Family, Friends & Fellow Officers Remember...

Jeff, Happy Birthday Brother. We miss you but we know that you are still with us! We are planning your memorial...a celebration of your life - even though it saddens us to do this. Sheriff Medford has found someone to make a 2 foot wooden star that is exactly like our badge....it even has Sergeant Hewitt across the top. We are going to plant some flowers and place the star at your memorial in front of the dept. It helps to have something there even though we need no reminders. We still hear your laughter and see your smile. We know you are there with us and I'm sure you will be there with us, once again, as we go to Washington to honor and remember you. Give an extra hug to your family, they went to the cemetary yesterday to be with you I'm sure you knew they were there. I hope your birthday cake is as big as you want it to be, is your favorite flavor and has a BIG E2 on it.

BCSD Honor Guard
Buncombe County Sheriff's Department

March 20, 2006

Happy Birthday Jeff
We love and miss you

BCSD

March 20, 2006

Hey Jeff, Just wanted to wish you a Happy Birthday! We will never forget. Love & Miss you

BCSD

March 20, 2006

Hi honey,
Dad, Susan and I went to the cemetary today to celebrate your birthday which is actually tomorrow the 20th! In my earlier reflection I said it was only an hour before you were born 36 years ago. How about 25 hrs? We left a happy birthday balloon,, beautiful bouquets of Jonquils,Peach colored Tulips and Lavender spring flowers. We put a new picture of you on the stone, along with a very special card we found in a little antique shop in Black Mountain. The card is so special because it tells us where your name originated (France) and what it means. Your name means "Heavenly Peace". The definition: agreeable and understanding; affable and generous; a valiant servant to others; always has a twinkle in his eye; one never knows what he will do next. Add loving and kind to the list and it perfectly describes you, our son. Tomorrow will be filled with so much pain and heart ache as we begin another year without you.Let us feel your presence surround us honey, watch over us and know you are always loved.
Love,
Mom, Dad, Susan, Tammy and Family

March 19, 2006

Happy Birthday Jeff,

I know this will be a really rough day for your family, most special days and holidays are and always will be that way. Wanted to let you know that you have not been forgotten nor will you ever be. Keep looking down on your loved ones. Happy Birthday.

Bob Gordon, father of fallen Chicago Officer Michael P. Gordon, EOW: 8/8/04

Bob Gordon

March 19, 2006

Good morning son,
Today is your birthday and we hope you have a wonderful celebration in Heaven as you patrol the streets with all your brothers and sisters that have joined you there. Within the hour you will officially be 36 and in our hearts and mind you will always be young. We'll be with you today at the cemetary , to keep you company and to honor you. We miss you and love you so much honey. We're bringing you a touch of Spring and all of our love. Walk those streets of Gold for us and remember to keep a place close by your side for all of us because , someday I know in my heart, we'll be together again. Susan sends her love. Her computer is still down but when we meet today she'll give me her reflection and I'll place it for her. She struggles everyday withyour lass. So many times we have all picked up the phone to call you and ralized you would not answer. Watch over us and care for us because we still have so many hardships to face here on earth and we need you and GOD on our side.
Again, Happy Birthday son.
Love always and forever,
Mom, Dad and family

March 19, 2006

Hello Sgt. Hewitt,

I have had the honor to meet Carolyn at the office and have spoken to her there a few times. The last time she was there I had the honor to meet Tracie. These ladies are the best examples I have seen to date of strength and courage. Carolyn's compassion touches everyone she meets. She speaks of you often and loves you very much. As my sister begins her career with Winston-Salem it is wonderful to know that there are people who still pray for those they do not personally know, simply because it is needed. Carolyn has accepted this as her calling. I just wanted you to know that the people you loved are in the buisness of loving other people, whether they know them personally or not. God bless.

S/O Adam J. Trent
Security Consultants Group

March 19, 2006

Jeff,
Once again we have lost a friend at BCDF. We are passing around cards for everyone to sign and wishing the family well - It feels like we just went through this... give Joe Ray our love. You both are missed. Lots of love to you.

Amanda

March 16, 2006

Tracie,
I haven't talked to you in a long time but wanted to let you know that you continue to be in my thoughts and prayers. It sounds like you are going through what I explained to you awhile back....realizing that you haven't been able to keep up with everyday chores and now trying to get caught up doing them. It will continue to be up & down...one day feeling like you are getting close to normal and the next right back to the way you've felt since April 2004. Hang in there and I'll try to talk to you soon!

Denise
Survivor of Calvin Taylor

March 16, 2006

Hey Baby,
I was just cleaning up in the office and wanted to take a minute to let you know I am thinking of you. Funny, some things are still in their place just as you left them. I opened the cabinet and there was a can of skoal that you had been working on. As disgusting as it is....there is also your spit bottle. It is sealed tight, but I just can't bring myself to throw it out. Perhaps in time. There is still a roll of spearmint certs and the change that was in your pocket. I guess it's crazy, but those little things that you were carrying are so valuable to me. As I was cleaning, I began going back through the newspapers, cards and other items I have. I read all the words, but it still seems that they are for someone else. My heart still doesn't want to accept reality. I changed so much when you left. Nothing was a priority anymore. The house has been a total disaster since you left. I just couldn't seem to find a reason to do anything around here. I know the neighbor's were going insane...even the outside has been a mess. I guess I'm coming around a little. I got the outside cleaned up some. Gotta get ready to mow before long. I'm getting there little by little. Spring is in the air so that helps. Rick Cummings and I are planning a memorial service for April 4th to honor you. Some of the same groups will be there again this year. I hope some of the department will be able to attend. I haven't had a chance to visit with them lately...so it will be nice to see all of the familiar faces. Jeff, you really would be so proud. I still can't believe all of the cards and letters that I received when you were taken from us. It was amazing how much people cared and how many lives you touched. I guess coming to this website will be a past time for me for the rest of my life. I love coming here to read the new reflections. I hate seeing the new names that appear, but its a comfort to know people haven't forgotten. I know that not everyone is able to write often, but there isn't a doubt that you are always in their hearts and minds. Jeff, I miss everything about you. I miss your smile, your laughter. I miss telling you to go brush your teeth before I would let you kiss me because you had just had a dip. Lord knows, I would let you kiss me now "dip" or "no dip". Ha Ha I would give anything for one more hug, one more fight so we could make up. Just one more "anything", anything at all. One more day, one more hour, or one more second. One more "Hey Beautiful" or one more "what are we having for dinner" when we had just finished eating breakfast. Our last conversation still echoes through my mind when you said you would be home as soon as you could to kiss me good night. I had no idea you would be so long. I guess I'll just wait until the day we meet again and I will get that kiss. Then I'm gonna fuss at you one more time for going to work that night. Ha Ha Baby, I could go on and on forever...so many things on my heart that I want to say to you. Stuff that's just between me and you...but I guess I'll save that for when I see you in my dreams.

I love you!
Tracie

See you in a munute 1-4-3

Only 10 more days til your Birthday....well, really 9...it's after midnight.

Tracie Hewitt
Jeff's Wife

March 10, 2006

To Jeff and all his loved ones:

I saw this on another site and wanted to post it for Jeff and all our other heroes.


Jeff, you rescued us, saved our possessions, our lives and our families. You are one of the rare heroes among us. You were always there for us in the most traumatic moments of our lives. No matter when we called, we just expected that you would come and do whatever it took to help us, and you always met our expectations. Your selflessness and dedication are awe-inspiring.

This world, this country, your community truly are better places because of you. To have lost you is a great tragedy, an irreplaceable, immeasurable loss for society. We are grateful for and to you, and honor you for all you did for us day in and day out whether you received a word of thanks or praise.

Rest in Peace, Jeff. Your memory is honored and revered today and everyday.


Phyllis Loya, mother of fallen officer Larry Lasater, Pittsburg PD, eow 4/24/05

March 7, 2006

Hi Jeff,

I don't know if I left this poem on your reflection page or not, but I think it will express the feelings of all those that love and miss you so much. I will leave it now for all to read as we miss Mike as much as your loved ones miss you.

We Do Not Need A Special Day

I do not need a special day
To bring you to my mind.
The days I do not think of you
Are very hard to find.

Each morning when I awake
I know that you are gone.
And no one knows the heartache
As I try to carry on.

My heart still aches with sadness
And secret tears still flow.
What it meant to lose you
No one will ever know.

My thoughs are always with you,
Your place no one can fill.
In life I loved you dearly,
In death I love you still.

There will always be a heartache,
And often a silent tear,
But always a precious memory
Of the days when you were here.

If tears could make a staircase,
And heartaches make a lane,
I'd walk the path to Heaven
And bring you home again.

I hold you close within my heart,
And there you will remain,
To walk with me throughout life
Until we meet again.

(Author Unknown)

Bob Gordon, father of fallen Officer Michael P. Gordon, EOW: 8/8/04

Bob Gordon

March 5, 2006

Hi Jeff,

Been working on my computer most of the day with a new fight I'm conducting for the 9 Officers Killed in the Line of Duty on the main ODMP page, the officers murdered by memebers from the Black Panthers back in the 60's & 70's. An alderwoman in the City of Chicago wants to have an honorary street named after Fred Hampton, the leader of the Chicago chapter of the Black Panthers who was killed in a joint police raid in 1969. Some aldermen and women are trying to turn this into a race issue but they just don't get it. How can they honor an individual who was an advocate of violence and whose organization was involved in the murders of 9 police officers and the wounding of countless others. They keep saying how he helped feed children and set up medical clinics for the poor. They don't mention how they would distribute coloring books to children depicting police officers being shot and killed. Great way to influence kids. I have been busy contacting Chicago Aldermen, the Chicago News papers in an effort to block this proposal which goes up for a vote at the end of this month. I will keep fighting and I have others helping me and hopefully this will not occur. You and Mike and the 17,000 other police officers on this site are the true heroes and role models for children to follow. I hope you and Mike keep looking down and help me with this fight. Well, time to get off this computer. Take care, keep looking down on your family and those still out on patrol in Buncombe County. Hopefully, I will make it down to NC later this month to meet your mother in law for the first time and Tracy and Taylor. Maybe even drop in at your department if they'll let a yankee in who doesn't really care for grits. Always reminded me of eating sand. Guess you have to be brought up liking them. Keep watch over your Mom and Dad. I know the feeling they wake with every day and one which we will have to deal with for the rest of our lives. Sometimes I don't know which is worse in losing a child. Losing one when they are young or having them with us until they are in their 30's and then have them taken away. Only advantage is we have more memories that we will forever cherish. Take care.

Bob Gordon, father of Chicago Officer Michael P. Gordon, EOW: 8/8/04

Bob Gordon

March 2, 2006

Hey Jeff,(again),
This is my second letter today, but it feels kinda good to "talk" to you. Hey, in case you didn't know, I still wear my "In memory of" bracelet! I never take it off. Ok, well today I did so I could take a test. It kept hitting the desk and annoying everyone so I had to take it off. Oh well. Ya know what's really wierd? I eat seafood now! Not just shrimp! I eat crab legs too! I wish I had liked them earlier when you and Mom would have those seafood dinners. I would always hear you two in there laughimg and having a really good time. While I was sitting in the living room watching TV and eating shrimp... But it wasn't yours or Moms' fault. It was mine. This years "American Idol" has been hilarious! You wold have loved it!! There was a cop who sang "Who Shot The Sherriff?"!!!! He will probably never be able to pull anyone over again. They would recognize him from "American Idol". Well, I think I'm gonna' head on to bed so Good Nite!


I love You!!!,
Taylor

Taylor Youngblood
step-son

February 24, 2006

Hey Jeff,
I miss youn so much. Things have been hard with out you here. But guess what, I'm going to Washington witha study tour for school. BUt I guess Mom already told you. I hope I get a chance to show everyone where your name is on the Memorial Wall. I'm so proud of you.
Me and Mom where talkin' about you yesterday! I was saying how it still feels like your coming home. It's hard to believe that it has been 2 years already. Every time Mom opens the garage door, I think it's you. That's the first thing that pops into my head. BUt you never walk through the door. I already said this, but, I am so proud of you!!!!
Love always, Your step-son,
Taylor

p.s. I will always think of you!!

Taylor Youngblood
step-son

February 24, 2006

Hi honey,
I'm sorry it's been awhile since I've been in touch but you are always in our hearts and on our minds.We visit your site each day and read each reflection written there. I've started so many reflections but the tears just wouldn't stop and I've had to cancel out. I keep waiting for the pain to ease up but each thought of you just brings another flood of tears. We've chosen the brightest star in all the heavens and re named it "Jeff". Each morning, just before dawn as dad and I leave for work we always look toward heaven, say a prayer, send up our love and wish you a good morning. Most mornings "your Star" is the only one in the sky, sometimes just to the left or just to the right but most often directly in front of us, to guide us as we begin yet another day without you. Soon(March 20th) your birthday will be here. Once again we will spend the day without you, honoring you and grieving for you. Susan sends her love. Her computer is down but she'll write as soon as she can. Watch over her. She really needs you beside her right now. A Blue Light still burns brightly on our front porch, a beacon for you and all your fallen brothers and sisters as well as those still standing watch. We love you honey. See you in the morning just before dawn!
Love,
Mom and Dad

February 19, 2006

Tracie,
The song " If you came back from Heaven" is sung by Lorrie Morgan. I hope you realize Tracie and the family of Jeff, that even though Jeff is gone, he will never be forgotten. The tragedy of that day was not out of vain, but was God's will. No one or anything could have changed that day. I could only imagine how hard it is, but please know the Lord is not going to burden you, without also healing at the same time. I only hope you know Tracie, so many people think of Jeff and reflect upon that day, and I myself was working that horrific night when I heard the call go out, and it is a night that lingers in so many men and women's lives, that will haunt us for a long time. We not only lost a fallen brother, but you lost your soulmate. With that said, stay strong, and remember, we will rejoice in Heaven with our loved ones someday, and live eternally in a world without fear, hatred, and sorrow. Tracie, take one day at a time and God will bless the unfortunate ones that suffer. May God bless you and Jeff's family and friends, and may we all get to laugh and love often, and embrace today and the future in which God holds.

Anonymous
Asheville Police Dept.

February 18, 2006

Hi Jeff,

Was thinking about you and Mike all day, but then again that seems to every day. Chicago buried another officer yesterday, Mike is no longer the last CPD officer Killed on the Job. I knew it would eventually happen but you hold out hope that another officer will not be killed. As long as there are men like you and Mike that put their lives on the line because you want to be out there working, there will be more funerals. My wife and I attended the wake of this fallen officer to pay our respects. We knew exactly how this officers mother felt, the pain, anguish, frustration. There were no magic words we could offer her as comfort except that she is not alone and we know how she feels. Hope you and Mike greet this new arrival and show him the ropes. Keep watching over your family and protect them from harm. You have not been forgotten and you never will.

Bob Gordon, father of fallen officer Michael P. Gordon, EOW: 8/8/04
www.michaelpgordon.com

Bob Gordon

February 17, 2006

Hey Sweetheart!
I know I'm late wishing you a Happy Valentine's Day, but you know I thought about you all day. I was going through a little "storm of life" the past few days. I was so upset about it, but I felt your presence and knew everything would be alright. I was thinking about the situation and started to get really angry, but then I stopped and thought about everything you did to make this particular "situation" better. I refuse to let your efforts be in vain. I will do my best to continue as you would have directed me to. I am human...so sometimes it is difficult, but hopefully God will give me strength. I also know that you are always there watching over me and surrounding me with your love. I can never thank you enough! I love you so much. You will always be "My Valentine".

See you in a minute 1-4-3
I love you,
Tracie

Tracie Hewitt
Jeff's Wife

February 16, 2006

As time passes people seem to forget, i will never forget, i have a picture in my office of you and the words "God bless you" when citizens come in and ask i tell them, i tell them the story as best i know it and tell them how to reach this web site. Tracie i only meet you once but i wish i could say something to make it better, just know you are in my thoughts and the thoughts of many people at the Henderson Co. Sheriff's Office.

Cpl Gary Mintz, Director Traffic Enf.
Henderson County Sheriff's Office, North Carolina

February 15, 2006

Hi Jeff,
Another year has started, and I wanted to let you know that even though some time has passed, you still run through my mind on a daily basis. I was in class today, and we were talking about how much police officers give, how much of their own lives they give to protect others, and how it is taken for granted. I older than a majority of the students in those classes. They want to be police officers, but I don't think they realize just what it means to be a police officer. I feel it's important to tell them about you, about that night, and make them realize it's a career decision that should never be taken lightly. You are such an inspiration every day, Jeff, and I hope you know that. I hope you know that I try to put a piece of you in the heart of every one of these officers-to-be.

Tracie - please know you are also in my thoughts every day. I wish I could ease the pain for you. I know as time passes, it seems people move on and forget, but I haven't.

Anonymous

February 13, 2006

Hey there, Honey! I know it's been a while since I left a note for you. Christmas and New Years were so difficult this year. It was bad last year too, but I guess things had been so busy it was somehow easier. There were so many cards and calls last year. I guess it helped me along. This year was a little different. There were still those True "Blue" friends that we there for me and Taylor. It was nice to pick up the phone and hear a familiar voice saying they haven't forgotten! Leigh Ann called last week. She had a dream about you. She said we were at some Amusement Park and were waiting to get on a ride. I looked over and there was a guy standing with his back to us. I said to her, "That looks just like Jeff". She said, "No way...he's too skinny to be Jeff" (Sorry Baby, but you didn't miss many meals Ha Ha). Anyway, we rode the ride and as we walked passed this stranger, I grabbed his arm and turned him around. IT WAS YOU!! She said you told me that you had wanted to call, but you couldn't. You said that you had been involved in a huge drug bust and the suspect had threatened harm to me and Taylor if you testified. You had to fake your death to protect me and Taylor. Leigh Ann said she woke up feeling like that had really happened and it took her a few minutes to realize it was just a dream. I guess that all sounds silly. But I would give anything for that to be true. Jeff, I don't know how I'm going to make it without you. It seems to only get harder as time goes by. When I lost you...I lost all of my dreams, my desire and my hope. I am completely empty with out you. When I meet people on the street and they ask me how I'm doing... I choke back the tears as I say I'm doing just fine. I look at the cards and reflections often. My heart jumps for joy when I see a new reflection. I appreciate so much, the ones who take the time out of their busy days to show you respect and love. I read the reflection from "APD" annonymous. Tears were flowing when I read the lyrics to the song. I haven't heard the song yet, but I'll be trying my best to find it. It's so true, If you could come back from Heaven, you would be taking me back with you. Well Baby, I had better go for now. I need to go the store to get a few things. They're calling for a big snow. I know, you would say it is just a conspiracy with the grocery stores to get us to stock up on groceries. But after all, I don't have you to send out for milk and oreos anymore. I love you so very much and I miss you with every beat of my heart!

I'll see you in my dreams!

See you in a minute 1-4-3
Love
Tra

P.S. Taylor was selected at school to attend a study tour in Washington, DC. He is so excited and plans to take his classmates to the memorial wall to see your name. He will bring a special gift to place at the wall for you and Michael Gordon.

Tracie Hewitt
Jeff's Wife

February 10, 2006

dear sweetie,

sorry i havent been able to send you a reflection lately. as you know i dont have a computer, so i have to get someone to do it for me. jeff, you will never know how very much i miss you and love you. our lives have just seemed to have fallen apart without you here. i keep in touch with your mom and dad and michael's parents bob and carol as much as i can. we all feel the hurt and the loss of you everyday. as you know, jeff, i would have gladly taken yours or michael's place. time will never take you out of my heart or my thoughts. i look at your picture every morning and every night and as you know to tell you good morning and good night and to tell you i love you. i thank God Jeff that you were a part of our lives. My family was so blessed when you came into tracie and taylor's life. at times i feel like time has stood still when you were taken away so suddenly. we never had a chance to say good-bye, but i know someday we'll say hello again and i know you and michael will be standing and watching for those you left behind to join you. what a blessed reunion it will be and i feel like it won't be long until we can stroll over heaven together. so, until then you and michael keep watching over us, and until then know that there isn't a night goes by that i dont pray for every deputy, every highway patrolman, every policeman, fireman, and our military that is still in the line of duty. i hurt everytime i hear of another fallen hero because each of you are my heroes.

with all my love forever,

your other mom,

carolyn moore

carolyn moore
mother-in-law

February 8, 2006

Tracie,
I was thinking of Jeff the other day and a song came on the radio that brought tears to my eyes, and I wanted to share the beautiful lyrics that might sum up the loss of this great man. I hope the song is a blessing for you and may your heart heal and know your in many peoples prayers and thoughts. Here's the lyrics, and may God bless.

"If you came back from Heaven"

I wouldn't know what to say
I wouldn't know what to do
If you came back from heaven
And I could look at you
Would I fumble for the words?
Would I be a little shy?
Would I bust right out with laughter?
Or break right down and cry?

Oh,if you came back from heaven
Would it be like it was then?
Could we just pick up,where we left off
And try it all again?
Oh,if you came back from heaven
It would freeze me in my tracks
And I hope God knows,if he let you go
I'd never send you back

Do your kisses feel the same?
Do you still have the same touch?
And will you whisper softly
'Coz you've missed me so much?
Have you heard all my prayers
When I lay down at night?
And did you feel my body
When I held your pillow tight?

Oh,if you came back from heaven
Would it be like it was then?
Could we just pick up,where we left off
And try it all again?
Oh,if you came back from heaven
It would freeze me in my tracks
And I hope God knows,if he let you go
I'd never send you back

And if,God forbid,you leave this earth again while I see
I hope he knows if you go you'll be bringing me

ANONYMOUS
APD

February 4, 2006

Hi Jeff,

Hope I'm not hogging up all the space on your reflection page. Just wanted to stop in and say hi to you and let you know I was thinking about you and have the candle burning for you and Mike just about every night. Have a whole stock of the little candles so they will be burning for a long time. Keep watch over your family. I know that they have the feeling that their hearts were ripped out of them and in time I'm told that feeling will ease some but never go away. Keep protecting them and showing us all the right path to take.

Bob Gordon, father of fallen officer Michael P. Gordon, EOW: 8/8/04

Bob Gordon

January 31, 2006