Family, Friends & Fellow Officers Remember...

Hey little brother! I was just thinking about you. I miss you terribly but I hold on to the memories of you. Occasionally they surface to my thought path...awake or in a dream.

I know you watch over all of us but I am asking you to give some extra attention to your nephew Marquis and his wife during their pregnancy and to Dalton as he prepares to deploy overseas in a few months. I am a proud momma but nervous for both of them as they navigate their 2022 journeys.

Til our next meeting...
I love you!

Tracy Kubly
Survivor

March 14, 2022

April 4, 1970 was the happiest day of my life, I married your father. It's 51 years & counting.
January 16, 1975 was the 2nd happiest day of my lift, I gave birth to a wonderful, bouncing baby boy: Jason Eric Beal.
January 15, 2000, 22 years ago today, was the saddest, most heartbreaking day of my life: we had to say goodbye to you.

At times it seems like it was a long time ago; at other times it seems like only yesterday. You're missed as much today as you were 22 years ago. Dad & I have sat & reminisced about you several times in the past few days. We talk about you often so know that you are still on our minds & in our hearts. Sometimes the memories are funny, sometimes they hurt but, happy or sad, they are our memories. We wonder sometimes what life would have been like had you been here with us but that's something we can only wonder about. We know that all things happen for a purpose, we'll find out when the times comes what the purpose of your passing was.

Amanda & Nathaniel had a baby boy April 12, 2021, his name is Elias Paul Wolfe Krause. He's crawling & sitting up on his own, he's hand-feeding himself, & growing leaps & bounds. Has a lot of Amanda & Nathaniel in him, but as Amanda has seen, he has some of his Uncle Jason in him too. I know you can see him & that you probably have some laughs at some of his antics. He's such a happy baby & they are a happy family. They just bought a house & will be moving in February. Dad & I are going out for 3 weeks in March to help out. Looking forward to some more "Grandma time" with Eli. Dad's looking forward to going out too. He really smiles a lot when he's playing with him.

Everyone else seem to be doing OK, or at least they were at Christmas. Several of them have had COVID-19 and come out of it unscathed. Dad & I have managed to evade it.

I really miss you, Jason. You always brought a smile to my face when you came to visit or even called me. Your voice always rang of happiness and brought happiness to me. I enjoy seeing Emily & Cody. It may not be as often as I would like but we still see each other. Cody has your height, maybe even taller, and some of your facial features; Emily's hair color, but most of all: he has your voice. I can close my eyes when he's talking & it seems like you're in the room with us. Isn't imagination a wonderful thing!

I'll leave you for now with a thought: We love & miss you so much. You are always in our hearts & on our minds. We know that some day we will see you again.

Love,
Marion & Gene Beal
Parents

parents
Parents

January 15, 2022

It's been 21 years today & I still hurt just now as much as I did then. Dad & I still miss you terribly, son, perhaps more than anyone could ever know. Today it seems that the pain of that loss is more excruciating than in past years. Don't know why, maybe it's because we're getting older & things affect us more. Something strange happened this morning, though, that has never happened before. At 8:30 a.m. Dad & I were both woke up from a deep sleep by a single chime, just one note. We don't know what it was but we know it came from somewhere here in the house. It wasn't the doorbell (I checked) & it wasn't a dream because we both heard it from different rooms. Could it have been you? We'll never know since there's no way finding out. You've been known to do strange things to other people, but never to us.

Amanda & Nathaniel are expecting! Due in April. We'll find out if it's a boy or girl when it's born, they want it to be a surprise for everyone. She's getting big early & fast (just like I did when I carried you). First thing out of her mouth when she found out that the baby is 3 weeks ahead of normal rate was: "Mom, I think I'm carrying a 'Jason'!":) I have to agree, she's big for her term. They've decided on a girl's name, but not on the boy's. I guess that, too, is going to be a surprise.

I keep in touch with Emily & Cody. They seem to be doing OK even with this COVID-19 thing. Cody's packing & getting ready to go back to college for the semester. I keep him in my prayers & hope he stays safe while he's gone.

Tomorrow's your birthday - # 46 - even though you're ageless in heaven I'll say HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! anyway. Wonder sometimes what you would look like now with gray hair [or bald, like dad :)] & how many kids you & Em would have. They would all have been VERY spoiled, knowing you. Know that you are in our hearts & on our minds especially for the next couple of days.

Will leave you for now but know that you are ALWAYS in our hearts.
Love you & Miss you

Mom & Dad
Parents
January 15, 2021

Gene & Marion Beal
Parents

January 15, 2021

I had somewhere in life forgotten Jason. Then I had a dream last night that I was able to finally say good bye. He was just as he always was. Smiling, happy and doing. Always busy. I recognized him in an instant and ran up to him. We talked and I just had to get some things off my chest. I told him he was a great friend and I was able to say goodbye. It was something I needed.

Spencer Hamner
US Air Force

January 17, 2020

J,

I wrote this on my FB page last night. I feel like many of my letters go to you here, so I'm adding it. For those who happen across this page & read our reflections I pray that you see hope & perseverance in my journey.

"I've been debating all day, "what do I post?", "Should I post?" If you know me, you know what's been on my mind.

Today is a big day. I cannot let today go by without saying it, but this year it's different. I've been missing him for 20 years, but this year... I feel a bit guilty because I'm celebrating not just surviving but living 20 years later. I had a friend ask me to imagine what it would be like if my 41 year old self were able to talk to my 21 year old self.

Here are a few things I might tell her:

1. You are in an emotional pit right now. There will be people who come into your life that will reach their hand out to help you. Listen to that voice in your head because while most have good intentions, not all do. But those who do, become your family.

2. Jason never lied to you. When he told you that you are more beautiful than you know & stronger than you think; it was the truth. Believe his words.

3. God's grace is amazing. His shoulders are big. He can handle all the anger you throw at Him and He will still bless you along your journey.

4. Grief does not get better with time. It gets better when you do the work.

5. There will be days you want to throw in the towel & leave this world. Listen to that small voice that stops you. The dark moments can be overwhelming, but they are not forever. I promise.

6. You will keep your promise to Jason. You remember the one? I know you do. He stopped the car, looked into your eyes & made you promise if anything ever happened to him - you would find love again. It will take longer than what he wanted for you. It's not a perfect love (that doesn't exist), it's an amazing love.

7. Your son will grow into an amazing young man. He's still creating his own path. He is the product of your's & Jason's best qualities.

The rest I would leave for my 21 year old self to figure out. What fun would life be if we already knew the ending?

For all my friends who have read this far. Life is full of battles & blessings, and sometimes the sweetest blessings are found in the midst of your toughest battles. My son was one of my sweetest blessings. God didn't stop there. He sent Chris & Dylan into my life, and later Liam.

My life is not what I planned or wished it would be. My life is so much greater than I could have ever imagined. I wish the same for each of you: a life better than you could have ever imagined."

I will always love you & appreciate the gift that your love has been in my life.

Forever your wife,
Em

Emily Beal-Nelis

January 16, 2020

20 years ago today at 3:22 p.m. we lost a very precious, loving, & beautiful person in our life. When we lost you, Jason, we suffered a loss that we will never forget. Although life goes on, it's hard but it's also something that we know you would want us to do.

A lot has happened in the last few month: Amanda has married - Nathaniel is a super nice person and good to her. Theirs is a very good match. Cody has started college. He's getting so tall - taller than you (I think), and such a good person. He's loved very much. Danny's been through health problems. David & the family has moved to Colorado. Terri has bought a home. Dad & I are getting ready to celebrate our 50th anniversary, an occasion that we wish you were going to be here for but we know you will be with us in spirit. We're trying to decide how we are going to celebrate but can't come up with a good choice.

We miss you so much, son, and always will. You are forever in our thoughts and look forward to the time when we can finally be together. Till then, know that we will love you always.

Love ya much!

Gene & Marion Beal, parents

January 15, 2020

J,

It's happening today. Cody and I are packing up the car and moving him to college. I cried this morning, not tears of sadness, but tears of joy and relief. When you died over 19 years ago, you left a scared 21 year old, pregnant girl. I questioned if I could raise our child. I questioned if I could continue breathing without you. This day seemed impossible. Today, I thank God that He helped me every step of the way. He sent wonderful people into our lives to help us during our journey. He was there even through my fierce anger towards Him. Today, our baby is now a young man beginning the journey of life on his own. He has great mentors and peers who know exactly what it is like to overcome the loss of a parent in the line of duty. I am so proud of who he has become. I have no doubt that you are too. Continue to watch over us and send your love. We feel it daily.

Your wife,
Em

August 12, 2019

Uncle Jason,

Hi uncle Jason it’s you older nephew dalton. Sorry I never write to you I could never really build the strength too. I miss you so much wish you could be here to see everyone and what they been up to. I have been in the military for 6yrs now. I joined because of you. I looked up to you and I still do. You are my role model. Mom and uncle Danny and David have told me so many stories of you guys growing up some of which are pretty funny. Everything in with the family is going okay it could be better. Uncle Danny just got out the hospital a couple of weeks ago from heart issues but he’s doing better now. And we were really close to losing mom a few years ago but she pushed through and she’s been doing a lot better now. Marquis has a family of his own which is great for him. I have been focused on making a career for myself so no family. But I think that’s enough for now I will talk to you later uncle Jason I really miss you and can’t help to get all flustered and sad when I think about you. I love you until next time.

Dalton
Nephew

June 10, 2018

Was thinking about you this morning and thought of lots of great memories including when we had the opportunity to play basketball on the same floor together in high school. I hope peace is with you.

Jeremy
Cousin

April 25, 2018

Dearest Jason,

I won't take up much time for I have already said everything several times over in the past 18 years. We think about you a lot especially this time of year. We cherish the memories we have and wonder once more how different things would have been if only you were still here.

We've been thinking a lot here lately about moving into a condo. With our age & health, the house is getting to be too much. It's kinda hard to think about leaving it and all of the memories that it holds but it is only a house. When & if we do leave it, those memories will go with us. I know you would want us to make things easier on ourselves & would be pushing us if you were here but after living here for 44 years, it will be hard to say goodbye to it.

Your little sister has someone special in her life (finally). He's very nice and treats her with respect. I think you would approve.

Cody & Em are doing fine. Cody is soooo precious & is loved so much. He's doing well in school & basketball. Always makes us proud and I know he does you also.

Will go for now. You're still deeply loved & sadly missed. Will see you again someday.

Love,
Mom & Dad

Marion & Gene Beal
Parents

January 16, 2018

NEVER FORGOTTEN!
www.copscycling4survivors.org

NEVER FORGOTTEN!
Cops Cycling for Survivors Foundation

January 15, 2018

Our Dearest Jason,

Today marks the 17th Anniversary of your passing. January 15, 2000 seems so long ago but yet seems like only yesterday. The pain & hurt are still with us. We miss you so much. Just want you to know that we are doing as well as can be expected for people our age.

Know you are watching so there's really no need to tell you about how Cody & Emily are doing. We're sure that you keep them under your ever-vigilant care. One thing for sure, you can tell that Cody is your son. He has done so many things, especially here lately, that are reminiscent of your high school days.

Tomorrow you would have turned 42. Still find ourselves wondering what you would have looked like with gray hair, how many kids you would have had by now, or if you would still be a Trooper. As much as you loved your job, think the last thing would have been a "no brainer".

Just wanted you to know that we still think about you a lot and find ourselves reminiscing about your "antics". There's a lot of humor to be found in your actions. With each thing we remember, we see a lot of the same things in Cody. Boy does Em ever have a lot to look forward to!

Not a day goes by that we don't think of you. See you soon, son. Miss you & love you dearly.

Mom & Dad

Gene & Marion Beal
Parents

January 15, 2017

J,

It's happening today. Our baby, that you never met, is going to the BMV to get his driver's license. Please, always be in the vehicle with him. Let him feel your presence. Watch over him. He's a pretty good driver, but this momma worries!

He's a sophomore in HS now. He's making all A's & 1 B. He's honest & trustworthy. He holds up the Beal name with honor. I know you are proud! I am!

Love Always,

Em
Widow

September 13, 2016

RIP Hero. You are remembered today!

Former Sheriff's Deputy
Marion County Sheriff, Indiana

March 21, 2016

J,

Well, our baby (not so much of a baby anymore), just survived his first Outward Bound experience. I should mention here, that I just survived it too! He left on a plane by himself to Grand Junction Colorado with a connection in Denver. He spent the night in a hotel with his friends and fellow surviving teens. Then they took off for the Colorado River. I have no doubt that you were able to look in on him during their journey down the River! He called me this morning (after 6 days) to let me know they were off the River. He had a blast & I can't wait to hear all about it! I know you would be so very proud! He's growing into such a fine young man!!

We continue to love & honor you daily!

Love, M

Your Wife

August 2, 2015

If you knew Jason, you knew his bright smile. A excellent Trooper, Jason's death is a tragic loss to his family and to Indiana.

Lt. (Ret)
Indiana State Police

October 10, 2014

Hey Jason, it's Mom. I haven't written much lately but I know that it's what you would want. Em is always saying how you wouldn't want us to be mourn you all the time and she's right. We've been trying and I think we're progressing, slowly. It's been 14 years today and for some reason it was a rough day. Tomorrow would have been your 39th birthday. I can't even tease you about the 1st anniversary of your 39th birthday. Would have been a lot of fun to rib you. Dad & I still handle things our way. You know we always did things our way and so did you. We always walked to the beat of a different drum. Nothing wrong with being different. Not everything we do sets with people, but who cares. Mostly we just try to do what pays honor to your memory.

Em & Cody did something for Christmas that was the sweetest thing they could have done and the best gift I could have received. I know she's already told you about the DVD she made of you and escapades. I had told her a LONG time ago that I would give anything to hear your voice again. The DVD does just that and oh how wonderful it is to be able to hear your sweet voice and that infectious laugh of yours. I couldn't have asked for a better gift. I dearly love her & she knows it. We love all of our kids and they know it. Couldn't ask for a better bunch except to you have here it the bunch too. We'll have to love you from afar for a bit longer I guess.

Cody is getting to be such a good looking boy. Looks so much like his father. You have to be so proud. I wish I could see you when you think about him. I know you'd be beaming with pride and all smiles from ear to ear. He's an all around boy - athlete, hunter, fisherman & I'm sure that somewhere along the line he'll add something else to the list. He has so much to give in him and he's so much like you. Try as we do to treat him as his own man, it's so hard. He has so many of your attributes. He knows that when we compare the two of you that we do so with pride. We have told him so many times that we want him to be his own person even if we do compare the two of you. As your parents and his grandparents, it's hard not to compare.

Enough said for tonight. Don't want to monopolize the site. Know that your dad and I both love and miss you dearly. We know that it won't be long before we see you again so we live with our memories and wait for that time. Until then, be happy in knowing that we are proud of you and what you achieved in your short life. We also so very proud of Em and Cody for what they accomplished thus far know that you are too. See you when the time is right!

Love you and miss you dearly,
Mom & Dad

Michael & Marion Beal
Parents

January 15, 2014

I recently had our old home videos transferred to DVD. I didn't feel safe trying to play the VCR tapes - afraid the machine would eat them.

Cody & I were watching them. He said it was the first time he heard your voice. I hadn't realized that. We will forever cherish the memories of you that were caught on video! And thank you to the nice young man who transferred them to DVD for us!!!

Oh & I gave a copy to your parents & siblings for Christmas! I think they all enjoyed it!

We miss you always!

Love,
M

Your loving wife

December 30, 2013

Rest in Peace, Trooper Beal. Your sacrifice is not forgotten.

Officer 11169

February 17, 2013

We didn't know him long but in the few days we got to spend with him and his wife we realized just how very special he was. Till this day, 13 years later we remember his infectious smile, how he lovingly gazed at his wife and played with Chris like two little children running around soaking each other with supersoakers at universal studios as if they'd known each other all their lives. He giddily spoke of their baby to be and how much he was looking forward to the day. It was too soon to know the sex but what was certain was the infinite love that would bind them eternally. High school sweethearts they were, a love that was beyond limits, boundless. This was no ordinary couple, no this was a relationship built on solid values. As with his marriage to his sweetheart he was So proud to have just joined the ranks of the brotherhood and you could see he took the responsibility seriously, to him it was an honor to work amongst great men that put their lives on the line. He shared with us his love of hunting and how a deer could feed them all winter long. We enjoyed a murder mystery dinner together and laughed like two teenage couples. The next day they stopped by our hotel room and obliged when we invited them into the jacuzzi, but not for too long because it could be dangerous for their baby to be. Down to earth, simple, and humble people. Who were this young couple we were drawn to? What made us cross paths? To put it short. Jason and Emily, were magical, because I cannot speak soley to who Jason was; simply because Emily was so much a part of him and who he was. She was his very essence and clearly he lived for her. Jason we couldn't stop thinking of you guys on the way back home. You definitely made a mark on us. We cherished those few days in your company. We admired the fine human you personified and till this very day Christian and keep you in our hearts and smile each time we think of you, remembering you ever so fondly. We are blessed to have made your acquaintance and friendship and we will forever be thankful that our paths crossed. 13 years later we rejoice in Emily's accomplishments, in her joys and in her triumphs. Clearly you had much to do with the very wonderful person, and mother she is today. Rest in Peace dearest Jason accompanied by all your friends the Angels and Saints. Love Helen and Christian Reda, your New York friends who you one day met on a cruise in Florida.
January 15, 2013

Helen and Christian Reda
Friends

January 15, 2013

Another Christmas without you. This is Cody's 12th Christmas. I have always had help with making Christmas special for him, but I have always wondered how you would have contributed in making this day special if you were given the chance.

I know you are proud. I know you know how much we miss you. If I could have one Christmas wish - it would be that Cody could have his dad for a day! (longer if possible, but at least a day!)

We love you. One day we will know how you celebrate Christmas at Home. One day you will be surrounding us in your love in the home you have prepared for us. Until then, know that we continue to have our traditions to honor & remember you!

Your Surviving Wife

December 25, 2012

I have followed the reflections on this site for some time. Out of respect for Jason's family, I have avoided posting as I did not know Jason or his family, though I have talked wiht troopers who attended the academy with him, and I am not in law enforcement family.

But, I remember several of my former lost college friends contacting me in 2000 to verify I was OK. Having been in the military, some friends thought I might have ended up in law enforcement and were concerned upon the tragic news.

You see, I'm the other Jason Beal (not the most common name) from southern Indiana (Bloomington, which is not far from Shelbyville). Since 2000 (with google), many people have shared that they found Jason's story when looking for me. It's hard not to feal a kinship with Jason. We may not have been related (not sure of that), but Trooper Beal clearly represented our common name with honor. I wish I had known him. His family, espeically now that I have my first son (1 year old), is often in my thoughts and prayers.

Jason Beal
Southern Indiana

September 26, 2012

Took a picture of our son shooting your 22 this week. He's looking more & more like you! He's growing up to be a fine young man. He's still learning not to mouth of to Mom (but then again that was a lesson you were still learning too ;). I know you're proud. I am.

We've had a trying summer. Many reminders this summer of how much we are missing without you here. Cody stepped up his game in baseball this summer. He started pitching. We both wished you were in the stands to see that! Cody went to a 7-day conservation officer camp in memory of Karl Kelley. He learned so much at camp. He also discovered why you first wanted to be a conservation officer. Another moment we wished you were here to witness. I finally received my Master's degree in Social Work. I know I should be elated to have finally finished, but all I could think of was that this was one huge task I started & finished after your death. I missed having you cheer me on and seeing that smile on your face when I graduated! I know that you would be bragging to everyone you met. There's so much that I miss about you. There's so much that Cody wishes he knew about you & wishes he could share with you.

Your presence is missed here. Love you dearly!

Em
Wife

August 14, 2012

Son, I'm so sorry. It's been entirely too long since I last wrote. I talk to you every day and kiss you picture each morning and night. You know how much you mean to me and to your father and you must undoubtedly know how much we continue to miss you. We're doing OK for our ages. We know, too, that our time is coming when we will see you again. When that time nears, we will not be afraid. Our lives have been full and we have enjoyed our time here on earth but "all things must come to an end". I know I look forward to seeing you again and I'm sure your father does too. There are times when I take my walks that I talk to you the entire time I'm walking. If anyone ever heard me, I'm sure they would send the men in the little white jackets after me with the strait jacket! I have asked to have a dream of you so that I could hear that infectious laugh of yours and have been blessed with a couple. Needless to say I awake refreshed after a dream of you. I'm sure you know just how much Dad & I miss you but you also know that we have managed to move forward as you want us all to do. That doesn't mean that we have forgotten you. By no means have we done that! It is our fondest wish that what we have been able to do makes you proud. I still cry for you and wish I could hold you and see your blue eyes and smile but know too that you would want us to carry on. We do so in your memory and hopefully with your blessing. I'll have to wait till my time comes to hold you, see those beautiful blue eyes and that bright smile.

Cody and Em are doing well. Em just graduated from college. She will complete her practicum in late July and will receive her Master's degree. We are so proud of her! She may take off a year until Liam starts full-time school. She then wants to proceed with aspirations using her degree. We hope for nothing but the best for her. Cody is an excellent athlete, taking after his father, I might add. He keeps improving in his baseball prowess and I'm sure that will carry over to his basketball abilities too. His hunting and fishing is continually improving. I wish you were here so we could see how proudly you're strutting when you see him! He sure makes us proud. There have been a few times when Dad & I have called him "Jason" when he makes an error for he looks and acts so much like you! We can see so much of you in him but we are quick to point that he is his own man. He acts and looks like Daddy but he will "walk to the beat of his own drum." Chris, Dylan, & Liam are all fine too. They all support each other as a family and gather strength from each other.

Your other neices & nephews as well as your brothers & sisters are progressing well. They each have their strong points and seem to be happy and thriving. We try to get together on Sundays for some catch-up time and so the little ones can see their cousins. Most of them manage to make it but some of them don't.

I could write more but I know you already know what's happened the past few months. Just know that Em and I could sure use your strength to come back from the difficult and inaccurate times we've encountered. Keep us and our families in your prayers.

Lots of love to you. We'll see you soon.

Love,
Mom & Dad

Gene & Marion Beal
Parents

June 6, 2012

Twelve years ago today the decision was made to turn off the machines that kept your heart beating & your lungs breathing. I did not make this decision. You did. You made the decision long before the accident that resulted in you lying in that hospital bed. You made repeating your wishes easier because I know that your soul left this world long before the machines were turned off. Every time I entered your ICU room I felt your love - up until right before I had to repeat your wishes. That time...your room was empty. I kept praying I was wrong, but the doctor's confirmed my fears.

During your stay in the hospital I made you several promises. I promised to take care of our boy, that he would always know your love. I promised to continue living as soon as I was able to learn how. I promised to make you proud. I feel that I have fulfilled all those promises to you. Cody is a tall, vibrant 11 yr old boy. He knows that you love him. He knows that you would be proud of all of his accomplishments. And he knows that you are cheering him on, every time he stumbles you & I are there to help pick him up & cheer him on to continue his journey. He knows he is living his own journey. He is not to follow or continue yours - his journey is all his own. He may choose a journey similar to yours, but it is all his own. I learned how to find happiness again. I have surrounded myself with wonderful family & friends. I have a man in my life who accepts me - the good, bad, & difficult! I know what I want in my life. I am working hard to reach each goal. (hopefully graduating with my master's soon!!)

Each day is lived knowing that you gave me the wonderful gift of your love & influence. Thank you! I love you dearly!

Here's my next promise to you. I am writing it on here to make myself accountable. Tomorrow is your birthday. So, my gift to you is to take care of myself. I am going to start the P90X program. For myself & our family, I will finish it!

Emily Beal-Nelis
Surviving Spouse

January 15, 2012