRY CHRISTMAS " LOVE MOM
JEAN BLYLER
MOM
December 25, 2005
Merry Christmas Joshua and to your loved ones. Wrap your wings around them and try and ease some of their pain. I'm sure you were the topic of discussion at Christmas Dinner, it's the way your loved ones will remember you and honor you. Talking about the past and all the great stories and memories that will come out. You have not, nor will you ever, be forgotten.
Bob Gordon, father of fallen officer
Michael P. Gordon, EOW: 8/8/04
Bob Gordon
December 25, 2005
WHEN I GET WHERE I'M GOING-BRAD PAISLEY
When I get where I'm going
On the far side of the sky
The first thing that I'm gonna do
Is spread my wings and fly
I'm gonna land beside a lion
And run my fingers through his mane
Or I might find out what it's like
To ride a drop of rain
(Chorus:)
Yeah when I get where I'm going
There'll be only happy tears
I will shed the sins and struggles
I have carried all these years
And I'll leave my heart wide open
I will love and have no fear
Yeah when I get where I'm going
Don't cry for me down here
I'm gonna walk with my grand daddy
And he'll match me step for step
And I'll tell him how I missed him
Every minute since he left
Then I'll hug his neck
(Chorus)
So much pain and so much darkness
In this world we stumble through
All these questions I can't answer
So much work to do
But when I get where I'm going
And I see my maker's face
I'll stand forever in the light
Of his amazing grace
Yeah when I get where I'm going
There'll be only happy tears
Hallelujah
I will love and have no fear
When I get where I'm going
Yeah when I get where I'm going
Merry Christmas, Josh & Kelly
December 24, 2005
MERRY CHRISTMAS BUDDY
MITCHEL APRIL AND TIFF
APRIL BLYLER-sister inlaw
December 24, 2005
Dear Josh,
Once again I look at your sweet face and know everyone is missing you so much. It's so hard to keep going. We just pray for the day we are all back together.
Kelly, thank you for your sweet words and thoughtfulness in remembering Matt and us. I hope we get to meet you in Washington someday.
Love,
Matt's Mom
Linda Rittenhouse
December 24, 2005
D.S. Blyler..just wanted to say MERRY CHRISTMAS & HAPPY NEW YEAR! hope you have a good time with the other fallen heros celebrating our Lord's birth..
also wanted to say..please help your family get through another holiday season without you..i can't say that i know what they are going through..but i'm sure the holiday's are the hardest..so please be with them & help them through the tough times..REST IN PEACE & WITH EASE BLUE ANGEL!!
kelly..just wanted to let you know that i'm thinking of you & josh & both of your families especially during the holidays..stay strong..josh is proud of you & always will be!!
girlfriend of a dpd
detroit, mi
December 23, 2005
Josh,
Send your love and your the feeling of your beautiful smile to comfort your family and Kelly this coming christmas. It is such a difficult time for everyone who loves you.
Kelly,
I love talking to you, you are so beautiful. I know Josh will be proud of how you have handled everything. I know Josh and Scott are together along with all the other guys preparing for the birth of our Lord.
Thank you for letting me get to know Josh. I wish I could have known him before all of this, he is a beautiful man.
Josh's Family,
May Josh and God send you lots of Love this coming Christmas and everyday.
Much Love,
Many Hugs,
Monica
Fiancee Scott Stewart EOW 8-11-02 Detroit
December 19, 2005
The Blyler Family,
My thoughts and prayers are with you during this difficult time. The Holidays are one of the hardest times to be without your loved one. Josh made the ultimate sacrifice doing a job that he loved. Take comfort in knowing that he is watching down on all of you and sending you his love from above.
Kelly,
My thoughts and prayers are also with you during this difficult time. Hold your memories of Josh close and know that he is with you always. Thank you so much for all of your support in the past few months. I wish we would have met under different circumstances but I am truly grateful for your friendship. I see why Josh called you his perfect angel. Sending you lots of hugs.
God Bless You,
Shannon
Shannon Raya
S/O of PO Patrick Righi-Barnard EOW 11-25-04
December 14, 2005
Kelly,
Thanks so much for leaving a reflection on Terry's memorial page. I am so sorry about Joshua. As the days go on I learn of more and more young heroes who were taken entirely too soon. I really do not understand why so many incredible people have to leave from this earth right before getting married and starting their families. It just seems so unfair. I guess we will all find out the reasons one day, but that does not give us much comfort now. I will keep you and Joshua's family in my thoughts and prayers as well.
Joshua, thanks so much for your sacrifice. You are a hero and you will not be forgotten. Please continue to let Kelly feel your presence.
Take care,
Lynn Harwell
Fiancee'of Det.Terry Melancon
E.O.W. 8-10-05
December 13, 2005
Dear Josh,
Just wanted to say that I love you and miss you. I was able to visit with Jeff and Joann this weekend. We had a lot of good laughs, as usual. We talked about your's and Jeff's carpet days. You two were quite the pair! I wish you were with us again...I wish for it every day.
Christine's wedding was beautiful. I wish that you could've been there with me in person. Jason sang, "Shine On Us", the song we had chosen for the unity candle in our wedding. I fought back the tears as I stood there near Christine. It really was one of the most beautiful weddings I have been to. I was so happy for her. I know you would've been too.
I miss you every minute of every day. I love you.
Always and forever,
Kelly
Kelly Gillain
Josh's One & Only
December 13, 2005
Kelly, Peter Grignon was killed on March 23rd this year in Louisville. He was not my fiance, not my boyfriend, but a friend. I've ached and cried so much for him and his wife... I can only imagine what you've gone through since Josh's tragic death. My fiancee, too, is a police officer. He's been doing this for nearly 8 years. Everytime he puts on his uniform, I remember women just like you and the men you loved. I know that it truly is a possibility, as much as any of us want to push it out of our minds. I see Josh's smile in that picture and I can imagine the way he smiled at you and the laughter you shared. When I read about the Charlie Brown Christmas tree, I immediately thought of my fiance. He has the same kind of tree... I always make fun of him for it. Every laugh he gives me, every moment... I cherish even more than before b/c women like you no longer experience such things. I'm sorry the man you love had to be taken from you and his family and friends. I hope that you can take some slight comfort in knowing he was doing what he loved. Any woman who dates or marries a police officer knows the love they have for their job. Even though he is up in Heaven working for God now, it doesn't make it easier to hear people tell you "he's in a better place". I bet Christmas is huge up there though, you think? God bless you and be with you during the holidays and beyond. I know Josh is up there with Pete watching over all of us and holding our hands a little tighter through the Christmas season.
LEO fiancee and friend of Peter Grignon EOW 3/23/05
LEO fiancee
LMPD, Kentucky
December 7, 2005
DEAR JOSH MY 2ND THANKSGIVING WITHOUT YOU, MY BABY. I AM SO FORTUNATE TO HAVE WONDERFUL FAMILY & FRIENDS. MITCHELL SPENT 4 DAYS WITH US. IT WAS A VERY THOUGHTFUL AND WONDERFUL GIFT. WORDS CANNOT DESCRIBE OUR GRIEF AS WE REALIZE EVERY DAY YOU ARE GONE FROM US.
I LOVE YOU! MOM
JEAN BLYLER
MOM
November 27, 2005
My dearest Josh,
It's hard to believe that I have experienced another Thanksgiving without you. This year, we did the usual get together, which is always nice. We read off the scripture verses inside the walnuts that Gramma makes every year, ate lots of food, and played our annual traditional game of "Up Words". Last year and this year, I could still see you in the circle, reading off your scripture verse, holding my hand as we blessed the food, laughing with everyone, and playing a challenging game of "Up Words" (I can vividly see the look on your face when you'd win...a smile stretched from ear to ear). Every day, I still can't believe that you're gone.
I reflected back on all the Thanksgiving's we spent together. They were always so much fun. Saad would usually come over to my house and spend Thanksgiving night with us. The two of you were always so funny together. I always enjoyecd those times. Today and every day, I will be thankful for each moment God allowed us to share together, while you lived on this earth.
I put up two trees this year, as well as other Christmas decorations. All the while I decorated, listening to my Christmas c.d.'s, I remembered our last Christmas season together. I remember surprising you at the duty station, mid December 2004, for quick hugs and kisses. Then, going back to your apartment to put up the little tree that I bought you. When you came home from your shift that evening, and walked in the door, you gave the cutest laugh of surprise. We called it your's and Adam's "Charlie Brown" christmas tree. We had such a great time that night. I'll never forget it...not ever. You always had a way of surprising me as well....just before Christmas, we were driving in your cop car at night, going to get something to eat (of course :0) ). As we were driving over the bridge of lions, you told me to close my eyes for a minute. When you told me to open them, I saw the beautiful lights from the "Nites of Lights" in St. Augustine. It was so beautiful. When I looked over at you, you simply said, "I knew you'd love it". As we walked throughout ol' town, I felt like we were the only two people in the world. Sipping hot chocolate and holding your hand....it was like the front of a Christmas card...picture perfect. It was an amazing Christmas. This year, when I walk through ol' town, I know you will be with me in spirit, as you are always. Your love is always with me.
My memories of you will never fade. Each day, it seems like I'm reminded of another wonderful memory we shared. You're all around me, everywhere I go. My heart still breaks every day from the reality of your death. But, our hope in Christ to be together again makes the pain bearable. The holidays will undoubtably be difficult this year. Things will never be the same without you. But, I know you're with me always in my heart...a promised kept by you always. You're friends are doing great and miss you every day. I love you and miss you always.
Forever in my heart,
Kelly
Kelly Gillain
Josh's One & Only Love
November 27, 2005
It has been several years since Deputy Blyer passed away. I have since moved on from the St Johns County Sheriffs Office to work for Putnam County Sheriffs Office. Even though i have left St. Johns, Josh will always remain with me as a partner. We started Law Enforcement together and together you will remain in my memories. Best of luck to your parents and may god bless.
Deputy Sheriff Chris Mackley
Putnam County Sheriffs Office
November 22, 2005
DEAR JOSH HERE IT IS SUNDAY ONCE AGAIN. DAD WAS UP AT 3:00 THIS MORNING MISSING YOU. I TRY TO BE POSITIVE CONCERNING GETTING TOGETHER FOR THE HOLIDAYS BUT SOMEHOW MY MIND ALWAYS GOES TO THE FACT THAT YOU ARE NOT HERE.
THANK YOU BOB FOR PUTTING UP A BLUE LIGHT FOR JOSH. I HAVE THEM INSIDE BUT I JUST HAVE NO DESIRE TO DECORATE FOR CHRISTMAS THIS YEAR. THANK YOU BABY FOR ALL YOUR SMILES, HUGS, AND BEING THE WONDERFUL PERSON YOU ARE. LOVE MOM
JEAN BLYLER
MOM
November 20, 2005
Josh,
I just finished decorating the outside of my home with Blue Lights for the Holiday season. One of those Blue lights is for you so that you are remembered over the holidays here at my home. You were called away at such a young age and just beginning your career. I know people will say, just what kind of police officer you would have become, my answer to that is you already were a great police officer. I know your loved ones now have a life full of yesterdays and tomorrows are very hard to realize but we all have to go on and face one day at a time and the reason is that we will all keep your name and memory alive.
Bob Gordon, father of fallen officer Michael P. Gordon, EOW: 8/8/04
Bob Gordon
November 18, 2005
My dearest Josh,
Missing you more than words can say...wishing you were here, always. I love you.
All my love,
Kelly
Kelly Gillain
Josh's One & Only
November 9, 2005
It has been over 18 months since you were called away and the grief is still here for those left behind. I know they have asked the question, "Why," over and over and the "If's" over and over and can not find an answer to either. I'm sure being a police officer was a life long dream of Joshua and we can't keep them from their dreams. He got to live his dream, even for a little while. He is a true hero and will never be forgotten.
Bob Gordon, father of fallen officer Michael P. Gordon, EOW: 8/8/04
Bob Gordon
November 9, 2005
DEAR JOSH - WE CELEBRATED MANY BIRTHDAYS THIS WEEKEND, INCLUDING MITCHELL. IT IS AMAZING TO ME HOW WE LOOK AT THINGS IN LIFE AFTER LOSING SOMEONE SO PRECIOUS & YOUNG. BIRTHDAYS ARE A CELEBRATION OF LIFE!FOR THOSE THAT ARE ALLOWED TO BE WITH US. I MISS YOU, EVERYDAY. THE HOLIDAYS ARE ALWAYS TOUGH. I WENT SHOPPING RECENTLY AND WALKED IN THE DOOR OF THE STORE AND HERE WAS ALL THIS CHRISTMAS DECO EVERYWHERE. FOR ME, IT WAS AWFUL, BUT I LOOK FORWARD TO HEARING FROM YOU -ABOUT YOUR CHRISTMAS IN HEAVEN. I LOVE YOU! MOM
JEAN BLYLER
MOM
November 8, 2005
HEY JOSH YOU HAVE PROBALY MET DEPUTY CHRIS DALE BY NOW. HE WAS BURIED MONDAY. HE WILL SHARE WITH YOU THAT HE GOT SAVED JUST 3 WEEKS BEFORE HE DIED.
HIS PARENTS TOLD US IT MUST BE HARD NOT TO BE ABLE TO SAY GOOD BYE. THEY WERE ABLE TO DO THAT, SAY GOODBYE. I LOVE YOU! LOVE MOM
JEAN BLYLER
MOM
October 26, 2005
Josh was a very good friend and partner. I went through the academy and the field training program in st johns with him. He will always remain with me as a partner. Best of luck and grace to his parents and family and God Bless Josh. Thanks for your service to this nation and community of st johns county.
Deputy Sheriff Chris Mackley
Putnam County Sheriffs Office
October 19, 2005
Dear Josh,
Another day has passed....another day without you, but one more day closer to you. Every part of me longs to be with you. I pulled out some more home videos of us and watched them today. I laughed so hard as I watched the youth camp 2001 video of us. We were laughing hysterically about the horrible spaghetti they served for dinner the night before. We kept cracking jokes that, apparently, only we got. Everyone else was looking at us like we were a couple of crazies. I miss those laughs. You were so "HI-larious", as we would always say. I miss goofing off with you and being the only two people in the world who understood each other completely. I watched another video of us at your apartment, shortly before you passed. You were cozy and comfortable on my gramma's old quail couch (you were so proud of that 70's couch!) in your white t-shirt and jeans. I was filming and giving commentary on "Josh's and Adam's Apratment". You kept laughing, saying, "Turn that thing off and come over here". As usual, you were gorgeous...so very cute! As I watched these videos, I kept thinking about how lucky I am to have been loved by you so deeply. You could've loved anyone, but you chose me. I could never describe in words the depth of our love....I could only experience it....and it was the most amazing experience.
Every day, the pain of your death burns holes in my heart. I want more than anything in this world to be in your arms again, see your face, hold your hands, hear your voice....I want more than anything to be with you again. Every morning I wake up, hoping that this all was a horrible nightmare and any minute I will see your face at my front door. The reality of knowing that will not happen is so painful. It grieves my heart.
I'm one more day closer to you, Josh. I can't wait for you to turn around and see me in heaven one day. I can't wait to see your face again and praise our Lord together in heaven, as we did on earth. I know you are with me....always and forever.
All my love,
Kelly
"Your Perfect Angel"
Kelly Gillain
Josh's One & Only Love
October 6, 2005
Deputy Sheriff Blyler..you - your family - friends & co-workers are in my thoughts & prayers..please continue to watch over them & your fellow brothers/sisters in blue..YOU WILL NEVER BE FORGOTTEN..REST IN PEACE & WITH EASE BLUE ANGEL!!!!
Kelly..i come to this website often & read the reflections of the various officers that their family - friends & loved ones leave..i'm not going to say i know what you are going through & that i know how you feel..because i don't..but when our loved ones put on these uniforms & badges..they doing so because it is something that they love..when they leave for work..we don't know if this will be the last time that we kiss/hug them good-bye..we only hope & pray that they will come back to us safe & sound..after reading your reflections for josh..i know that he will never be forgotten & that you will always keep on loving him..you WILL be reunited with him one day..i'm sure not soon enough for you..but in do time..you two will be together for ever, just keep on telling/showing him that you love & think about him often..remember, he died doing something that he truly loved..josh will always love you....take super care..
karen..girlfriend of a leo
roseville, mi
October 6, 2005
Dear Josh and Family,
I check my son's reflections every day and then I go to another officer to read about, cry about and wonder how in the world we are supposed to live without these beautiful, precious, sons and daughters. I am looking at Joshua's face and shaking my head at what this world hands us. Heaven has to be even more wonderful than we have been told all our lives; I feel like my heart has already left this earth, I am just bound here by my body that can make no sense of anything anymore.
Kelly, thank you for writing on Matthew's page with your sweet words and at such a hard time for us. As if one day could possibly be worse than the last or the next. It directed us to Josh's page and gave us the opportunity to read of another family's great love for each other.
God bless all of you, give you comfort and peace at those times we cry the hardest, and know that we all will be united and our hearts and souls will be whole again.
Love,
Linda Rittenhouse, Matt's Mom
Jesse Matthew Rittenhouse
e.o.w 9/16/04
October 3, 2005
Josh,
I love you and miss you so much. I heard our song, "When You Say Nothing At All", on the radio today. My eyes filled with tears, yet my heart brought to mind several cherished memories of us that made me smile. When the song finished, I put in my cd of the song and let it repeat over and over again. I can't explain it, but I felt you with me. You promised me when you were hired at SJSO that no matter what happened, you would always be with me....and you still are with me. Because we loved each other, we became a part of each other. You will forever be in my heart, Josh.
All my love,
Kelly
Kelly Gillain
Josh's Love
September 20, 2005
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